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Problem/Dependent Drinkers and Alcoholics (recovering or active) Support V

(691 Posts)
kokeshi Thu 22-May-08 00:12:41

Welcome to the thread, the purpose of this is to give anyone who is having any trouble with their drinking, a safe place to come and post about it honestly and without judgement.

There are many of us that use the thread for support and encouragement: some in recovery, others just needing a place to share about their worries. It's been going on in one form of another for a while now and has helped many people.

Thank you to all of those who have kept it going thus far, and welcome to anyone who has decided the time has come to ask for help.

Everybody's welcome, no matter what stage your drinking is at.

Jump right in, the water's fine

kokeshi Thu 22-May-08 00:17:07

PLease direct the stragglers over here wink

dandycandyjellybean Thu 22-May-08 11:39:09

I'm an 'on holiday' straggler...can I join in? Just grabbing a quick few mins to say hi, haven't had chance to read much on the thread, the computer is in the games room so it's not very conducive, but have managed to bag a couple of mins of privacy. Hope you are all doing okay, think of you every night when taking first drink...hmm. Believe it or not i still feel really crap, has now progressed to laryngitis (sp?) and I can barely talk. Bloody, bloody, bloody. However, keep looking at other threads on health and reminding myself how lucky I am. Will read / post properly when i get home tomorrow night. {{{hugs}}} all

PurpleOne Fri 23-May-08 00:04:09

I'm still here - though gearing up for another school holiday.

Get well soon HBM.

I am so looking forward to 4th June for my appt with RDAS.
Made a head start with my OU stuff.

And looking forward to the BH weekend, where it is very likely that I will be getting totally ratarsed for the last time.

Hope everyone is well x

jellibabe Fri 23-May-08 07:22:59

Morning, just getting an early post in before the kids get up.

This Saturday's party at my sisters is cancelled (new kitchen not arrived or something annoying like that). Am a bit disappointed/relieved had psyched myself up to test my resolve.

Stripteasle you mentioned being given a bottle of wine and feeling like it was an unexploded bomb. The thought of having one glass of wine is like that for me. Finding it easier every week but worry that one glass and everything would go haywire.

Hairybiker hope your having a good holiday. At least everytime you have a drink it reinforces the feeling that it's not as great as it's cracked up to be smile.

Very motivated just now. Life has been so much better without alcohol - even the bad bits. Moreover every day which goes by without a drink is an 'Up Yours' to my xp grin.

Stripteasle Fri 23-May-08 07:35:26

Hi Jelli- good to see you. Hi Purple.
Its been rather quiet on here hasn't it? I havn't been able to get on the internet for some reason, but it seems ok at this hour!

Its really hard, that 'I'll just have one glass thing' isn't it? For some reason, that was such a persistent 'lie' i told myself. Never was one glass, never. Its that saying that Hairybiker wrote down, on the definition of insanity- doing the same thing and expecting different outcomes.

Hope everyone is ok. x

BrassicMonkey Fri 23-May-08 10:11:18

Thanks for starting this new thread Kokeshi. I didn't notice we were so close to the old one closing. I've had a busy week so haven't been around much on FB or here.

DS fell over and hit his head on Wednesday morning and got sent home from school. I couldn't find a babysitter so I had to miss my group. It was nice to have a day off from it, but I feel like I haven't done my best by not making all of the sessions. It couldn't be helped though, and I was back at the hospital yesterday for CBT and I'm back at my group again today. There is no group on Monday because of the bank holiday, and half term covers the next 3 group sessions, so I might miss those too - just depends on whether DS's dad is home from work in time.

Sorry to hear you're still not feeling well HBM. Crap timing, what with your holiday.

Enjoy the weekend everyone smile

gerbra Fri 23-May-08 18:31:35

Hello to all - how's everyone doing?

Hairyb you're back home tonight aren't you? Hope the lurgie didn't piss on the whole holiday - did you have a break of some sorts?

Brassic hope DS is okay? Don't worry about missing the group, it's only one session and it couldn't be helped. Things sound like they're going well though in terms of the drinking?

I haven't posted much recently as I've not been feeling like I've got much to offer! I have, however, been lurking drunkenly during the latter part of the week and watching some of the other threads - the full moon seems to struck this week !

I 'allowed' myself to drink on Wednesday for the footie and that carried over into Thursday..and inevitably the long weekend...

