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Can someone please help with my anxiety over bugs

(18 Posts)
Twopeapods Fri 10-Mar-17 22:16:58

I'm really at the end of my tether. I am extremely Emetophobic. In December my DDs school was completely wiped out with norovirus. She was one of the first to get it. I am very strict with hygiene and luckily me, DH or DD2 never got it. I wear gloves. Change my clothes after touching infected bedding, bleach everything in site. I then wash my hands and use hand gel etc. Most other households I know got it.

Now there is another one going about. I have put hand gel into DDs lunch box so she uses it before touching her lunch etc. I am just nervous as hell about it. At the supermarkets I've been disinfecting the trolley before using it, and not touching pin pads and elevator buttons etc. I am constantly washing my hands followed by gel and my hands are bleeding they are so dry and sore. What can I do? I am on edge ALL day EVERYDAY.

ItsJustACompanyPolicyOfMine Fri 10-Mar-17 22:18:03

The only thing you can really do is try to address your anxiety? Are you getting help for it?

Dontactlikeyouknowme Fri 10-Mar-17 22:18:04

Go and see your GP.

BillyDaveysDaughter Fri 10-Mar-17 22:26:41

I am emetophobic too...there is a few of us on here. I know that only your coping strategies are keeping you sane and that you will be very anxious...but do go to your GP and ask for CBT, it is very effective. Some medication will also take the edge off.

For what it's worth I had CBT 25 years ago and have taken medication permanently for the last 18 years...it helps me to lead a relatively normal life, although I've given up on ever being "cured" (after multiple attempts). Accept that you're afraid and then carry on! You're a braver woman than I anyway - I was never able to have children, too scared.

Head down, soldier on...this one will pass too, they always do.

tessiebear4 Fri 10-Mar-17 22:31:21

You have to try to avoid passing this fear to your daughter. Gels are ineffective against Noro anyway. Hand washing is good, but not obsessively.

I don't mean to sound flippant, but you need to try and train your brain not to catastrophise bugs. CBT can help.

Twopeapods Fri 10-Mar-17 22:37:49

No I haven't ever seen the GP about it, I have had it since I was very young. I had a severe choking incident when I was 4 and my mum had me upside down and I vomited which dislodged the thing in my throat. I stopped eating solid food for a couple years and bacame severely underweight and developed this phobia. I wish this had been dealt with in my childhood.
The first thing I do when DD gets home from school is throw her clothes in the wash and wash her hands. I need to get this sorted.

BillyDaveysDaughter Fri 10-Mar-17 22:41:09

Gels with 60% alcohol or more will be effective, as is anything containing benzalkonium chloride as long as it stays moist on your hands for a few minutes. I order stuff online specifically for noro, but Boots do a foam now that covers it.

These are just props to tide you over...the CBT will help you to become a bit more rational about it. They teach you to think all through and get it into perspective.

Twopeapods Fri 10-Mar-17 22:41:13

Tessie are gels seriously not effective??? Omg I did not know that.
Luckily so far my DD has no panic over being sick. She's is very brave and I am so pleased. DD2 has never been sick so time will tell on that.

Twopeapods Fri 10-Mar-17 22:43:14

Billy can you get CBT on the NHS? I don't know if I could afford it otherwise. Maybe if it is just a couple sessions.

BillyDaveysDaughter Fri 10-Mar-17 22:43:56

Yes I woke up vomiting all over myself at the age of 4 too, all alone and in the dark. Sadly my mum had the phobia, so that incident plus her very cold, disgusted reaction set mine off.

It does sound like it's time. Go get an appointment!

shirleycartersaidso Fri 10-Mar-17 22:45:21

I have a family friend just like this. Do you feel strong enough to go the gp? You really need to, they can help.

Friend was washing her hands so much they were cracked bleeding and infected. Some medication and therapy has sorted her out. Good luck 🍀

BillyDaveysDaughter Fri 10-Mar-17 22:46:47

Yes I'm sure you can, but there will probably be a wait. You might be able to get it privately for around £50 per hour? You might want a few close together to start, then start spreading them out. A course is usually 10 sessions, but that was years ago...

tessiebear4 Fri 10-Mar-17 22:49:02

Sorry, didn't mean to freak you out further! Here are some hopefully calming thoughts:
In the grand scheme of things, bugs are rare. Even if you got it twice in say a year, that's still only two days of 365

They are really short-lived! Do even if one does come on, you will know that in a few hours it will be over

They can't harm you. And anxiety can't harm you. It's just an emotion.

tessiebear4 Fri 10-Mar-17 22:50:03

My best childhood friend has this same fear. It's linked to wider stress and anxiety.

BrianBettyGrable Fri 10-Mar-17 22:52:23

I really sympathise, I used to be constantly on edge too with this phobia. I had CBT last year - posted about it here

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/feeling_depressed/2788673-Emetophobia-a-hopeful-story

My treatment was on the NHS, happy to answer questions as I found it positively life changing.

Twopeapods Fri 10-Mar-17 22:56:28

Do sick bugs usually go about this much? It's the waiting for it to happen that really scares me. I've got the sick basins upstairs under the beds along with the puppy pad type things to put under them if the need arises. I had it about 6 years ago very severely while I was visiting family in London. Missed my train home and it took me well over a week to feel better. I often think about how awful it was. DH and DD have had it a few times since but I've managed to avoid it.

Twopeapods Fri 10-Mar-17 23:03:25

Wow Brian I read your post and it does sound like you have made huge progress and the CBT has worked. It's the dread that's hit the nail on the head. I think I make myself feel nauseous when I get anxious about it.
I've not had great faith in my GP for a while but I will make an appointment specifically for this. It does impact hugely on me, and I definitely don't want my girls to get like this.

BrianBettyGrable Fri 10-Mar-17 23:56:39

It has helped so, so much. I really hope you can get access to treatment. Good luck, it is possible to live without that feeling of constant dread.

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