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A serious question about ds's willie..........! (Sorry)

(67 Posts)
collision Mon 27-Dec-04 18:30:28

A friend of Dh's was telling him about his own son who is 4 and how he had to go to hospital for an operation on his willie. It was to do with the foreskin, I think, because it wasnt pulling back properly and it needed operating on.

DH became concerned about DS1 who is 2.8yrs and so today we asked the paediatrician about it. She said that for the next 20 days we have to put him in the bath and gently pull the skin back (eeeeeeek!!) and put olive oil on it. We have to try and do this twice a day.

DH and I have already had a row about it as DH says that hurts him to think about it! (MEN!!)

Is this right? I have NEVER heard of this before but the Doctor said that his willie was quite closed up and that more parents should be aware of this and pull the skin back when they are younger.

I have 3 brothers and I am sure I would have known about it!! Feel a bit silly really. At least none of you know me!! Advice please!!

emMerryChristmastmg Mon 27-Dec-04 18:34:41

GP said that about DS1 willy a few times.

He's now nearly 6 and it opens much more than it used to without any operations. I think he's sorted it out himself IYKWIM

mishiclaus Mon 27-Dec-04 18:35:57

to be honest i was told that were not to pull the foreskin back as its quite tender...but obviously a dr knows better than me....i also woudlnt feel comfortable doing there anyway your ds can do it and u supervise? just because he will know what hurts

TracyK Mon 27-Dec-04 18:36:10

what age do u start pulling fskin back?

Demented Mon 27-Dec-04 18:36:44

I don't know but I remember asking my HV when DS1 was around 3 about what should be done with his foreskin and she said leave it alone. I think there was a thread on MN not long after that said when they were able to do the pulling back and cleaning for themselves it was a good time to encourage it. We now remind DS1 (almost six) once or twice a week to give it a clean. However he doesn't have any problems with the skin so would imagine the advice may have been different if it was tight or something.

ChristmasCracker Mon 27-Dec-04 18:37:49

Bloody hell how i you meant to know about these things ?

Have never checked ds's willy.

collision Mon 27-Dec-04 18:39:22

That is just how I felt Xmas Cracker! Am freaked out and no one ever told me this info!! I really dont want to go fiddling about with it!!

ChristmasCracker Mon 27-Dec-04 18:43:13

LOL collision, i am getting quite terrifeid at the mo at the thought of potty training Ds, i mean it's just not the same as the dd's, they just got on with it.

Demented Mon 27-Dec-04 18:43:50

LOL, I sent DH into the bathroom with DS1, then aged just over five, for a man to man talk about keeping willies clean!

DS1 was in the shower with me this morning and he said "hold on a minute I need to clean my willie" <shudder> had to resist the urge to shout 'put that away'!

Demented Mon 27-Dec-04 18:46:35

Nutty, don't worry too much about the potty training, boys more or less get on with it too. I had horrible visions of having to hold it for them at toilets but it's not been as bad as that.

ChristmasCracker Mon 27-Dec-04 18:48:31

PMSL thats exacty what i had imagined too

StuartC Mon 27-Dec-04 18:51:49

Boys of that age shouldn't have the foreskin retracted.
Collision - are you from USA? I believe many doctors there do not know how to cope with uncircumcised boys.
LEAVE IT ALONE - you can cause damage.
The boy's own body will allow retraction when it is ready - when he is old enough.

sallyhollyberry Mon 27-Dec-04 19:01:05

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OhComeLetUsADiorHim Mon 27-Dec-04 19:14:56

Actually Stuart, my gp said the same to us a few weeks ago, so I think you were a little over zealous in your post Typical man...'leave my manhood alone'!

Collision, we have to do the same for our ds, as his winkle was ballooning when he had a wee, and he was complaining that it hurt. He is 3y 7m. You do not retract the foreskin, as everyone else quite rightly says, because it will not go completely back at this stage. However, we have to push it back a little, to make the skin stretch. My gp likened it to my tuumy skin stretching when I was pg. He said that the hole was not wide enough for the wee to come out easily, and that he might get infections, which would then require a circumcision.

