Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have medical concerns, please seek medical attention; if you think your problem could be acute, do so immediately. Even qualified doctors can't diagnose over the internet, so do bear that in mind when seeking or giving advice.
This is a Premium feature
To use this feature subscribe to Mumsnet Premium - get first access to new features see fewer ads, and support Mumsnet.Start using Mumsnet Premium
Recovering from pneumonia... I can't rest at all with 2 small children.(19 Posts)
I was discharged from a stay in hospital just over a week ago with pneumonia. I had 6 days of antibiotics.
DH works full time. Gets home about 9pm after being at work 12 hours. He had some time off while I and DD1 were In hospital but we can't really afford for him to have any more time off.
We don't have family help.
My neighbours have been lovely and offered to do things but I don't feel I know them well enough. My close friend has also tried but she's had a hard time health wise too and I don't want to trouble her.
I feel fine now body wise, except I have a persistent cough (which they said can last 3 weeks with pneumonia) and I get a out of breath if I do too much. My chest hurts at the end of the day from all of the coughing.
The problem is I don't stop.
I have a 4 year old and a 10 month old. 4 year old also had pneumonia in January and was in hospital for a week. She hasn't gone back to nursery yet. She will most likely return on Monday after half term as she's back to normal. She's a very active child. A little whirlwind.
My 10 month old is very very heavy. She's also starting to climb/stand and move and i should be exited at her progress but it's just such hard work. I get out of breath just carrying her up stairs. She's super super clingy at the moment.
House is on the back burner. DH and I keep on top of the cleaning but it's a lot messier than usual with toys.
Today I feel horrible. Not poorly but really down. My cough is doing my head in and I'm worried I'll get really poorly again and have to go to hospital.
I want to play with my children and feel healthy but this is just so crap. I look a AWFUL.
Has anyone had pneumonia? How long did it take for the cough to ease up a bit? Did you start to feel more yourself a few weeks after you finished antibiotics?
Sounds awful, I really sympathise. I’ve had it, and, honestly, the cough lasted a while. Any strong smells would trigger a coughing fit for quite some time. I was given an inhaler which i used for a short period of time and that helped. It sounds like a really tough time for you. Just get in bed when the kids go to bed and conserve energy. Keep your water levels up. Day to day, do you have any playgroups you can get to without much hassle? Sometimes just being with other people helps and you’ll get a brew made for you! It’s just survival time while you get right do that’s more telly, or whatever gets the kids through the day without much input. It’s short-lived so don’t feel guilty. Hope you get well soon.
If your neighbours have offered support I would take them up on it. Also maybe your DP could take some dependents leave?
I sympathise hugely with you.
It's normal to have low mood after pneumonia anyway. Its normal to have low mood after long periods of filthy weather in winter. And when raising very young children. You've had all three.
Please consider taking supplements. Liquid iron like Floradix (quite pricey) and Feroglobin (more reasonable) along with Vitamin D spray D-lux or similar may both give you energy that has been depleted during your illness. I agree that short term use of an inhaler could be really helpful.
Are you eating properly? Don't cook if you don't have energy. But do buy healthy ready meals - the grains and lentils in pouches (Jamie Oliver and other brands) are very good. Buy ready roast chickens at the supermarket and fresh soups.
When I was ill and DC were small we'd just make life as easy as possible. Watch loads of children's TV and favourite films on a loop. They'd live on tinned spaghetti and grated cheese. Just until I was well again. If there's a sunny spell in the day, put wellies on and get out - even if just for half an hour to the park.
I agree that all piling into bed is a good idea. Listen to songs on You Tube or a story on audible.
And please do take neighbours up on kind offers. If they could do a shop for you, or hoover stairs you haven't the strength to do, they will feel good about helping out and you might make some friends.
It will pass.
Thank you for your replies!
@milliefiori i should take supplements, could do with a trip to Holland and Barrett!
We're doing a lot of Tv in my bed with lots of toys about. I've subscribed to Disney life as there wasn't much they would glue them selfs to on Netflix or prime and they are enjoying that a lot! DD1 will happily play in her room for hours it's just the baby who I'm struggling with. I feel terrible for it.
I do cook, but only 1 'proper' cooked meal a day at the moment the rest is quite snacky.
I was off food (I've lost a stone in all this) but it's slowly coming back. I do try to eat good but it's hard and I sometimes fall into just snacking on crap while I feed the children.
I must admit I'm AWFUL at drinking enough.
It feels like it will never end. Before the pneumonia we all had flu (we were vaccinated) which developed into the pneumonia and then the hospital stay and now this. I have never felt 'down' but the smallest of thing will just really upset me. I've got no oomph, I wear my pjs most of the time. I'm stupidly irritable too. My period has also stopped. (Not pregnant) the doctor said it can be down to stress and being ill but i don't think that's helping.
