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Quick fix STRESS relief?

(14 Posts)
unicorn Wed 19-Jan-05 19:57:51

I have never been what you would describe as a 'laid back' person, but since having kids I just feel constantly stressed.

Ds (3 next week) is very active, and nearly always having an accident, or disobeying virtually everything I ask him to do etc..so I am permanently tense.

Anybody got some tips as to how I can 'chill out' a bit more... or else calm down a bit when his challenging behaviour gets too much?

doggiewalker Wed 19-Jan-05 20:04:47

Count to ten ! Or just make sure he is safe before going to a different room. How about trying to get a massage now and again. Also, burn lavender oils or candles, these can help you feel more relaxed.

WigWamBam Wed 19-Jan-05 20:05:29

I used to go to the bottom of the garden and scream. Lets out a whole load of tension (although the neighbours will think you're barking).

Lavender oil or Bach Rescue Remedy are good quick stress-busters too.

Lonelymum Wed 19-Jan-05 20:08:09

Gosh I wish I knew the answer to this one! I have four children and one or another is being difficult or demanding at any one time it seems. Eg, ds2 has just cried hysterically because I went through his drawer and threw out some socks with broken elastic. I started to laugh but then felt callous.

I ignore them (or try to) when they really start getting to me. I think that sometimes works because some of the behaviour is only there in the hope of getting a reaction. If you can work out when your ds is behaving badly just to get a reaction and you can ignore him, that might help.

Otherwise, I am waiting for other Mners to post so I can benefit from their wisdom.

unicorn Wed 19-Jan-05 20:11:31

thanks all..
love the idea of massages etc.. but time/money etc...

I wish I wasn't a 'reactive' person, but alas I always have been, and it is very, very easy to wind me up...
The kids sussed this early.

Maybe I should be asking - how do you stop reacting- if you are that sort of person?!!!

keziah Wed 19-Jan-05 20:12:02

I second the bach flower remedies. I use impatiens and cherry plum - I just get SO wound up sometimes!! Also make sure you drink plenty of water as I just read that a glass of water can calm an irritable person! Really! I'm sure it works for stress too.

SPARKLER1 Wed 19-Jan-05 20:22:49

Time out is the number one remedy for me. Just 15 mins to the local shop is amazingly head clearing. Or a walk with kids is a good one for you all.

Lonelymum Wed 19-Jan-05 20:23:09

I have tried playing music I like (I gave up listening when I had my first baby and he just babbled over it) but they still babble over it and annoy me more!

bellababe Wed 19-Jan-05 20:28:44

I get really really stressed too. Sometimes I scream, and I mean scream, at the children because I just snap. Sometimes I deal with it. One way is - although I don't put the telly on much for them - put it on to shut them up, then leave the room and go somewhere cool and quiet, even if it's just to sit on the floor in the hallway and take big deep breaths, and really savour being on your own for a minute.
About a year ago, another MNer advised me to make sure I had my own time to have b'fast and a cuppa on my own in the mornings and it is the best piece of advice I have ever been given. I could get up 20mins later than I do, but those extra 20mins allow me that really sacred time alone and in control, and it really starts the day off on the right foot.

unicorn Wed 19-Jan-05 20:32:55

totally agree bellab..
when I get 'thrown' into the day, with barely time for a p/t or shower, I am inevitably starting on the wrong foot.

Problem being as soon as I get up, kids hear me (am not That noisy!) and are 'in my face'

I find it very difficult to get my own 'space' iykwim....= stress!!!!

Lonelymum Wed 19-Jan-05 20:35:30

I like the end of the day to destress - am doing it now on Mumsnet! Dh often askes me, why, if I am so tired, I don't go to bed, but I want to have that hour or two after the oldest has gone to bed to just be me.

Frizbe Wed 19-Jan-05 20:38:34

camomile tea is supposed to be good, read on here a while ago, that someone popped a teabag in the bath to calm their little one and get them to sleep! have to say after reading that I mentioned to an insomniac friend and he tried it and it worked, he slept the whole night! so must be good for stress releif right?

unicorn Wed 19-Jan-05 21:34:04

frizbe..wow... I have never heard that one before.!!!!!
I shall be out buying camomile teabags tomorrow - not just for the kids, but for me I think!!!

HunkerMunker Wed 19-Jan-05 21:41:34

If you get wound up, create some new 'swear words' - things like "Oh for pancake's sake, you giant sausagenose!" Or try "PIGFLAPS" when you drop something/break something/hurt yourself.

You end up venting in a whole new way and it helps (and if you're really creative, it'll make you (and the children) laugh - great stressbuster!).

I am very daft, in case you were wondering

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