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What do I say to SIL who has been diagnosed with Motor Neurone?

(8 Posts)
Pushky123 Tue 16-Jul-19 18:45:55

My SIL has recently been diagnosed with Motor Neurone and she and my brother are understandably devastated, and so are we as a family. She's not even fifty and must be so scared. What does one say to someone who has been diagnosed with such a terrible life-shortening illness? I am heart-broken for all the things she won't get to see and do and for the terrible way that her future is going to shape up. How can you possibly say the 'right thing' in such circumstances? We have all offered our help and any money we can, but it's such a brutal illness there is very little anyone can do apart from help to make her comfortable and be there for her.

Pipandmum Tue 16-Jul-19 18:51:17

Just give her a hug. There really isn’t anything you can say. You can’t make it better. Does she have kids? Can you offer to take them every once in a while? Offer to take her to doctors appointments? And the best thing is to not stop seeing her or talking to her when she looses the ability to speak and becomes more incapacitated. Her brain will be all there, just her body will fail. Cruel cruel disease.

Egghead68 Wed 17-Jul-19 12:38:04

That is the worst news. I am so sorry for her and your family. I can only echo advice to be there for her, offer practical help and keep being there for her as she gets sicker.

Pushky123 Wed 17-Jul-19 16:52:54

Thanks for your replies. I guess it’s hard to know there is nothing that can be done. In this world we are used to someone ‘sorting it out’ but there really is nothing apart from, as you say being there for her as she gets sicker, which I feel she will hate as she is such a talented, clever lady. So, so sad 😞

Lawnmowingsucks Wed 17-Jul-19 18:00:05

I'm so so sorry. Sending love thanks

Tingface Wed 17-Jul-19 18:03:47

I think what I would say would be something like,

“DB and SIL, we are just devastated at your news. Please know that we are here whenever you need and for whatever you need. You are not alone. We love you.”

There isn’t anything else really, is there. And then just be there for them as practically as you can I guess.

I’m so sorry x

Greenteandchives Wed 17-Jul-19 18:06:16

I’m so sorry OP. Such a cruel disease.
The MNDA can be very helpful, and they can provide lots of support and information. There is also an online forum, which you could use to chat to others in the same boat.
Although there is no cure, there is a lot that can be done to make sure your SILs life is as comfortable and productive as possible. Make sure your SIL is in contact with her local healthcare team.
Best wishes.

Pushky123 Thu 18-Jul-19 08:56:15

Thank you. Will look at the MNDA site- have so far been getting sad with Doctor Google!

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