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Can anyone advise me on this possibly drug related problem?

(22 Posts)
sharklet Thu 30-Aug-07 21:44:27

A conversation I had today with a 4 year old concerned me somewhat.

In essence she told me she doesn't like her daddy because he shouts at her to play down stairs when he and Mummy are taking thier medecine. She then explained and demonstrated how this medecine was taken - and clearly mimed stabbing her leg or ankle with a needle - then she mimed how Mummy then lifts her legs right up high to her chest.

I have other reasons too to suspect there might be something going on. The Mum is a good freind who I had previously though her other half was shady but she wasn't involved herself. She keeps her partner and that whole section of her life very separate from her freinds - none of us met him for the first 2 years we knew her, even since we've met him he stays out of our range as it were.

Now I am really worried. About her, about her little girl and about my little one who she babysits for often.

Any advice? I rang the FRANK helpline but they were worse than useless and I'm not sure who else to call without droppng her in the deep end...

NineUnlikelyTales Thu 30-Aug-07 21:47:17

You've got to ring the NSPCC. I am sure you can do it anonymously. No child should be playing upstairs and keeping out of the way whilst the parents are injecting themselves with drugs. Anything could happen.

sharklet Thu 30-Aug-07 21:49:44

If I have to I will - but what I really need is someone to tell me if this sounds like what I think it is or could it be something plausible. I know I'm maybe clutching at straws but I really don't want to jump to a conclusion about this lady.

Does anyone have any experience thay can share?

tiredemma Thu 30-Aug-07 21:52:20

Yes- I reported a family member who was taking smack in front of her child. SS were worse than useless.

what a miserable existance for a child.

adults should have a duty of care to protect these children from this shit- can you try NSPCC for advice?

sharklet Thu 30-Aug-07 21:54:38

I just checked thier website and it says that if you call to discuss a problem they are law bound to carry out a Child Protection Enquiry. I'm not ready to do that right now - really need some advice from someone who can give some anonymous advice without me naming the family.

sharklet Thu 30-Aug-07 21:55:54

And - do you think that the description sounds like that - I have absolutely no experience of drugs whatso ever so I really am stuck with nothing but a sickening suspicion. What does the description the little girl told me sound like to you?

ScoobyDooooo Thu 30-Aug-07 21:57:14

What sort of thing do you want to know?

tiredemma Thu 30-Aug-07 21:57:21

its confidential though- they wont know its you

tiredemma Thu 30-Aug-07 21:57:53

smack. injected where no-one will see it

NineUnlikelyTales Thu 30-Aug-07 21:59:09

Sharklet I think the description you gave was pretty graphic and I can't think of any other kind of 'medicine taking' that involves secrecy and injecting at the same time as your partner (for example insulin dependent diabetics might have to inject but not necessarily at the same time as someone else).

If there is nothing going on then the parents will have nothing to worry about. I don't think anyone here will be able to reassure you otherwise.

ScoobyDooooo Thu 30-Aug-07 21:59:41

Definatly is a description of this. does not mean it is heroin though this depends on how they act, but the lifting her legs up above her chest is to get it to pump round the body quicker to increase the blood flow & the reason they are doing in there legs/ankles is because these can be covered up & no marks can been seen.

StripeyKnickersSpottySocks Thu 30-Aug-07 22:11:17

This might sound odd but one thing crossed my mind - her parents aren't having sex are they and telling her they're taking medicine as an excuse to tell her to keep out the way. Probably totally wrong, has she actually said she's seen her mum stabbing herself in the leg with something?

sharklet Thu 30-Aug-07 22:24:00

No They weren't having sex. The little girl initiated the conversation, and then mimed the actions she saw her parents perform and described them.

I spoke to the NSPCC just now. They advised me to conforont her (the mother) about it in a gentle way and at least let her know what her LO had said and then guage her response.

pobletsmum Thu 30-Aug-07 22:27:12

It's good that you talked to someone. I just hope that the mother doesn't come down hard on her daughter for telling you about what happens behind closed doors. So, so sad.

ScoobyDooooo Thu 30-Aug-07 22:29:37

Well i think if you speak to the mother about what her dd has been saying she could come down hard on her like someone has said & punish her & also tell her not to go telling people, i think this little girl will live a even more miserable life, this is just so so sad sad

sharklet Thu 30-Aug-07 22:45:07

Her mother is such a gentle kind person I really cannot see her coming down hard on her little one. She may lie to me if I say something about it, but I'm sure she would not hurt her daughter. From where I am standing the damage look sto be from not considering the impact of her actions on her daughter rather than agression towards her daughter. The mother and daughter are completely devoted to each other.

Naive as this may sound thats what I feel about thier relationship. I am scared to death to talk to her about it in case it makes the situation worse, but I think I just have to get my courage up and find a good time to do it.

loopylou6 Thu 30-Aug-07 22:53:47

sharlket what a horrible situation for u sad u did the righjt thing phoning the nspcc, what if this little girl found her mummys "medicine" and took some, i find this truley awful, what a poor little girl sad if i was u i would be wary about talking to the mother i think it would be best if u insisited the nspcc or ss stepped in

loopylou6 Thu 30-Aug-07 22:54:20

oh my goodness, please excuse my typo's, the wine has the better of me blush

NineUnlikelyTales Fri 31-Aug-07 15:18:47

Sharklet you did the right thing, good for you. I hope it goes as well as it can go when you do speak to the mum.

pobletsmum Sun 02-Sep-07 21:44:16

Sharklet - have you thought any more about what you are going to do?

newlifenewname Sun 02-Sep-07 21:49:39

Sharklet, you sound so, so caring about this. One thing: smack can make you aggressive at times and reckless just after you've taken it. I had a boyfriend who was addicted to Heroine and he was very unpleasant at times despite being gorgeous and sweet and caring some of the time.

sparklygothkat Sun 02-Sep-07 21:54:28

I know this is a serious thread, but I just thought that I tell my kids to stay out of the kitchen while I do my injection. Its done into my tummy, but is only blood thinnners, but worried that if my kids mention it to anyone they could get the wrong idea.

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