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What is wrong with my 9 week old baby boy!!

(34 Posts)
KatieLouLou Tue 16-Sep-08 17:34:08

I have a nine week old son who has been a nightmare since birth. If I did not have friends and relatives with babies then I think I would have put this down to just being a baby, but I have been told by others that his crying is excessive. I breast fed him for 5 weeks, but he was literally feeding constantly with one feed running into another, and I also could not put him down - he would only sleep on me. This is when I made the decision to change to formula. I started him on Aptamil and it was like a diff baby - I could now leave the house and I knew exactly how much he had fed, so if he cried I knew it was not hunger. This worked for a while and then the screaming started again - ended up in A + E one night as was so bad - the doctor said prob reflux and prescribed Gaviscon Infant. Again, this worked for a few days and then the screaming returned. At six week check doc said he could be cows milk protein intolerant ( I was as a child too). Changed his milk to Nutramigen 1 and again, vast improvement for a few days and then back to square one. I am at the end of my tether now as to what is the matter. He hates going in his pram/ sling and hardly sleeps during the day resulting in him being exhausted by the evening, causing even more crying!!! if anyone has any advice it would be much appreciated. PS. I'm new to this so sorry if I have not used all the abbreviations etc!!smile

NorthernLurker Tue 16-Sep-08 17:44:19

You poor thing! I have to say that I think your friends etc telling you he was crying too much was hugely unhelpful imo! Probably didn't help you feel great did it?
Well done for breastfeeding for so long - that must have taken some determination. To be totally honest the fact that you have tried different milks etc and he is still crying almost suggests to me that it is nothing to do with the milk but could be something else. What sort of delivery did you have? Sometime cranial osteopathy can work wonders with babies who have had a traumatic entry in to the world. Also - the evening thing may be seperate from this issue too. Many people (myself included) find that the evening is the grumpiest hungriest time. My dd2 in particular had a few weeks when she wanted to feed from about 6-10pm! Rather hard on you when you want to eat your tea etc! The most important advice I can offer though is - this too shall pass! Your son is very young and he will be changing and growing before your eyes. You are doing really well and it is not always going to be this hard. smile

Pheebe Tue 16-Sep-08 17:58:55

Is his crying worse after a feed? Does he arch back or fuss on his bottle? Does he bring any or most of his milk back? These would all be signs of reflux/silent reflux. You could go back to the docs, there are other reflux meds that might suit him better if you think thats what it is.

Have you tried 'wearing' him? basically pop him in a sling and carry him with you all day. While he's tiny the closeness might sooth him and be just what he needs. There are lots of threads around on this. Don't worry about setting habits at this stage, he's too small and you need to do whatever it takes to get through for now.

Not an expert but it seems to me that some babies really struggle to adjust to the outside world and need that extra physical closeness to feel safe.

poshtottie Tue 16-Sep-08 18:33:57

Hi, sorry to hear you are having a tough time. I would go back to the doctor and get the HV to come to see you, just to get reassurance that your baby is fine, which I am sure he is.

Definitely try cranial osteopathy, it does help some babies.

I do sympathise as my ds was terribly fussy in the evenings. I started a bath/bedtime routine around six weeks and thankfully he went down by 7pm.

Have a look at this website to see if there is any useful advice askdrsears.com

NorthernLurker Tue 16-Sep-08 21:53:33

BUMP for you!

IAteDavinaForDinner Tue 16-Sep-08 22:05:22

huge sympathies. I was in your shoes a year ago and it was hell on earth.

I agree, try the CO (didn't work for us but was great to feel you're doing something). Also try Dentonox/Infacol to relieve wind, which was the source of most of our trouble.

You need to persevere with slings, but I would be really surprised if you don't get him to warm to it - make sure you put him upright with his tummy to you, and only for a few minutes at a wtime, and walk briskly. I had problems with mine at first but when he finally realised it was a good thing life got easier.

If he sleeps in the car I would suggest trying to get him to sleep in the car if that's an option. Otherwise loads of people swear by swings/rockers. baby massage can help with trapped wind, as can deep hot baths.

Bear in mind not every baby can manage to stay awake for 2 hours - mine was ready for a nap after 45 minutes awake, even first thing in the morning. If he didn't get a sleep he was overtired all day resulting in loads of crying and a hellish evening. A lot of the tiredness was because he simply couldn't nap properly due to terrible wind, which thankfully got better over time.

