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Too embarrassed to sing my child's praises in RL which makes me feel I'm holding them back

(11 Posts)
Normalisavariantofcrazy Tue 29-Apr-14 16:38:19

Thank you all! I had totally forgotten this post when I came over to read the books thread.

They are a very arty child, into dance and music which they thoroughly enjoy without much pressure to practice. I hadn't thought about a language, nor have I a clue where to start looking into starting that! (I'm rubbish at languages)

I'll look at getting some puzzle books for them, hadn't thought of something so simple!

They have also started getting into helping my dad with making dolls houses so I suppose that's another form of thinking and problem solving as well as helping maths etc.

Thank you all for your help and support! I must admit the post about it being normal did put me off a bit

BackforGood Wed 23-Apr-14 12:46:14

What siximpossible said. Widen their skill base rather than trying to elongate it.

SixImpossible Wed 23-Apr-14 12:39:13

Had another thought: start them on another language, a musical instrument, or even both. You could also look at coding. That is something that they can learn independently, and there are also many peer-mentoring opportunities to help them develop their skills.

Au79 Sat 12-Apr-14 11:08:31

Also your instinct that sailing through early school has a downside is correct - eventually they will find something hard - if it happens later they can decide "I'm no good at that" and stop trying. A real problem if it is writing, or maths-quitting is not an option but they may not think that way.

Au79 Sat 12-Apr-14 11:04:24

Be aware that posting in this topic will always get you told that a) your child isn't really G&T (already done! Tick) and/or b) your concerns aren't valid because children should make mud pies 24/7 and liking to do any academics is terrible.

"Like" to SixImpossible's posts. Don't be afraid to advocate for your child in school, and let or help them follow any and all interests, even if those interests are totally freaky like actually enjoying reading writing and maths. You aren't boasting - would you hesitate if it was a sporting success?

SixImpossible Mon 07-Apr-14 16:48:08

4a/5c at the end of year 4 isn't that unusual

Really? hmm

Given that 4 is the expected level at the end of Y6, achieving that 2 years early does sound a little unusual to me.

If your dc is happy working at their current level, and not bored, then 'sailing through' is fine. But if they are getting bored or are being used as a TA too often, then you need to be their advocate, even if you feel uncomfortable about it. Reminding teachers of your child's ability is not baseless boasting.

SixImpossible Mon 07-Apr-14 15:21:13

It doesn't need discussing. You can be as discreet as you like.

Talk to them about anything and everything. Listen to their opinions and encourage them. Get them to work out your everyday household problems, such as when to put loo roll on the shopping list, how to modify a recipe for different numbers or different ingredients.

Get into puzzle books. Get apps for your tablet that are about problem-solving and creative thought, rather than just angry birds.

Widen your and their reading. Read the more challenging books to them (eg classics) and discuss. Google Bloom's Taxonomy to get hints on questions and discussion leaders.

Go to museums, concerts, exhibitions.

iseenodust Mon 07-Apr-14 15:11:16

I'm not sure why the fact you don't want to talk about their level of ability would affect whether you decide to do a museum trip or take them to the library every week or find online resources on a favourite topic?

Acinonyx Thu 03-Apr-14 21:51:32

I'm also curious what you mean by the term 'academic support' (something you are currently withholding but could decide to provide). Can you explain what you mean here?

Being stretched at school is a common concern - all you can do there is talk to the teacher and ask how the work is differentiated.

Iamnotminterested Wed 02-Apr-14 11:00:05

Sorry, do you have one child or twins? confused

Don't really understand what your question is to be honest and not wishing to deflate you but 4a/5c at the end of year 4 isn't that unusual, are there other children that you know of in the class that are working at the same level?

Normalisavariantofcrazy Tue 01-Apr-14 22:34:52

I want to help and support them but I feel too embarrassed to ask for what best to do because of the level they're working at. They're in year 4 and expected to finish the year at level 4a/5c across the board.

My problem is I don't want them to become complacent or bored but still want them to fit in well with their peers so I've almost been subconsciously withholding support to hold them back which is awful I know but I don't know how else to deal with it.

They're a well rounded sociable child that has extra curricular activities they attend

I want to support them academically, but my embarrassment in feeling I can't discuss their ability in RL is really holding me back from doing this.

Is there anything I can do? The school seem to think that as they are sailing through they don't need to do anything or stretch my dc which is also causing me concern.

Sorry if this seems like a boast it really isn't it's simply me wanting the best for my child

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