Chronic pain... feeling shit, have to see doctor for insurance... handhold needed

(8 Posts)
MountainDweller Mon 16-Nov-20 00:30:51

My life is officially shit! I have chronic pain from lots on things, including back problems, endometriosis, and as the result of two simple accidents which should have healed with no drama, but didn't.

Sprained my ankle 15 years ago, three surgeries, 1st one seemed to fix small cartilage tear but I still had pain. Second surgery did more bad than good, leaving fragments of metal in my Achilles' tendon from a failed screw - ouch! Third surgery with new surgeon sorted this and fixed detached ligaments from a new sprain 9 months after 2nd surgery. But I was left with post traumatic arthritis, and now all that can be done is a fusion or ankle replacement (unless science manages to grow viable cartilage soon). Can't walk far - can manage around the house and little errands but couldn't do a half hour walk with a hill or even half a day sightseeing.

Meanwhile on the other side I have the Hip Injury. Five years ago in the summer I caught the toe of my sandal on a loose edge in an unfinished recycling area and fell forwards with my toe trapped, wrenching the whole of my leg. I felt the tearing at the top where my leg meets my bum. Had to sit down on the floor to recover, absolute agony for a few mins then managed to limp home. Saw physio the next day who was fairly horrified and said to rest and ice it for 6 weeks. It didn't heal. An MRI discovered tearing of the insertional tendon in my leg/bum and on the outside of my hip. Have done the 'medical tourism' as they call it here, where they pass you round different specialists but no one can help. I can't sit down!!! It's just impossible and with my other problems too,even more impossible! I have tried cortisone and PRP injections, neither worked. I am on lots of drugs including opiates and infusions of lidocaine and ketamine at the pain clinic.

And now I have to see what I think is called an advising doctor (I"m not sure what to call it, not in uk) because I cannot work and can't pay my mortgage. It was the banks idea that I claim as DH wasn't working either earlier this year due to Covid. We pay enough in mortgage insurance so they bloody should pay it but it's so stressful! I hate that I have to try to justify myself like this.

I already have mental health problems because of the pain, and I can't concentrate long enough to read a paragraph. I like my work, am sad I can't do it, feel I'm losing that part of my identity. My insurance will only take into account accidents, so my back pain, endometriosis and MH issues don't count. Thinking about it is consuming my whole day! Oh, and DH wants to go to visit family in Aus next year. I can barely make it to the nearest town!

Don't really expect a solution from you guys but sympathy and kind words from anyone who's been through anything similar gratefully received.

OP’s posts: |
xtinak Mon 16-Nov-20 00:44:36

Well that sounds rotten. I'm sorry you are in so much pain and no wonder your mental health is suffering.

I think insurance is there for using. It sounds like an annoying process to go through but from what you describe I don't think you need to worry. You have my sympathies though. Maybe promise yourself a small wee treat after.

MountainDweller Tue 17-Nov-20 00:02:40

Thank you xtinak,** I think writing everything out helped as I fell asleep and only just remembered I posted blush

I have been thinking about it today but in a sensible way, trying to make sure I have all paperwork and writing out a timeline for the doctor. This has been going on since March so I think that isn't helping - I go through a big flurry of doing things, then it all goes quiet and I try to forget about it! My husband is taking me (too far for me to drive) so at least I'll have some support.

Am currently trying to cheer myself up by thinking up a small bloody enormous treat for afterwards. I have a beauty advent calendar waiting for 1 December but in the meantime there will certainly be cake!

OP’s posts: |
UserGeneratedContent Tue 17-Nov-20 09:45:27

Oh that's good that writing things out helped. Glad your husband is taking you. That is a pretty long process since March - this year in particular to me that seems like a lifetime ago! Don't know if you are finding that. An enormous treat involving hopefully a lot of sounds entirely fitting to me!! All the best!

MountainDweller Wed 18-Nov-20 00:09:37

Thanks UserGeneratedContent, yes March does seem a very long time ago! It's been a very long year with not many nice things happening - same for many people I'm sure. I certainly didn't imagine I'd still be in the middle of the process at this point. It doesn't help that everyone involved only wants to communicate by letter, and the post is mightily delayed by Covid!

OP’s posts: |
MountainDweller Sat 21-Nov-20 23:49:07

I am back.. tying myself in knots trying to write 10 years of complex medical history (in my second language) for Dr appointment. Feel that if I get it all down at least I can give it to him if I'm a gibbering wreck or in too much pain to be coherent. I was feeling quite positive for a bit but now I am adding more and more stuff I just don't know how the doctor can get to grips with this amount of info in one appointment (I think he then has time to review it before he writes report). So loosing hope a bit.

OP’s posts: |
xtinak Sun 22-Nov-20 09:24:02

Sorry MountainDweller. It sounds like a hard task. I think it's a good idea to write things down though. It's not too soon for treats!

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MountainDweller Mon 23-Nov-20 15:29:29

Thank you xtinak it's nice that someone is reading my rambling thoughts!

OP’s posts: |

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