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Back to work on Monday, can someone please tell me it will all be ok.

(8 Posts)
chirpchirp Fri 16-Sep-11 23:49:45

How quickly ten months of maternity leave go by! I know I'm lucky to have been able to take so long and once I'm back I'll wonder what on earth I was worried about but just feeling so anxious about leaving DS. My childcare is all sorted and I'm really happy with the people who will be taking care of him but I'm just sad I won't get to spend as much time with him and have convinced myself I'm going to miss everything, first steps/first words etc).

I really like my job and I'm only going back three days a week, I know deep down everything will be fine, just having a bit of a wobble.

piellabakewell Sat 17-Sep-11 07:35:52

I went back full time when DD was 4 months old...she's 14 now! I've always worked (primary teaching now, but office job then) and she's flourished and knows I don't love her any less because I work. You will always miss moments of their lives, as you cannot be with them 24/7 (especially as teenagers!) and that first word or first step is equally likely to happen when DS is with dad/grandma etc while you put the kettle on or are in the bath.

Don't worry, he'll be fine and so will you.

matana Sat 17-Sep-11 09:33:45

Yes, i'm not saying this just to make you feel better but you will be fine. I found it was the run up to going back to work that was worse than actually doing it. When you're at work you'll be too busy to dwell on things, although of course you'll miss your LO. I went back FT a few weeks ago and am envy of those who are PT, which i feel is the perfect solution if you like to work but love being a mum too. It's a happy medium. I won't lie, i miss him terribly but those evenings, weekends and holidays are now so much more special.

Anyway, going back wasn't nearly as bad as i thought it would be and DS (10 months) is so, so happy with his CM. When i drop him off he smiles at her, holds his arms out and then wants to get straight into the thick of it with his new pals - he's a real social butterfly and i've seen such a change in his interaction with others. When i collect him he smiles, holds his arms out for me and snuggles just like when he was a newborn and i've missed that!

You have given your LO the best possible start in life and by allowing him to interact more with others from now on, you're doing the best you can to help him develop into a happy, sociable little man. It's the next step in his life-long development and i'm sure you'll find it a positive one.

Best of luck smile

SazZaVoom Sat 17-Sep-11 09:39:40

Absence makes the heart grow fonder grin

In all seriousness though, much as i love my DC's, being with them 24-7 suits none of us. I work 2 days a week and love the adult interaction, being thanked for doing things, having my input valued and being able to do things without having a constant 'alert eye' for what else is going on around me. Having a break from 'responsible adult' is also necessary for me.

It is fab that you are happy with your childcare arrangements, it will all help. Good luck and i hope you all enjoy the new phase in your lives smile

lchodge Sat 17-Sep-11 16:40:52

I went to back to work full time when my first child was 9months (she's now 5) and I hated and regretted every minute of it. I work shifts though and I think if I had a 9-5 mon-fri job it would have been easier as it's impossible to get into a routine with my hours!
Second child is due in 3 weeks and I already know (although I haven't told my partner or my boss yet) I'm not going back full time. I'm thinking 16 hours over 2 days but not sure how it will work financially yet. However I would rather be skint and with my kids than well-off and wishing I was with them.
Also as childcare can be very expensive you often find your entire earnings for the day are going to someone else looking after your kids. This doesn't sit well with me!
3 days a week is a good balance and though it might seem hard at first, at least your at home more than your not smile

chirpchirp Sun 18-Sep-11 22:23:02

Thanks for all your replies, not feeling too bad right now. I bumped into my childminder today and we had a nice chat and she reassured me too. Actually kind of looking forward to catching up with my old work mates. Thanks again.

StephA Fri 07-Oct-11 13:51:20

Would be interesting and helpful to hear from the OP how the first weeks are going?

chirpchirp Mon 10-Oct-11 22:06:13

Sorry, did mean to come back again sooner. It's been almost a month now and to be honest I can't even remember what I was anxious about! It's possibly the fact that I find working three days a really nice balance and that everything has been great with my childcare but going back to work has actually been great, it's nice having your lunch with friends without tiny hands trying to swipe the food from your mouth! Thanks again for all the advice and reassurance smile

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