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should I go to the GP before trying for another baby

(7 Posts)
anon4this Tue 15-Mar-05 18:43:18

Not sure if this is the right thread for this - dithered between conception and pregnancy!

in short had a baby 18 months ago. There were some problems - he got stuck and was in respiratory distress so he was in special care for a week. I got PND,helped by the HV making me feel inadequate, felt forced to go to the GP, whoe referred me on - stayed off the meds though.

Feel fine now and am thinking about going for number 2. Thing is I don't know whether I should chat to the GP first about the likelihood of the same problem happening again at the birth, and whether I'd have to have an elective CS, I'm just a bit worried that if I go along he'll say that I shouldn't be trying again in case I get PND (although I dispute that's what I had), or he'll make the HV come and see me again.
I'm also not sure whether it would be wasting one of his appts and whether he can give me the info I need.

Any advice?


stitch Tue 15-Mar-05 18:48:32

if you want a baby, try for one, assuming no other problems that you havent mentioned.
i had pnd with number one and wth number three. a lot is to do with what support you have around youetc. good support, imo means that the baby blues dont develp into pnd. a difficult birth, special care for first baby, coupled with silly hv would drive anyone to pnd.
just go for it.

Tipex Tue 15-Mar-05 19:16:07

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

anon4this Tue 15-Mar-05 20:34:06

I think if I knew I would almost certainly have to have a CS then it would certainly affect my decision making on whether to go for number 2. I think I got very stressed last time as I perceived that i had "failed". I'm just concerned that I'd see, for me, a CS as another "failure".

I just don't know whether there is anything I should do before trying again (apart from staying off the donuts!). Not sure what practical advice the GP could give, also a bit worried that he'd think it was a bad idea. Also a bit worried that if I went to him after I got pregnant he'd think it was a bad idea!
Definitely think extra monitoring would make me feel worse. that's what stressed me last time round, all the extra HV visits. Wanted to tell her to get lost, but worried that they would think I had something to hide.
Suppose this is why I am dithering about going to GP. On one hand it may help me evaluate the potential risks to natural childbirth, on other it may get me "back in the system" and people will start trying to support me, although to me they'll be stresisng me out more.
Guess I'll have to dither a bit longer

Tipex Tue 15-Mar-05 21:20:08

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

stitch Tue 15-Mar-05 21:34:32

get another health visitor!

anon4this Wed 16-Mar-05 19:30:16

luckily I've not seen the HV for months, and intend to keep it that way.
The shoulder got stuck during the birth (and I'm not small) and I understand some Drs then recommend an elective CS for another child. I know a CS is not a "failure", as a healthy baby is the most important thing, but deep down I know I would think it was a failure to me, and I suppose I'm worried I'd get stressed over it again.
DP thinks last time was extremely frightening, and he felt totally useless. He would go along with whatever the Drs recommended.

I think I may go and chat to the GP. The worst he can say is that I've wasted his appt time with something that's not an illness, or his area of expertise.

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