DH would take more time off if he could. So will just have to manage and look forward to his days off (tomorrow and the next day thank god!) I'll hopefully get a nice lie in!
Also sympathising here! I thought I had flu but turned out I was wrong and it was pneumonia. Now back home after a few days in hospital and still can’t walk upstairs without a break, so breathless. My older girl is now also spiking temperatures so worried about her and my younger one has just had chemo so desperately hoping she doesn’t get it. I have mostly been sitting on the sofa either watching tv with them or making supportive comments on crafts. Mine are older though - 10 month old must be tougher. I hope you get well soon! X
Do you really not have family help? We both had proper flu with a 10 month old we literally couldn’t look after her. My parents were away travelling dh parents ran their own business which was prioritised above all else. We ended up ringing my aunt and uncle who looked after us for a week. We will never forget their kindness.
Is there a Homestart centre near you? If so, they may be able to send someone to help you for a bit during the day.
MsTSwift why do you suggest ‘really no help’ given if people could they would
If I was ill I would have the same issue- deceased in-laws, and far off land parents. No other family 😞
I really don’t understand why it’s so difficult to comprehend.🤷🏼♀️
Oh bless you, I had it but didn't end up in hospital. Was horrendously weak and spaced for a couple of weeks after the cough had gone. I have hypothyroidism though and at that point undiagnosed asthma so may have been an additional issue.
Have you been given a blue inhaler? It might help you a bit with recovery. Maybe ask for a telephone consultation?
On my worst days I had to just lie in bed with toddler and the iPad and packets of biscuits and drinks. It's all I could cope with. Get well soon
Order loads of microwave meals, Sainsbury's do some that are frozen that are really v good. One is a ham hock and mashed potato.
Drink warm ribena to encourage fluids and have crisps or marmite on toast too to get a bit of salt.
Do you mean that you literally don't have any family? Or is it the case that you have family, but they don't live nearby? If it's the latter could a relative come and stay to help out with the DC?
You poor thing OP. It all sounds really hard
I would strongly suggest you accept some help from your neighbours if they seem to be willing. Even just having someone come over for an hour and entertain the baby, in the house, with you in earshot, would let you rest a bit.
Maybe its a good opportunity to build up a relationship with them. If you feel awkward about being helped then you can just make a mental note to offer help to them in future.
I didn't know anyone when I moved to this village a few years ago but now have a great relationship with my neighbour. We look after each other. She helps me with childcare and in return I look after the IT in her house, invite her over for roast dinners and give her lifts to the train station etc.
We don't currently have family help for various reasons I won't go into. I don't have a very large family anyway.
I have a sister that I see occasionally on a Saturday but she has her own family to look after.
We are also in an area of the country that is extremely flooded right now so don't really want to trouble my sister as it would mean her having to try get to my side of the city around flood waters.
Feeling a bit better after a bit of a break from DH on his day of yesterday and today.
This cough is really doing my head in.
I wasn't offered an inhaler. We have a nebuliser at home though (DH is asthmatic) which the doctor said I was ok to use to help my chest.
I have my friend coming over for tea and a chat tomorrow so that will be nice and break the day up a bit.
Really trying to make my self feel happy and cheery but I can't. I'm feeling increasingly down and really irritable.
I long for warmer days and this bloody flood to go down
Oh my i am so sorry for you it sounds awful... It is pricey but altrient liposomal vit c from amazon may help. You could also get in touch with a herbalist to help with your chest and give you some support. If you don't have much money look up ribwort plantain and go out (to a non flooded bit) pick aome and either juice it or make a tea with it.... Get well soon.
You poor thing. We had flu recently and have two young DD. It's so difficult as it totally floors you. Does your little one have a play pen? A friend of mine has quite a big one for her DS and he has loads of space. She uses is when cooking etc. if you don't could you borrow one? Maybe put on baby tv? I know it's not ideal but it's short term and you can have spells of rest throughout the day and know your little one is playing safely.
Try to have a shower each day and put on some clean clothes.
Go for a short walk, even for 10 minutes, it will build up strength and your feel better for it.
Try to up your fluid intake and try to eat... Cereal / porridge is easy options
Thank you for your replies!
I am feeling better and better every day. It's just the cough and breathlessness after doing 'too much' I'm taking floradix(?) at the moment and that's giving me a boost.
I cleaned the kitchen and the bathrooms today and feel fine though. So that's a good sign.
Had a friend round this morning and just got baby to sleep, DD1 is playing dress up and everything is quiet. So having a nice rest.
I'm still feeling down. Mostly in the evenings and at night time when I've had enough of the day and just want to sleep.
Still no period but the doctor said it's because maybe my body is too focused on getting better and it can sometimes pause periods. I feel like a big ball of hormone though, really irritable and emotional at times.