Please hang on in there and remind yourself it's not your fault and it will get better. I promise that I understand how awful this is - I too had a baby which was vastly different to other people's - thankfully my mum had a tough time with all of us so she could sympathise, although I still think there was something 'wrong' with DS when he was small.

If it's any consolation (it won't be - when i was in your position it felt like I was going to be faced with this misery forever) DS is now a healthy one year old and he sleeps really quite well (he's never slept through but in our book that's no big deal!)

Slickbird Tue 16-Sep-08 22:19:17

You poor thing. Hang in there, I'm sure it will get better.

By way of suggestion, and maybe something to have checked, it could possibly be a compression in his spine, perhaps in his neck or his spine. This is fixable and I only mention it as your situation sounds quite similar to something a friend went through. Her baby boy fed and fed and fed, but he wasn't actually latching on properly because he couldn't lift his chin enough, he also hated being in his car seat. He screamed for ages during this period. But when he got checked by her FIL who is a chiropractor, and in fact, I think he might have been xrayed, and it showed that the long labour had taken its toll and there was a compression in his neck. He did get gentle physio and is fine now. Like I say, it might not be that, but maybe something worth checking. Good luck. xx

lennastarr Tue 16-Sep-08 22:20:53

yes he is only tiny...sounds like you need to give your mates a miss for a few weeks to let you and the baby get into a routine...the way YOU like it.stay in your pyjamas for the day,SWITCH the phone on off...lie with your baby and enjoy him..they are only like this once believe me ive got 3.
if you are having a hectic life,babies hate it,they just wanna be with their mummy,the more people i listened to,the harder it was.just chill,and he will chill with you...xx

wilkos Tue 16-Sep-08 22:26:02

my dd was pretty awful for the first twelve weeks, crying and crying and generally unsettled.

we did three things that may or may not have helped:

firstly we realised she was most hungry in the evening when my milk supply was at its lowest so gave her a bottle at about 6pm (not an ideal solution i know but heck we were desperate and she was starving)

secondly - took her to see a cranial osteopath who identified that she had neck and head pain from getting into a difficult position during delivery. she slept for about four hours straight after the first session so think that gave her some relief

thirdly - realised that in the evening when the crying was at its worst all she needed other than the bottle was to be put down in a quiet room to sleep! up till that point I had been rocking, cuddling, walking about with her, giving more milk, trying to divert her attention from screaming with toys (you name it we did it) when all she wanted was for us to f* off so she could get some sleep. poor thing was exhausted from our efforts!

whether it was one of those things/ all of them/ just her natural development I dont know, but at 12 weeks exactly she woke up with a smile and has been lovely and easygoing ever since.

but i will NEVER forget those first hellish twelve weeks. my hart goes out to you, it will get better I promise smile

wilkos Tue 16-Sep-08 22:26:55

my dd was pretty awful for the first twelve weeks, crying and crying and generally unsettled.

we did three things that may or may not have helped:

firstly we realised she was most hungry in the evening when my milk supply was at its lowest so gave her a bottle at about 6pm (not an ideal solution i know but heck we were desperate and she was starving)

secondly - took her to see a cranial osteopath who identified that she had neck and head pain from getting into a difficult position during delivery. she slept for about four hours straight after the first session so think that gave her some relief

thirdly - realised that in the evening when the crying was at its worst all she needed other than the bottle was to be put down in a quiet room to sleep! up till that point I had been rocking, cuddling, walking about with her, giving more milk, trying to divert her attention from screaming with toys (you name it we did it) when all she wanted was for us to f* off so she could get some sleep. poor thing was exhausted from our efforts!

whether it was one of those things/ all of them/ just her natural development I dont know, but at 12 weeks exactly she woke up with a smile and has been lovely and easygoing ever since.

but i will NEVER forget those first hellish twelve weeks. my hart goes out to you, it will get better I promise smile

StarlightMcKenzie Tue 16-Sep-08 22:29:49

Message withdrawn

wilkos Tue 16-Sep-08 22:29:54

oops blush mnet so slow tonight pressed button twice!

agree with pheebe BTW, some babies just need a bit more time to adjust

handbagqueen Tue 16-Sep-08 22:35:44

My DD2 was really similar. she cried constantly unless she was being fed or sleeping while being held. she didn't nap at all during the day and fed hourly day and night.

We took her to a cranial oestopath and it was amazing. When we got her home after the visit she was like a different baby and we had our first meal together since she was born as she lay on her mat happily.

