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Husband having endoscopy and colonoscopy - please hand hold!

(46 Posts)
graceadlerdesigns Fri 29-Sep-17 15:29:28

I am pregnant and suffering with anxiety. My DH is due to have both procedures next week and I am terrified. I am so worried something is wrong. I keep trying to engage the logical part of my brain and tell myself that I don't know anything is wrong, but I can't seem to control my emotions.

Is there anyone who has had this and had a good outcome? also, how can I support my DH?
BTW, i have rung my midwife and left several messages re support. No answer... no call back. I rang my GP but they cant fit me in until after his procedure!

Please be gentle with me, I am struggling to sleep/ think clearly.

Chewbecca Fri 29-Sep-17 15:34:03

Why is he having them?

Most people have these procedures are suffering with some sort of symptoms now, assume your DH is?

There are many many reasons someone might have these diagnostic procedures, a close relative regularly has colonoscopies as she has ulcerative colitis for example. It is an unpleasant condition but liveable with, assuming you're worrying about life threatening conditions?

Willowkins Fri 29-Sep-17 15:43:27

So sorry you're both going through this grace flowers and here is your handhold.
I have been through this and find the worst bit is the waiting. What I have learned to do is to park my anxiety until such time as I can do something about it. Some of those anxieties are in long term storage but this helps me get through. Can you get some counselling or CBT?

graceadlerdesigns Fri 29-Sep-17 15:45:14

He has had bleeding rectally for a long time (years) , but has repeatedly been told they are fissures. He went back to the docs this summer affter a particularly bad episode, and they did some blood tests and found he was very anaemic. They then referred him for blood transfusions, anda sigmoidoscopy.

The doc who did the sigmoidoscopy said he thought they were healing ok so it must be something else.
I am finding it hard to breathe tbh.... I had a massive panic attack yesterday

Ilikecrocs Fri 29-Sep-17 15:50:53

I’ve had both. I was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease a long time ago.
They will be able to get a really good picture of what’s going on.

Chewbecca Fri 29-Sep-17 15:55:54

Rectal bleeding is one of my relative's symptoms too. There are so many things it could be, you just have to let them have a look inside and check it out.

Agree with the previous comment to try to speak to someone to talk through your anxieties? Have you told your GP it is urgent? They should be able to see you sooner if it is urgent.


graceadlerdesigns Fri 29-Sep-17 15:57:08

Thank you.. Willowkins and Ilikecrocs . I am usually a very sane and rational person, but I adore my husband (childhood sweethearts!) and my pregnancy hormones are making me a complete wreck.

He is very matter of fact, and has said that he doesnt want to worry me, so I am doing my best to appear calm but I am rubbish when i am on my own and don't have to pretend all the time... around my DH and DC I can fake a good smile :-)

I would literally do anything to make sure he will be ok.

graceadlerdesigns Fri 29-Sep-17 16:01:00

I dont want to talk to my DH about my worries as he is adamant that a) everything is fine and b) i am pregnant and not to worry about anything!

I have told my parents and they are telling me I need to be strong, have to focus on the baby etc. I have rung my GP's 3 times, the earliest they will see me is the day I need to take my DH to hospital. My midwife never returns my calls.

Willowkins Fri 29-Sep-17 16:04:31

The Sigmoidoscopy only goes so far so it sounds like they need to look at the whole digestive tract to see where the bleeding is coming from. They will probably do other tests as well. Is there anything in particular you're worried about? (You don't need to say if you don't want to)

graceadlerdesigns Fri 29-Sep-17 16:07:16

I am worried about it being cancer really... I have got several family members and friends (on my side) who have had cancer, and I don't know if i could cope with young DC/ new baby and that diagnosis. I hope that doesnt sound selfish... my DH is a very, very hands on dad, who is probably better with this children than me! I feel like I need him more than ever.

imjessie Fri 29-Sep-17 16:14:15

It's probably chrons or ulcerative colitis . Try not to worry .

Willowkins Fri 29-Sep-17 16:16:00

I was wondering if that was what you were thinking. I really hope it isn't but either way you can only take this one step at a time.

graceadlerdesigns Fri 29-Sep-17 16:29:10

Thank you imjessie and you are absolutely right Willowkins. I know you're right... so why won't my heart stop racing?! honestly, I am annoying myself now!

I pride myself on being an independent, strong person and have coped with so many rubbish things that have happened over the years, but this is so hard.

It would really help if I could have a wine !

charliebear78 Fri 29-Sep-17 17:31:31

The waiting is the worst.
I have had both procedures and developed Health Anxiety during all the waiting and worrying-I convinced myself I had Cancer.
I had almost constant stomach Pains for months/burping and indigestion.
After those procedures(and others) I was given the Dx of IBS.
The bleeding must be so worrying and scary for you!
There is a thread on here(The Lacies) where you would get lots of hand holds
Many posters on there are waiting for Results and while I waited for mine I used the thread and found it very helpful.

MollyHuaCha Fri 29-Sep-17 22:12:23

You can support your DH by helping him stock the kitchen with suitable pre-procedure diet items.

You will also help him by being calm and relaxed. Hope it all goes well. These are routine procedures and I've had them both too many times actually. wink

graceadlerdesigns Sat 30-Sep-17 08:37:35

Charliebear - yes I am sure I will feel better once we know something as my imagination is probably worse than reality. The bleeding wasn't too worrying at first as he has had v bad haemorroids and fissures in the past, and had been told repeatedly it is the cause... now that the sigmoidoscopy has ruled this out I am very nervous. But, every doc seems concerned about the colour of the blood (red), whether has lost weight (about half a stone since his blood tests said he was anaemic but he is drinking less), and if he has loose bowels (he doesnt).

