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Really worried 4 year old starting Reception.

(43 Posts)
mandyemma13 Sat 03-Sep-16 09:49:07

I am running out of ideas to teach my 4 year old. She can read pretty much anything. She was assessed last year in Nursery reading at an age 10 level. She excels in Maths and can count to over 100, add, subtract and divide. She is currently learning her times tables and how to multiply.
She loves science and understands biology of plants, animals and the human body. She has an app which teaches her the alchemy and chemistry. She knows most of the elements table.

In her nursery school she was getting very upset because the other children kept getting stickers and she wasn't. I asked them why and they had no reason and the next day she came home with 5 stickers. They was giving her books with no words in and after her being assessed they told me they can not go out of the curriculum to suit one child who can read.

I know she isn't a 'normal' child for 4. She plays Minecraft and watches you tube videos. She enjoys reading about dinosaurs and history. She teaches me things that I didn't even know.

Everyone tells me how good she is at speaking. She sounds posh the way she talks.

She is also learning Spanish and Geography. She understands the world map and knows all the capital cities. She goes on Google Earth. Currently she is very interested in China and wants to know why she can't see China on Google earth.

Here are some of the questions she asked me last night:

What is the world temperature in China.
Why do Americans have wooden houses and we have brick.
She wanted to know how the Romans built roads and walls.
She then asked about world food and how it was made. Asking me what people eat in China and New Zealand.
She then asked me about natural disasters and told me about volcanoes, earthquakes, floods and hurricanes.

I was not this bright at 4. I think I knew my colours and how to count to 10.

Anyhoo.. I am very worried about her starting another new school (due to the bidding system). I took her out of her old school as she seemed to be regressing and coming home crying or with an attitude. She kept telling me she hated me. And became a different child. Over the past 3 months she has now become back to her lovely and inquisitive self again and has not told me she hates me once.

I am worried the teachers won't be able to answer her questions she has and that she won't get the attention she needs. She gets very upset if people don't listen to her when she is telling them information.

Should I just see how this school goes without telling the teachers her needs or should I home school her? I am at home all day anyway with my 8 month old.


TheoriginalLEM Sat 03-Sep-16 10:00:38

You need to talk to the SENCO at the school. They will have a G & T protocol. She needs school.

LuchiMangsho Sat 03-Sep-16 10:03:05

Why won't teachers answer her questions? But to be fair the teachers will be teaching to a curriculum and they will make allowances for her but she will have to slot in. All the extra 'enrichment' you will have to do at home.

My son is pretty much the same and can do almost all that your daughter can. He goes to a private school (was in nursery there and going into Reception next week). I expect even in a private school that while they will push him, give him extension work, there is only so much they can do. The rest of the 'learning' he does with us at home.

When she is telling people information people don't have to listen. My son is the same and I have taught him, somewhat brutally (ie by saying 'this is not what Mummy wants to talk about now) that not everyone is always interested in what he has to say. Fitting in and social skills (without dumbing down) are also important. I am happy to listen to endless chatter about the world/capitals/music etc. But he also has to learn the art of conversation and that is a two way street.

Finally, the whole world is constantly telling him how clever he is. I have made a very conscious effort to point out that cleverness is not all. And it's fine to be clever but he has to try in school at things he is not good at (like gymnastics) and he has to make mistakes. I think v bright children are constantly being praised and are often shocked when that doesn't happen in school.

Aliveinwanderland Sat 03-Sep-16 10:04:30

How does she divide without knowing her tables yet?

You need to ask to speak to the G&T coordinator at school and find out what provision they have.

Andbabymakesthree Sat 03-Sep-16 10:05:42

should I just see how this school goes without telling the teachers her needs or should I home school her?
Why wouldn't you have already spoken to the school?!!
Why haven't nursery liased with school?

LuchiMangsho Sat 03-Sep-16 10:07:10

And while she can read fluently books without words are challenging a different creative part of her brain. It is important she engages with that while she reads harder books. Not getting stickers is a bit mean but actually she should know what she is getting stickers for, what she has done that is praiseworthy. Given my son can read fluently, if he read a book with CVC words and got a sticker I am not sure how pleased even he would be. But if read the same 'easy' book clearly, stopping for punctuation, doing the right voice and got a sticker for that, that would give him a real sense of achievement.

NerrSnerr Sat 03-Sep-16 10:09:51

I think you should speak to the school. How is she with other children? A lot of reception year is based on play and playing/ working together with other children.

mandyemma13 Sat 03-Sep-16 10:18:04

She is great with other children and plays imaginary games too. She does dancing on a Monday and competitions every other Sunday and has lovely friends in her dance class. She also plays with my friends children and children on the street.

Crasterwaves Sat 03-Sep-16 10:31:24

Your dd sounds amazing and as though she has a real thirst for knowledge and zest for life.

I think the most important thing is to talk to school about g&t, but at home to concentrate on the whole person. Eg social skills, turn taking, physical activity, enjoying music, drawing, cooking and plenty of child led free play where she can just "be"

In terms of her interests I would aim for broader not higher level iyswim eg not simply racing ahead reading more and more books at higher levels unless she is desperate to, but broadening out by playing libraries, creating pretend book reports with pictures, acting out the plot of books etc etc.