From this, I'm thinking I can manage no drinking if I put a blanket ban on it during the week, but if I let myself drink one night, it will be nigh-on impossible for me to go back to not drinking the following night. I do think that's a bit odd though as I can do from Sunday to Monday without too much of a problem. Maybe its a question of having a rigid structure and not deviating from it?

...I am still aware, though, all the above could be one massive slice of denial ... still working that one out!

God that was a ramble- hope it doesn't make too boring reading grin

Hope everyone has a fantastic weekend

Gerbra x

lackaDAISYcal Fri 23-May-08 21:27:40

a quick hello to bookmark the new thread. not much time to catch up, RL has been getting in the way this week!

had a tough week emotionally with an old friend staying. She and her DP drank every night they were here and I had a glass of wine with them, but feel really crap about it. I stopped at two small glasses last night, but really felt like I could just keep on going. I guess my drinking is only under control in so far as the pregnancy is making me control it. Am very worried about what will happen after the baby is born. I'm back at the mother and baby psych unit next week, so I'll tell my consultant how hard things have been. My iron levels are rock bottom as well, so that probably isn't helping with my mood.

Had a really hard day today depression-wise (probably a come down after this week), but it was DS's birthday party so had to put on a brave face. It was OK in the end, but I am sooo glad today is over.

sorry, that wasn't short, and was very me me me blush

Will hopefully get the chance for a proper catch up soon.

hbm, I hope you feel better soon, but that feeling poorly hasn't ruined your holiday too much.

has paperchain been back on line since Monday? I came into that very late; too late to do or say anything constructive. I do hope that she is OK.

dandycandyjellybean Fri 23-May-08 22:26:11

you are all such lovely, lovely people for thinking of me. yes had lovely break in a lot of ways, ds slept in with gorgeous mil, who let me have lie in til at least 8.30 evey morning!!!!!! fecking fab!!!!! we all got on really well for saying there was 10 of us, and it was a lovely break, I just felt totally shite physically all week. Still can't speak very well, and am coughing till I puke. me feels the doc bekons....??? going on too long now, can't look after dh/ds properly like this. Still haven't had chance to read thread yet properly, but will. Thanks for missing me, and will post tomorrow when have had chance to read/absorb.. love ya guys.

jellibabe Sat 24-May-08 07:31:20

I am so glad you are all posting. Was beginning to wander into paranoid territory.

Kokeshi made my own pilgrimage to ikea yesterday and came back with half a ton of candles.

Gerbra and Stripteasle <waves>.

Brassic your are doing so well on the alcohol front. Is there anywhere local you could go to for support if you can't make your meetings during the summer?

Daisy do you have any idea what sex the baby is and have you thought of any names?

Hairybiker glad your having a great holiday. Sounds like one of those ones to look back on and smile.

Not much to say on the alcohol front apart from not drinking is definitely helping on the finance front. Didn't think it would as have always tried to keep the cost as low as possible (special offers etc).

Stripteasle Sat 24-May-08 09:36:52

HI everyone.

Hi hairy- nice to see you back- hope you do get to feel better soon though.

I havn't got my car- its at the garage as I put petrol in it the other day (its a diesel). Can't remember doing it, but it has become apparant thats what happened. I live in a small semi-rural village with crap public transport links to anywhere, so am pretty stuck for the time being. But hey ho, may get a lift to the shops today if I'm lucky!

Hope everyone is well.

gerbra Sat 24-May-08 23:05:11

DP has been away on a 'boys night' tonight and have spent the evening watching eurovision with mum and the M&S dine in for 2 deal.

Was so nice, although she's depressed at the mo and that always make me sad (I can deal with it if it's me, but anyone else I care about - Nooooooo). Also told me some stuff about her childhood I'd really rather not have heard - but there you go.

Now am off to 'chat' to ask probably a very ignorant question, but has puzzled me tonight!

Hope everyone's well

Gerbra xx

gerbra Sat 24-May-08 23:22:34

I don't know if I'll regret posting this tomorrow...but DP and I have decided we'd rather not have kids shock. Is it shock? It is isn't it...

I said I had no kids when I first started posting, but since then had name changed, so don't know if that came up, I actually don't think it did. It never seemed relevant for me to mention on this thread or I would have done...until now that is!

Told mum today and asked her if she was upset, and she said yes sad. (My older sister is certainly too late to have kids now and there are just 2 of us). Trouble is you can't make these decisions to keep your family happy can you hmm?

