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how on earth does anyone ever

(40 Posts)
bleurgh Mon 13-Oct-08 19:41:17

stop smoking

I want to so much

I go without for weeks when visiting, up to eight weeks at a time

I stopped with all my babies and bf-ing

I very rarely do it in company

and yet it's my only thing that's me mine, my big flop and relax after they are all in bed as I don't drink so don't have that glass of wine thing

I'm on about ten a day

all you strong people out there -- HOW HOW HOW did you manage

please (beg beg) all top tips welcome

nickytwoooohtimes Mon 13-Oct-08 19:44:47

I stopped. I have a terrible coffee habit now, but I am so glad. It is iNCREDIBLY hard work. You need an iron will and lots of support.
It is so great though, honestly, you feel like you've conquered Everst, you have more cash and you smell really good. Oh, and you won't die so soon, that is good too.
I cut down to 2 a day, though that doesn't suit everyone. I quite totally after a month of 2 a day and haven't looked back despite loving the fags.

Blandmum Mon 13-Oct-08 19:45:24

My mother, who smoked for about 40 years, quit overnight. When I asked her how she had done it she simply said, 'I didn't want to do it any more'

Not wildly helpful I realise smile In the end you have to want to quit more than you want to smoke. You sound as if you have fantastic will power to get through the first awful stages if withdrawing. You 'just' need to want to stop more than the ones you have at the end of the day. Can you do something else that is relaxing? Nice soak in the bath of summat?

MurderousMarla Mon 13-Oct-08 19:47:45

I read Allen Carr's book and smoked while reading it, and by the end - just didn't want to - it opened my eyes completely and I view smoking in a totally different light - changed my life

It's not called the 'easy way' for nothing!

Seriously you won't miss it or regret it

bleurgh Mon 13-Oct-08 19:48:58

No it is helpful -- has a certain clarity! That's what I was thinking -- maybe find another way to relax and still say to dh -- right this is my time leave me alone for 20 mins. But I don't want to start drinking.

Thanks NIcky and congratulations grin I keep imagining my lungs all black and not being with the grandchildren and still I reach out for one. Am so bloody weak.

bleurgh Mon 13-Oct-08 19:50:25

Marla -- I can't imagine this being easy. I've heard of Allen Carr. It really is a life change isn't it -- not being tied in that way to that fix. Which is what it really is.

bleurgh Mon 13-Oct-08 19:51:20

I'm going to bed but checking in the morning. Would love to wake up without that disgusting taste but it's not going to happen tomorrow sad

I need to gird my loins.

CoteDAzur Mon 13-Oct-08 19:51:44

I was exactly like you.

Smoked only with coffee or alcohol. One with morning coffee, then 1-2 with another coffee when not around DD, and more at night after putting DD to bed and having some wine with DH on the terrace. Like you, I was smoking about 10 a day, and like you, I could go days or weeks without smoking.

Then I realized I can die from this and that it is stupid, because I am not even physically addicted to it. I decided to quit because I want to live for DD. I haven't smoked since the beginning of the year.

My top tip is to read WhyQuit until you know it backwards in your last days of smoking.

Good luck!

nickytwoooohtimes Mon 13-Oct-08 19:52:36

You are not weak. Nicotine is incredibly addictive, not to mention all the other crap they add to fags to make them even harder to quit.
For me, my MN time is my time. I shut myself away for an hour every evening. Also, I make sure I have time for a lovely relaxing bubble bath every couple of nights. Those 2 things keep me sane.

brimfull Mon 13-Oct-08 19:53:15

sympathies
it is really really hard but MB is right you have to really want to be a non smoker.
You will always find an excuse for having the odd one if you secretly don't want to give up.
Read Alan Carrs book and see is that helps.
Good luck,it is the best feeling in the world beating an addiction and worth persevering .

MurderousMarla Mon 13-Oct-08 19:53:25

Well, that's half the problem with AC explains - everyone says stopping is SO hard, and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. But the truth is that you are no different to a non-smoker. A non-smoker doesn't need nicotine and tobacco to feel relaxed, or to round off a meal, or whatever - and neither do you.

Allen Carr shows you this and you end up believing it, and it ends up being true.

I don't smoke and I am not sat here highly strung or stressed or needing a cig now DS is in bed. I'm no different from you.

I will admit I had one hellish weekend after my last cigarette but never did I actually want to smoke. On the third day after stopping it was like the sun had come out after a rainstorm.

MurderousMarla Mon 13-Oct-08 19:56:01

It's freedom - never do I think about how many fags I've got, have I got a spare lighter, or do I have money and can I get to a shop, and do I have enough to last till the morning - I feel lighter without all that to think about because I found it so consuming.

gingerninja Mon 13-Oct-08 19:57:49

Allen Carr. Still think about what he says seven years later.

I think part time smokers (I was one) in a way are the worst (in terms of how hard it is to give up) as they don't see it as a 'problem' in quite the same way and their heart isn't in giving up with quite the same passion.