Crasterwaves Sat 03-Sep-16 10:34:08

Just one more thing. You say she has good social skills and I think many four year olds struggle as she does with understanding the spotlight won't always be on them. If she gets that understanding from school that will be very beneficial for her as it is an important social skill we all need eg for work etc.

Crasterwaves Sat 03-Sep-16 10:34:49

By struggle I mean you said she finds it hard when people don't listen to her.

mandyemma13 Sat 03-Sep-16 10:45:40

Thank you hun. We do cooking, music and drawing on Rainy days.

I havnt thought about doing role play with a libary. We do play shop and she is always free to be a child she does just prefer learning.

She does take turns and shares she has a brother she loves and shares her teddies with. Although she does have a meltdown if she doesn't win at games (she is very competitive) and she does need to learn to let other people have attention.


headinhands Sat 03-Sep-16 10:47:43

So much of reception is learning the social skills of being part of a group. That's the bread and butter. Even the children that enter reception reading still have so much to learn about the skills required to get on with people.

mandyemma13 Sat 03-Sep-16 10:48:52

She has blocks or beads or sweets and divides them into groups. So say 10 ÷ 5 she gets 10 blocks out and then puts them into 5 groups (she normally colour codes them as well) and then she says the answer. 2 each.

mandyemma13 Sat 03-Sep-16 10:50:26

It's a different school she is going too.

headinhands Sat 03-Sep-16 10:57:42

And the activities are open ended so children can take their learning where they want so one child will practice handling spoons in the sand tray whereas another will use the scales to explore weight and capacity etc

LittleBearPad Sat 03-Sep-16 11:11:43

I wouldn't say nothing to the teachers. That doesn't seem to help anyone.

I took her out of her old school as she seemed to be regressing and coming home crying or with an attitude. She kept telling me she hated me. And became a different child.

Did you get to the bottom of why this was?

I am worried the teachers won't be able to answer her questions she has and that she won't get the attention she needs. She gets very upset if people don't listen to her when she is telling them information.

This is what she's going to have to learn at school. She'll be in a class of 30, the teachers will not be sale to give her the attention you do. But actually she needs to learn that thus is the case and accept that telling people stuff isn't always going to make them listen.

validusername Sat 03-Sep-16 11:20:14

Ds was exactly the same at 4. He is 6 now and going into year 2 and he absolutely loves going to school. They give him extension work and he goes up with the class above to do some literacy and maths.

The school do everything they can to encourage his natural thirst for knowledge. He regularly comes home with stickers and rewards.

mandyemma13 Sat 03-Sep-16 12:57:46

Wow that actually gives me hope. Thank you! I hope her new school helps her like that. There is only so much I can teach her x

catkind Sat 03-Sep-16 16:38:57

Alchemy? grin Algebra maybe? If she can do alchemy I wouldn't worry about school, unless it's Hogwarts.
DD's school gave us a "what can they do" sheet to tick off including a box for anything else you wanted to mention, so I mentioned that she is a fluent reader. Anything more than that I'm leaving till the 6 weeks in parents' evening. I have the impression school are very unwilling to engage with us on what they do for G&T until they have actually seen and assessed the child, presumably in case it's all in our heads!

irvineoneohone Sat 03-Sep-16 17:46:50

cat, I thought algebra too. But my ds loves being a alchemist in video games , mixing a+b makes x, and c+d makes y and all that stuff!

catkind Sat 03-Sep-16 18:59:59

Little Alchemy is rather fun, does your DS play that Irvine? but I wouldn't really list in my kids' academic achievements!

irvineoneohone Sat 03-Sep-16 19:12:34

He plays 12+,16+ games, cat. grin not at all academic and totally age inappropriate.

JustRichmal Sun 04-Sep-16 10:53:59

If you are seriously considering home education, you could always post on the home education board to get their perspective. Also ask a local HE group if you could go along to a meeting to see what it is like.

A child will advance much quicker when taught 121. There are also lots of books and websites to help with education.

Lots of people dip in and out of home education. For instance you could see how she goes in reception or year 1 , take her out for a couple of years and let her return when she is older. The schools, however, will not keep a place. So this is something else to consider.

Lastly if you do home educate and you then want her to go back to school you have to seriously consider how the school will manage her education if she is far ahead. After years of struggling, I now have a very good relationship with dd's present school. The solution for one subject with dd is to still teach at home, guided what to teach by school and set homework for lessons, with the school providing additional support outside lesson time. I think it is unrealistic to just put a child who is advanced in any subject in a class with 30 others and just expect the teacher to get on with making special provision for one child in their class.

mandyemma13 Sun 04-Sep-16 12:50:22

I think my phone auto put that in I just meant to put chemistry and physics. She knows all the planets and solar system etc. Knows how many moons each planet has.

I am not clever myself and nor do I pretend to be. I was pretty average in school and struggled through uni. The question is what else can I teach her. I don't know where to go beyond this. Basically her tablet and you tube is teaching her more than me.

And yes she does play games that might not be age appropriate.. but she won't play with peppa pig anymore. hmm

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