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Tried to save someone but they passed away infront of children,

(72 Posts)
morningstar Mon 28-Sep-09 12:20:54

I am in shock and naturally upset but friends have said I should get checked out as I did cpr without protection please advise as I feel this is unrelevant.

OrmIrian Mon 28-Sep-09 12:23:12

Oh morning sad How terrible. I can't advise sorry.

Tortington Mon 28-Sep-09 12:24:00


KerryMumbles Mon 28-Sep-09 12:24:13

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

thumbwitch Mon 28-Sep-09 12:25:18

you mean you did mouth to mouth without protection? Did an ambulance come to the scene? You should have told them and they would have advised you of the correct thing to do.

So that it didn't work out but well done for trying.

stillstanding Mon 28-Sep-09 12:25:33

How awful. I am so sorry this has happened. I don't know about the risks but would imagine that it would be a good idea to get checked out in any case. I suspect that they are very small. Hopefully someone knowledgeable will be around in a minute.

AboardtheAxiom Mon 28-Sep-09 12:25:34

Oh that's terrible sad you poor thing. Do you mean the person who passed away, their children, or yours?

At least you did your best for them.

OhYouBadBadKitten Mon 28-Sep-09 12:27:14

I am really sorry for you. You tried though and in time I think you will realise how brave and good you were to try.

I actually think it may be good if you were to have a chat with someone medical, not just for reassurances about your own health but also I think it can help to be told by someone who knows what they are talking about that you did the right thing.

<un-mumsnetty hugs>

morningstar Mon 28-Sep-09 12:27:20

the mans children mine were not about, xx

MmeLindt Mon 28-Sep-09 12:29:07

How awful. I would speak to GP to put your mind to rest.

Well done for trying, sorry he could not be saved.

arcticlemming Mon 28-Sep-09 12:29:57

This must have been very distressing for you.
Any risks are extremely small, but contact your doctor or NHS direct and tell them the full story with relevant details (i.e. was the person bleeding etc.). They will hopefully put your mind at rest.

twirlymum Mon 28-Sep-09 12:30:48

Oh goodness, how awful.
Well done for trying to help. You could always try NHS direct for advice.

PortAndLemon Mon 28-Sep-09 12:34:12

From my recollections of first aid training, chances of any health issues for you are very very very very very small.

In later life his children will remember that someone cared enough to give their father every possible chance. Do you have someone there on whose shoulder you can have a good cry?

morningstar Mon 28-Sep-09 12:34:31

Thank you everyone I tried my best but there was nothing I could do but try and do the best I could and try and remain calm which was hard but im ok more upset for them. xx

Buda Mon 28-Sep-09 12:35:05

Gosh. I don't know what to advise but wanted to say well done for trying.

Can you say what happened? The poor children.

Doyouthinktheysaurus Mon 28-Sep-09 12:35:39

That's chilled me a bit. Hope you are feeling ok, what an awful experience.

Well done for doing what you could, I'm sorry the man diedsad

You should speak to your Gp, just for reassurance.

Jajas Mon 28-Sep-09 12:38:55

How traumatic for everyone involved, must be awful but so good that you did all you were able to. So sad.

PinkTulips Mon 28-Sep-09 12:39:36

you poor thing, well done for stepping up and trying to save him though, so many wouldn't have

afaik there's little enough really dangerous you can catch from the type of contact you would have had doing cpr, certainly hiv or aids wouldn't be communicable like that but like others have said it depends what he died from.

littleducks Mon 28-Sep-09 12:39:37

I think you should go to gp and tell them, i think it may affect you, it has made me so sad just reading it. I think you are prob in shock (which is normal)

I doubt that there is any real risk to you.

Good on you for doing something, so many people dont. I'm really sorry the man died but you did try, nobody could ask for more.

reikizen Mon 28-Sep-09 12:50:15

Well done you. My partner did a similar thing a few years ago and the man in question died then too. He also did CPR without protection because he's a good person and was trying to do the right thing (just like you). He still thinks about that day now but it doesn't upset him or worry him anymore. I don't think there is any health concerns for you (unless you know different about the man in question) but do expect to feel awful for a while. I know I do when we have a near miss or a death in my line of work and it comes back to me at night etc. Well done again, you're a good person. smile

Elibean Mon 28-Sep-09 13:03:30

(((morningstar))) well done you, its not everyone who could or would step up and try. Good advice re talking to medic pro, hopefully will give you lots of reassurance and help you process the shock a bit.

For those of us who don't know, please can someone say what we can protect ourselves with?? A tissue, for example? Would it let enough air pass? I've done First Aid courses, but can't remember this bit blush

PandaEis Mon 28-Sep-09 13:07:59

sad that is so sad!!

i would also suggest you go to speak to the GP about it not from a medical POV as the chance of cross contamination of disease/infection is very much a small one, but for a shoulder to cry on/discussing the incident with an impartial person stand point. it might help shift te shock and process what you did.

i did CPR on a collapsed elderly man in the pub about 5 years ago and i understand the trauma involvedsad he also died but had a heart condition so his family-though shocked- were not totally taken by surprisesad i had done it before as part of my job at that time but it was still a shocking and traumatic experience which i do think about sometimes.

well done for trying your best xx i am sure in years to come, the children will remember you as the lady who tried very hard to save their dadsad
xx ei xx

morningstar Mon 28-Sep-09 15:49:26

suspected heart attack they think, Cant go in to much detail I want to respect the family I just happended to hear crys for help and acted.Ive been in a daze today, had a cry kept thinking what if but in my heart I know I did the best I sad but I dont regret it for one moment im only sorry I couldnt of saved him and stopped the heart ache for his family{sad}thank you all for your words of comfort and kind words and advice.

midnightexpress Mon 28-Sep-09 16:01:58

Well done for doing the right thing. In a place I once worked years ago, a guy came in and collapsed and the boss wouldn't let anyone attempt ressucitation (erk, sp) because she was worried about her insurance shock. He died sad.

PortBlacksandResident Mon 28-Sep-09 16:12:16

It will come back into your mind when you least expect it - give yourself a chance to get over it (as much as possible). Really, be kind to yourself. That way the memories will fade better. Did you know him well?

A few years ago i tried to help my neighbour resuscitate her son who had hanged himself in the house, we had to break in to get to him. We were unsuccessful (in fact i felt so so sorry for the first response chap that arrived on the scene - he was so young). Two mornings later i awoke to hear her screaming just as if she was next to me on the bed - then i realised it was what i heard that day come back.

I'm not saying this will happen to you but i'm just trying to say take care and that you did fantastically well smile.

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