We went for 2 vists and she was all sorted out. Its worth a try.

emma1977 Tue 16-Sep-08 22:38:48

Sounds like me and ds at 9 weeks- constant screaming, couldn't put him down, feeding was a constant fight, didn't sleep for more than 7 hours in a 24 hour period.

He had really bad reflux and I strongly suspect from your story that your dc has too. Gaviscon and a change in formula may not be enough to keep it under control. and he may need extra help.

Go back to your GP and have a chat. My son improved a lot on ranitidine and domperidone as well as gaviscon. He was also much better being propped upright for a while after feeds and sleeping on his side instead of his back. He was also being very overstimulated from our efforts to comfort his screams, and eventually settled much better to sleep in a quiet dark room all alone instead of endless hours pacing while he cried.

Good luck and hang on in there- It is really hard.

misi Tue 16-Sep-08 23:03:12

exactly like my son, my ex wasn't producing enough milk we found out after a while so he was always hungry, changed him to formula, carried on, changed to goats milk formula, crying improved but not much, had symptoms of casien intolerance (the protien in cows milk) and lactose intolerance (the sugar in milk also found in lesser quantities in goats), swapped to soya formula and his crying stopped within a couple of days. Our GP went mad, said soya was not good enough etc, but this was soya formula especially for babies, and it worked, he started gaining weight instead of loosing it, stopped crying, was very content and sleep better, and at 4 years old now, he is tall (114cm) lean but musclular (3st exactly) and is thriving, no drugs just nutritional changes that allowed his body to digest food. he is no longer casien or lactose intolerant as one of his favourite snacks is cheese and fresh tomatoes (often straight off the plant hmm)

KatieLouLou Wed 17-Sep-08 09:13:18

Thanks everyone for all your help - what a difference it makes when you are feeling pretty low . For all those who suggested cranial osteopathy, I am taking him for a session at 5pm today so I will update you all on how I get on. My labour was long - my waters broke at 10.30pm on the Sunday night and he was not born until 6am on the Tuesday. I was having contractions the whole time. It was a normal delivery with no intervention, but the cord had been round his neck and tummy and his heart rate dipped considerably during late labour. With regards to the formula, when I was a child I was allergic to both cow's milk and goat's milk and consequently was fed soya formula - I did not have dairy until i was about 10!! However I know that these days they are very reluctant to give babies soya milk as it is high in sugar or something(?). But I am still unsure on whether it is the milk or not. I am pretty sure that he does have reflux as he brings up milk immediately after a feed and sometimes up to 3 hours later!!! The doctor told me to stop using the gaviscon as 'he shouldn't need it with the nutramigen', however he quite clearly is not keeping it down! I have tried to add it to the formula against the doctor's advice, however it blocks the teat up so much that he is sucking and nothing is coming out! One thing I will say is that he is gaining weight - which I feel so fortunate about as I know there are lots of people out there whose little ones are not.

weblette Wed 17-Sep-08 09:20:06

Good luck with the co, it made a huge difference with all of mine, especially dd who experienced a long labour. Hope he's more settled soon.

TheProvincialLady Wed 17-Sep-08 09:29:17

I think your doctor is mistaken. I am no expert but dairy allergy and reflux are totally separate and if your DS has both then he will need treating for both IYSWIM? You can give the gaviscon in a syringe before you feed - we found as you did that in the bottle it just clogs up the teat.

pucca Wed 17-Sep-08 09:32:32

I had loads of problems with my dd at around that age, they kept saying colic but i was having none of it.

It turned out she was lactose intolerant, switched to SMA LF (lactose free) and she was a complete different baby! she stayed on this for 12 weeks then i switched back and was fine after that.

How are his stools?

Is there a pattern to his upset?

pucca Wed 17-Sep-08 09:35:00

You can buy small tins of SMA LF from boots, it is expensive, but if you wanted to try it first? then if it does help your ds (you will notice after only a couple of feeds, i did!) you can go to your GP and get it free on prescription.

likessleep Wed 17-Sep-08 09:39:11

My DS was the same for the first twelve weeks and had colic and reflux.
He used to fall asleep (upright on us) and then a couple of minutes later would wake up screaming (and a real in pain high pitched screaming). The Gaviscon worked by thickening the milk, but we were also prescribed Ranitidine, which neutralised the tummy acid (which is what was causing the pain). 1 day after starting Ranitidine and DS was like a different baby, sleeping and much more comfy (although still being projectile sick between feeds).