Anyway, the thought of it all makes me a little squeamish, but ds does not seem to mind, and he is weeing more easily already.


Christmassbee Mon 27-Dec-04 19:29:01

Message withdrawn

DelGirlsRingAreYouListening Mon 27-Dec-04 19:41:57

In one of my 1st nanny jobs {working for a celeb but won't tell you who) I looked after her 2 boys who were 6 & 7 at the time. She always made, well it was routine for them to pull back the foreskin to clean it underneath. They never seemed to have a problem doing it as far as I know but maybe they were just used to it.

StuartC Tue 28-Dec-04 06:42:22

I'll ignore the "Typical man" comment and offer the advice of the American Acadamy of Pediatrics....aap
There is some more information here
I remember the separation process happening to myself (age not remembered, possibly around 7) - it was worrying, because it had never been discussed and I wasn't sure what was going on - but it felt "right". I think the whole separation process took a couple of weeks.
I cringe at the thought of the damage which would be caused by forcing a foreskin retraction before the time was right.

heavenlyghost Tue 28-Dec-04 06:58:32

I agree with StuartC ... leave that willie alone!
When DS was 3 I noticed his foreskin ballooned when doing a wee and I had read somewhere that this was a sign of a tight foreskin. I took him to the doctor who didn't even look at it, just said, "Leave it alone, a foreskin shouldn't be retracted till at least the age of 4".
Sure enough at 4ish, when in the bath one evening, DS discovered for himself that his willie did this amazing thing, "Look at what I can do with my willie Mummy!" <<shudder at the memory>>
I had to rearrange my face from an expression of horror to a smile and say, "That's nice dear!" or something to that effect.
At that point DH and DS had a man to man talk about how to clean a willie and DS does whatever he is supposed to do at the end of bathtime ...
I have read that foreskins can be terribly damaged if they are retracted too early.
And quite frankly, there is no way I would have felt comfortable with fiddling about with DS's willie and olive oil twice a day AT ALL .... eeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwww!

singsong Tue 28-Dec-04 11:50:06

collision can I just ask did your dh become concerned only because his friend's son has a willie problem or was your ds having some kind of irritation/pain? If your ds hasn't had any symptoms then why try to correct something that's not a problem to him? Personally I believe that age 2.8 is too early to start messing with the foreskin, age 4 is a bit different. You may find this site useful \link{}/Phimosis (Tight Foreskin)}

singsong Tue 28-Dec-04 11:52:25

Try again sorry!
Phimosis (Tight Foreskin)

Gobbledigoose Tue 28-Dec-04 11:54:21

OMG, this thread scares me!! I've got 3 boys - HELP! I've never done anything with their little soldiers and noone has ever told me to!

I'm leaving well alone unless one of them complains of pain and then I'm afraid it's a job for dh!

lockets Tue 28-Dec-04 11:54:54

Message withdrawn

OhComeLetUsADiorHim Tue 28-Dec-04 18:33:20

Well, my gp told us to do this, so I will listen to his advice! No disrespect to anyone. I took ds to the gp, purely because he was complaining that his winkle hurt. I didn't/don't want to do what he suggested, and he did specify that we should not actually try to make it fully retract, just try to stretch the skin. He said that it was extremely common, and that most of the time it sorts itself out. However, he had a look at ds, and made his recommendation.

Was only joking about the 'man' comment StuartC, but, unless you are a gp, I will ignore you, even though you have an appendage.

OhComeLetUsADiorHim Tue 28-Dec-04 18:37:01

Singsong - thanks for the link. It is very reassuring about the ballooning. Ds does not get any wee leaking out after the ballooning, so hopefully the problem will sort itself out. It all makes me a bit squeamish really, poor boy!

ItllBeLonelymumThisChristmas Tue 28-Dec-04 18:39:05

No time to read whole thread, but we have a ds with a tight foreskin and 2 ds's with hypospadias (deformity of penis). When we saw the surgeon re one of our hypospadias children, we mentioned the ds with the tight foreskin and he said there was no need to worry about this condition until he was about 8. We do try to get him to pull it back to wash himself, but we are not worrying otherwise.

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