I am presuming that if he had lost loads of weight, did have loose bowels etc this would be more of a concern?

Molly you sound so calm and matter of fact... I need to channel some of that! Thinking of it as routine is something that may help. Also, knowing that lots of other people have had this procedure and it hasn't been the 'c' word really helps.

I don't doubt having some of the other things that have been mentioned is really bad and probably horrible to live with- but if we know what it is and how to treat it I will feel so much better.

I want to be the glue that holds my family together (like my mum) and be strong and relaxed for my dh. I really do. I am just scared. It has made me realise how much my 8th does for me, our dc and our family. He is amazingly thoughtful, funny and helpful. Just the best.

unhingedtoday Sat 30-Sep-17 08:45:30

Has he ever been checked for piles?
My husband is very anaemic and has had to have a transfusion. He has had piles for years, has had both the endoscopy and colonoscopy to make sure there was nothing else going on as the docs were so shocked at how low his blood had got they couldn’t believe it was only from piles!
Try not to worry, the procedures themselves, although unpleasant are pretty safe and quick.
I know it’s hard, but you need to try and calm your worrying down. You haven’t had any results yet.
I suffer from major anxiety issues and have had 2 cancer scares this year. I actually felt very calm during the investigations as I just said to myself that worrying isn’t going to help me and there’s no point until I know what I’m dealing with. Both scares proved to be just that, no cancer found at all.
I have a 4 year old and found that he was a great distraction! Xx

graceadlerdesigns Sat 30-Sep-17 08:58:39

Unhinged he has suffered from v bad piles and fissures for years. The gp he saw 1 month ago gave him new steroid cream and referred him for bloods.

The results were v anaemic and he had a blood transfusion then a rigid sigmoidoscopy that he had on wednesday. The doc who did the sigmoidoscopy said he thought the fissures were healing and didn't think that would have been the cause, hence the referrals.

I wonder if the fissures/piles could be further up and the cause? Orcmaybe the steroid cream has helped them heal? He has said since taking the cream he has been a lot better- occasional blood on the paper (but not all the time) whereas a month or so ago there blood in the bowl.

I hope your cancer scares came to nothing!? I had a hairy time after giving birth and a cancer scare and I was a picture of calm! I guess when it's me I am but more level headed wink

unhingedtoday Sat 30-Sep-17 09:27:43

Glad they seem to be healing, and hopefully the tests will confirm that. They are most likely doing the tests to check for internal bleeding, this is why they did them on my DH. Nothing found except piles.
My cancer scares came to nothing thank goodness.
My DH’s blood is really low again, and he has just come upstairs with DS and disturbed my lie in because he feels exhausted and needs sleep, bloody typical! wink
I suppose I can forgive him as he is probably very close to another transfusion!

MissConductUS Sat 30-Sep-17 16:56:46

Grace, I'm so sorry you are going through this now while pregnant and all the rest.

As others have told you, the testing he's scheduled for is very safe and quite routine. I have ulcerative colitis so I have to get scoped annually. It's not much fun but here in the States it's done under full sedation so you just wake up when it's over.

Colorectal bleeding can have many causes, including irritable bowel diseases like UC and Crohns. You didn't mention his age, but colon cancer is extremely rare under age 50. If they find anything that might possibly be precancerous they'll snip it out during the colonoscopy and send it off to the lab. Results should be back in a week or so.

The Mayo Clinic publishes lots of great, easy to read medical information on their website and they are one of the best facilities in the world for treatment of gastroenerologic disorders and diseases. You may find this helpful:

You will know much more shortly about what you're dealing with. Until then just try to stay centered and calm (not easy, I know).

graceadlerdesigns Sat 30-Sep-17 17:44:52

Thank you misscondunct

My DH is 36 ...

I can't believe how many people out there suffering with various gastric disorders- it must be so difficult. But, I massively appreciate your input and kind words.

I am a long term lurker but this thread has confirmed to me what a wonderful, supportive place MN is.

I have been trying not too Google too much but I came across and article which referred to a link between ulcerative colitis and vitilgo- which my Dh has and this has been spreading slowly in the same period as his bleeding. I will keep it in mind for when we speak to the doc.

Thank you all so much

MissConductUS Sat 30-Sep-17 17:57:43

Vitiligo and UC are both autoimmune system disorders, so I'm not surprised that there is a link. If it does turn out to be UC or Crohn's let us know. I can give you lots of information about the newer treatments, at least one of which (Humira) I know the NHS is dispensing. I'm on another biologic agent called Entyvio that's been a God send.

Please let us know how it goes. I'm sending calming thoughts your way. smile.

graceadlerdesigns Sat 30-Sep-17 21:33:35

Thanks you missconduct I really appreciate the effort.

I will definitely come back as I hate it when I am invested in a thread and the Op disappears ! [Grin]

graceadlerdesigns Tue 03-Oct-17 21:50:18

Just returning to the thread to ask for a little help in talking me down... dh has profuse bleeding again and is due to start the colonoscopy prep tomorrow.

I am so so scared I am physically shaking. I don't know if I can do this. I need my dh. I need him so badly- he is my everything.

imjessie Tue 03-Oct-17 22:16:17

Oh dear grace , the only thing you can do is see what the colonoscopy shows. How long has he had this bleeding?

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