Gaviscon works for thickening, but I don't think (and I could be wrong) that it does anything to counterbalance tummy acid, which could be what is causing the pain.

My Doctor was ace, but I know that some are of the theory that with reflux, unless they aren't gaining weight, not to intervene. If you think your LO is in pain with the reflux/acid, I'd suggest going back to the Doctor. Yes reflux is a normal process, but there are things available to help with the pain (if you think he is in pain).

Good luck x

psychomum5 Wed 17-Sep-08 09:43:56

cranial ostopathy is fab, I thoroughly recommend it. you might find that the long labour and cord etc going round him means that he has area's that have got 'stuck', hence the crying and screaming.

whan I was pregnant with DS1 I had a car accident at 28wks. I hit the steering wheel with my bump and broke my ribs, and also (unknown to me at the time jarred baby). when he was born, he screamed. and screamed. and screamed. he literally did not stop for 5wks...he even whimpered in his sleep.

I took him for treatment, and whatever they did that first session.....I will never know as I was too tired to take it in, but my god, I could have snogged the woman after....he slept solid for 3hrs after, silently!

it took about 7wks before I would say he was 'normal' and like my first three babies, but he slept after the first and continued to, pllus feeding got much easier aswell.

oh, a baby swing helped too. I think he needed to be slightly curved rather than flat all the time. in fact, for about a month after he slept in the swing at night too.......padded out and cosy, but he was fine and we all got to sleep (the whole house this timewink).

as for the intolerance and reflux......

he may also be suffering 'silent reflux', which is where the milk some halfway up but not out completely, as does acid, and so causes a heart-burn feeling for them.

now, if you suffered heartburn at all during pregnancy you will know how much it hurts, and with babies, imagine feeling that pain and not knowing why or how.....

my DD3 suffered from severe reflux 8and* silent reflux. awful, and frustrating. when the docs explained why and what tho, I was able to handle it as I understood IYGWIM.

if it is that, you will still need to use the gaviscon (altho try to give separately at the end of the feed). it helps thicken on top of the nilk, therefore helping stop the reflux as it is too think to rise (not sure if that is completely correct, but it is as I understood it from how it was explained to me).

not sure on the best milks no to suggest.......my children had soya milks and hypo-allergenic ones.

good luck, and I hope things start to settle with him soon.

MatBackFeck Wed 17-Sep-08 09:53:44

my heart goes out to you - this is such a horrible thing. So many have been though it and you will look back and see this as a very short period of time but while you are in it it is hell. That said, it sounds normal as in a lot of people have been through this. But possibly the reflux (which is very common) is what needs to be addresses. In our case we found the CO amazing for ds1 and Infacol and swaddling (very tightly) did the trick in the evenings for ds2. Try everything just so you feel you are doing something but don't get too hung up on what is working and what isn't, it will slowly get better anyway as his little digestive system etc adapts to the outside world. Try and get out for plenty of walks - this REALLY helps - they sleep better and you get some sanity back. Even if he screams when you put him in the pram or sling I promise he will settle once you get going briskly. Remember you can get teats with bigger holes if the gaviscon is blocking them up. Keep going, you are doing really well and I promise you, one day you will look back and, if not laugh, manage a wry smile.

mummc2 Wed 17-Sep-08 10:36:02

Oh my god this just seems like what happened with my dd. I breast fed she would be what felt like constantly on and feeding and if wasnt she would be crying. I tried for 3 weeks but when my husband went back to work i couldnt cope was constantly knackered as also have dd age 3 so no sleep in day. She was referred to hospital thought she may be allergic to cows milk protein or lactose. They changed her milk to sma lf and helped alot but only cut episodes by 50%. I had previously tried many other remedies and milks and improved for a few days then got worse again. Hospital results showed nothing wrong with her!!! Kept her on sma lf and just kept patient and it slowly improved by age of 6 months.
She would scream like in pain, she would trump all the time and was opening bowels 8 times a day!!! so something wasnt right. The only thing i think is maybe her tummy wasnt developed fully and was really sensitive.

Stick with it hopefully will improve ( my dd now 10 months and eats everything in site, not keen on milk still though-one bottle in morning and one at nite)

I did consider baby craneostophy ( dont know if spelt right) maybe that could help you apparently sometimes they put their body out of alignment when come through birth canal and this corrects it. My friend did it and said fantastic. GOOD LUCK

mummc2 Wed 17-Sep-08 10:44:15

just read other threads good luck at 5pm

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