I think you have to be completely commited to giving up. It won't work if you've got any doubts as those little niggling voices will be strong telling you that just having a puff won't hurt.

Good luck. When you're ready it's not nearly as hard as you imagine.

MurderousMarla Mon 13-Oct-08 20:00:03

ginger is right the less you smoke, the more you look forward to each one, too. Fewer cigarettes become almost precious, especially when they're a break away from work/family/whatever. And you know the health risks are not quite so scary so a good reason to stop is somewhat diminished...

When you smoke loads you hate half of the ones you have so psychologically it's easier, I think.

nooOOOoonki Mon 13-Oct-08 20:06:46

I got hypnotised that worked for me

and DH used Alan Carr - and gave up a 30 a day habit over night.

I didn't smoke for 3 years then had a night of smoking the other month, and now know I will never smoke again it was bleeeeeeeeeeeeugggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhh

nooOOOoonki Mon 13-Oct-08 20:08:42

also if you managed to give up for your kids (preg/bf) keep hold of that because they will be influenced by your smoking even more as they get bigger and smoke themselves and it will all be your fault....

(trying the guilt trip technique grin)

AuraofDora Mon 13-Oct-08 20:37:17

..its not easy but something flips in your mind and you just dont want to do it anymore..

i stare at the smoke coming out of people's mouths and it looks so strange like a surreal movie...

to help quit i just kept busy, instead of coffee fag and computer i blush mopped the floor or gathered up everyone for a walk/swim/anything to break fagarette routine..

good luck!

bleurgh Tue 14-Oct-08 03:22:50

Thanks so much for all your replies. Cote and Ginger -- I think that's part of the problem, I don't think of myself as a smoker -- am I nuts? -- because of the part time nature. So that's got to stop. Marla, I agree, I hate the tie of smoking. Are we passing a shop on the way home etc. I'm hoping I will feel that sense of freedom quite quickly. Thanks Nicky for saying I'm not weak! Because that's like an excuse isn't it -- oh I'm weak so I'm allowed. Noonki you have made me grin. Thanks for the advice Aura I wish I could have a mind flip but keeping busy next best thing.

Well to be honest I wasn't actually thinking about giving up right now until I started this thread, I was just fed up and thinking that I'm never ever going to be able to quit this. But you have all made me want to try again. I have about five and I'm going to have those. Then tonight will be my first post-bedtime crash without a cigarette to "look forward" to.

Thankyou

<excited>

bleurgh Tue 14-Oct-08 03:22:50

Thanks so much for all your replies. Cote and Ginger -- I think that's part of the problem, I don't think of myself as a smoker -- am I nuts? -- because of the part time nature. So that's got to stop. Marla, I agree, I hate the tie of smoking. Are we passing a shop on the way home etc. I'm hoping I will feel that sense of freedom quite quickly. Thanks Nicky for saying I'm not weak! Because that's like an excuse isn't it -- oh I'm weak so I'm allowed. Noonki you have made me grin. Thanks for the advice Aura I wish I could have a mind flip but keeping busy next best thing.

Well to be honest I wasn't actually thinking about giving up right now until I started this thread, I was just fed up and thinking that I'm never ever going to be able to quit this. But you have all made me want to try again. I have about five and I'm going to have those. Then tonight will be my first post-bedtime crash without a cigarette to "look forward" to.

Thankyou

<excited>

CoteDAzur Tue 14-Oct-08 08:07:01

I never thought of myself as a smoker, either.

Munch on carrot sticks fir a few days and stop drinking coffee and alcohol for a while. I promise you, you will enjoy them even more as a non-smoker when you don't associate them with smoking.

bleurgh Tue 14-Oct-08 17:17:12

I've done it, last one.

Like the advice about giving up coffee and alcohol for a bit and trying to make everything a whole lot healthier.

Thank you all, if you hadn't responded I wouldn't be doing this now x

smile

CoteDAzur Tue 14-Oct-08 21:33:12

Go for it!

Stay strong. In a couple of weeks, you won't remember ever smoking smile

nowtygaffer Tue 14-Oct-08 22:02:13

Good luck!! I gave up about 12yrs ago and found the hardest bit lasted for about 10 days.

I was also coughing up horrible crap which made me realise how bad it was for me..Every time I was tempted to have another I pictured the horrible crap! I was smoking about 10 a day when I stopped. Hope this helps a bit.

bleurgh Wed 15-Oct-08 07:42:16

thank you nowty

it's all a bit weird and a bit loose endy .. am not weeping with withdrawal yet.. something to look forward to

ErnestTheBavarian Wed 15-Oct-08 07:57:48

don't think like that! You'll talk yourself into feeling withdrawal symptoms. I tried for years to give up. I was lucky. When I found out I was pg something just clicked and I totally lost all desire to smoke, so it was no effort. Aeriously seriously recommend you borrow the Allen Carr book from the library, or even buy it. I can't be much more than the price of a packet of fags anyway-

well done

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