I do worry about myself and the reasons why I (we) don't want kids, I'd fill the house with animals if I could, but why is the thought of kids such a no-no to me?

Sorry for the ramble, but it's been quite a lot to digest over the last few days, and although I do feel I'm following my feelings, it feels wrong and I feel bad - on a superficial level, does this make me ineligible for MN?

Shit -so aware this doesn't constitute a 'drink' issue, but just needed to offload as discussion on this subject has been heavy the last few days...

Gerbra x
(please anwser just to say anything so I won't feel paranoid when I log in tomorrow!!)

gerbra Sat 24-May-08 23:45:39 one's bloomin' answered my question on chat - either everyone knows and I'm obviously too supid to bother to explain to, or no one knows the answer ..........

It has actually confused me!

Night night all - off to bed, will probably wake up tomorrow and go 'OH NO' when I remember what I posted. There's something about (really) personal posts that feels blush and [relief] at the same time...

gebra x

iwillNOTletthisbeatme Sat 24-May-08 23:54:32

ive been sober for 3 dayssmile

jellibabe Sun 25-May-08 08:13:26

Well done Iwillnot that's brilliant.!! smile.

Gerbra I hope you follow your own feelings. It's hard not to be influenced by other people but it's important to do what's right for you. To use that old cliche 'It's your life'. Sure there are loads of childfree families on MN - keep posting grin. xx

gerbra Sun 25-May-08 09:16:41

Thanks Jellibabe smile
gerbra x

Stripteasle Sun 25-May-08 09:59:18

HI Gerbra- you don't have to have children do you? It doesn't mean you're some sort of freak- I have a number of friends who don't have children, and my sister chose not to have them. Why are you worried that you don't want to?

Like Jelli said, its your choice, your life.
Stop being so hard on yourself again lass.

IWillnot- thats brilliant- how are you?

DutchOma Sun 25-May-08 10:01:09

So pleased for you

gerbra Sun 25-May-08 10:56:20

Sorry Iwillnot - I missed that - well done you grin

Hi Stripteasle - I think I feel bad as my mum won't be a grandmother and she said that made her sad. BUT, she also said that's not the point, and it has to be our decision about our lives.

We may change our minds, although I think it's pretty likely that we won't.

grin re I'm not some sort of freak!!

Better get back to work - another working bank holiday weekend - boo! Am really looking forward to our break at the end of June...

Hope everyone's doing well today and having a happy weeekend smile

Gerbra x

jellibabe Mon 26-May-08 07:16:32

It's a beautiful sunny day here - will be spending most of it in the garden doing my best Charlie Dimmock impersonation. Stripteasle have you dug out your beige swimsuit? So far I have resisted the temptation to wear shorts as I don't want to frighten the neighbours. Is there such a colour as fluorescent white?grin

Gerbra don't feel bad about your mum, she got her own turn at making this choice.

Just to update you on my Mum. She is fine. I spoke to her boyfriend who told me she is getting treatment everyday and that a recent xray should that her ankle is healing smile. He has been staying with her everday (whew).

Stripteasle Mon 26-May-08 08:46:28

hI Jelli- good news about your mum.

Around 2 months ago I went to try on swimsuits, the horror of which pretty much killed any plans to buy at that point. However, I am feeling suitably brave enough to go for it again.
Any tips, because i am very tall, 6", and 32 HH bust- Bravissimo swimsuits aren't long enough. However, as soon as I get my car back- some tit put petrol in my diesel car...oh...that would have been me then...I will stride forth, and get a swimsuit.

Lovely day here too!

lackaDAISYcal Mon 26-May-08 20:58:30


gerbra.....i don't even think it's relevant that you don't have children (although I did briefly wonder how you found MN <nosy>)

I know a few couples who don't have children and have chosen not to, and some single female friends who have decided likewise. I'm not sure I would have chosen to have three children, or even if I would have had any if I hadn't got pregnant by accident with DS. My life was on a very different tack until that point.

jelli, that's good about your mum's ankle. I hope it's back to full strength soon.

teasle, am envy at your height. Being only 5'2" I have the opposite problem; things are usually too long in the body for me! That aside, have you tried Figleaves?

lackaDAISYcal Mon 26-May-08 20:59:13

ps, whatever you do, don't google "tall busty swimsuits" shock

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