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What to do?

(3 Posts)
Mumtolittlelilac Wed 26-Sep-12 22:15:14

Hi everyone,

My little girl is 7 months tomorrow and has been going to a childminders for 3 days a week, 9.45 hours a day. She has been going for 4 weeks now and had her settling in week prior to this, however she is just so unhappy.

She cries at the childminders anytime she is put down to play and is nervous and anxious around other people on my days off, which she was not before. By a Sunday I just about have her happy again and then on a Monday morning she is back to the childminders and she is sad all over again.

I have tried everything I can think of: we have a picture of the childminder, she has pics of us and a voice recording (which apparently calms her a little) she takes the top I have worn the day before, she takes her favourite toys and teddies to sleep with and I always ensure I pass her over quickly and confidently, saying goodbye and that I will be back later.

She is usually such a happy little girl and it it killing me that she has spent nearly 30 hours a week in tears for the last month. We had her weighed last week and she had only put on 4oz in a month, which the health visitor said was a big concern as she is only a little dot anyway.

I am hating work and can't wait to leave but even if I hand my notice in now I can't leave until Christmas. I feel that I need someone to look into a crystal ball and tell me a) this will all be fine within the next few weeks or B) this isn't going to resolve itself anytime soon, in which case I will need to have serious thinks.

The childminder is lovely and has done everything she can but with no joy ~ I just don't know what to do and have spent most of September in tears.

Any advice or thoughts would be greatly appreciated!! x

Rockchick1984 Thu 27-Sep-12 09:00:40

I really feel for you, my DS around that age had horrible separation anxiety too. Luckily I was in a situation where it was possible for me to be a SAHM so made the decision not to go back to work.

Being honest, by Christmas there's a good chance your daughter will have got completely used to the childminder and will love being there. 3 months is a long time for such a young baby remember, nearly 50% of her life so far and look how much has changed already smile
Personally if you are hating your job and feel you would be better giving up then go for it - for me it was the best decision I could have made, but I know other Mum's who regretted it and are now job hunting again (my son is 18 months) and mums who are glad they went back to work.

If you do decide to leave, most employers will be reasonable about letting you leave before the end of your notice period, especially when it's not long since you returned from mat leave smile

Mumtolittlelilac Sun 30-Sep-12 19:00:17

Thanks for your reply ~ am giving it one more week!! Wish us luck!!! x

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