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in hospital why do they say..

(20 Posts)
giraffescantdancethetango Thu 16-Oct-08 18:20:19

"can i just have a wee look?"

when what they actually mean is..."can i have a really close huge long look, with 3 other people around and prod you with lots of instruments and fingers at the same time?"

blush I forgot to leave my dignity at the door today and am feeling all embarassed now. Tell me they dont care and that they have seen it all before and I should stop cringeing every time I think of it etc

(Disclaimer staff were lovely cannot fault them, its me thats the problem)

MorticiaAnnSpookington Thu 16-Oct-08 18:26:52

they don't care and they've seen it all before...aaww though, it's not fun is it ?

NorthernLurker Thu 16-Oct-08 18:32:09

They say that because they don't want to frighten you! However your dignity and personal space should still be respected and that didnn't happen you could pass your comments along to PALS if you don't want to speak to nursing or medical staff.

Winetimeisfinetime Thu 16-Oct-08 18:34:50

Or they say " We'll just pop a little tube down and have a quick look " making it sound as if you will hardly notice them doing it !

pumpkinscantdancethetango Thu 16-Oct-08 18:50:33

NL honestly they were lovely, its just me being silly. (its cathartic)

And whey they say "just relax your legs as if you are doing yoga" YOGA???? In what world would you be doing yoga half naked with a bit of metal stuck in your fanjo, except perhaps on some kind of bondage retreat.

haha wine thats true too.

heronsfly Thu 16-Oct-08 19:03:57

And, when some part of you obviously hurts,why do they have to poke it before saying, does it hurt here ?.

LittleMyDancingWithTheDevil Thu 16-Oct-08 19:39:20

this might cheer you up - when I was in hospital at the easily embarrassed age of 12, I had a lovely bed in a small ward on the ground floor. Right by my bed was a huge floor to ceiling window looking out on a small courtyard with a lawn. All very nice.

Nurse came to take temp the old fashioned way. I'm lying on the bed, naked from waist down, thermometer inserted, she wanders off to do something else....then the gardeners turn up to mow the lawn!

there wasn't much I could do, really.

blush

pumpkinscantdancethetango Thu 16-Oct-08 20:17:21

oooooh cringe!!!!!

LittleMyDancingWithTheDevil Thu 16-Oct-08 20:36:16

yes. I don't feel I ever fully recovered from the humiliation, to be honest!

mosschops30 Thu 16-Oct-08 20:40:55

we really dont care, and you just dont notice stuff thats not related to what youre doing.

HTH

midnightexpress Thu 16-Oct-08 20:42:24

Winetime - did you know <little known fact alert> that 'pop' is the most commonly used word (obv excluding the likes of 'the' and 'of') in doctors' surgeries? There was some study done on it a few years ago.

Pop yourself up here.

Pop your knickers off.

Pop your feet in these stirrups.

I'm just going to pop out and then 25 medical students are going to pop in and take a look at your nethers.

Right, I'm just going to pop this in there and it might be a wee bit cold.

Ok pop your clothes back on and pp back next week for your results.

And so on.

So, in answer to the OP, I think it's just that they're trying (and clearly failing grin) to make you feel a bit less nervous/uncomfortable.

expatinscotland Thu 16-Oct-08 20:45:54

'this will feel like a scratch' - no it won't. it will feel like a needle.

when an incision is healing, 'you'll feel like it's stretching'. no, it feels itchy and sore.

'relax' - this isn't relaxing. a margarita on a warm beach is relaxing, this is not.

pumpkinscantdancethetango Thu 16-Oct-08 20:46:04

lmao at pop. im going to hum pop goes the weasel to myself next time to amuse myself

TheCrackFox Thu 16-Oct-08 20:52:02

"you will feel some discomfort" which, IME means this is going to be bloody sore.

pumpkinscantdancethetango Thu 16-Oct-08 21:21:25

yup definetly, as you "wont feel a thing" = discomfort.

so discomfort = fucking sore grin

expatinscotland Thu 16-Oct-08 21:23:17

the ONLY time a doc has ever said 'you won't feel a thing' and it was true is an anaesthetist putting me under GA.

bliss.

all the rest were talking out their arse.

suspookywoo Thu 16-Oct-08 21:27:24

I'm a regualr gynae patient so am quite used to it all now, however, I wasn't quite so happy when I went 2 weeks ago and actually knew the nurse blush. I don't know her well, think school gates type of relationship but was still very embarrasing and I kept imploring her not to look. <<cringetastic>>

FangolinaJolly Thu 16-Oct-08 21:32:29

Aww Spooky.Honestly,most nurses have seen so many fanjos,willys,saggy norks and so on we don't remember....

We are generally appalling with the old euphemisms,though.

I guess it is trying to make stuff less traumatic for people,and alleviating anxiety.

I remember this wonderful bluff Yorkshire guy I nursed though

"Don't you bloody tell me it's gonna be a "Sharp scratch",young lady,it bloody hurts..tell it like it is"

I ususally go for the "You may feel uncomfortable" option.

suspookywoo Thu 16-Oct-08 21:48:21

Oh I know, quite happy to get it out for any medical professional, but not one I actually KNOW FFS blush

Jux Thu 16-Oct-08 22:38:35

You wanna do urodynamics. (No you don't, you really really don't.

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