Painful piles - what reason do I give to work not to go in?!

[bubblemcgubble]

So my arse is a ring of fire. I'm in so much pain. Oh joy.

Suffered since having children but hasn't reared up 😀 in the past couple of years. Went on hols a couple of weeks ago and was constipated - now piles have returned and am in agony. Going to docs later as in so much pain.

Between ice packs and going to GP need to ring work as can't go in in this state. What the heck do I say to my manager?? I really don't think I can tell him I have piles...should I roll out a non descript tummy upset??

[WatchingFromTheWings]

I'd go with stomach bug.

[WatchingFromTheWings]

I can sympathise with the piles btw, just recovered from a bout of ring sting.

[Lilaclily]

It's going to look like a hangover the day after bank holiday weekend whatever you say :-(

Hope you get better soon , it sounds horrendous

[user1470771898]

I'd go with Watching - stomach bug is so much more acceptable than PITA. On the constipation front: Vitamin C (1000 mg) and magnesium are your friends - they're worth reading up on.

[TheoriginalLEM]

a personal health issue fir which you are seeing a dr today.

[bubblemcgubble]

God hadn't even thought of the bank hol hangover. If only they knew, I spent yesterday with ice packs between my arse cheeks and nearly in tears because of the pain.

Will have to go to chemist later to get my prescription so will take a loom at vit C and magnesium, thanks user.

Right, going to have to feign a tummy upset. Bloody ridiculous I have to lie. Just really can't tell my male manager what's going on. Think i'd struggle saying the truth if my manager was female to be fair. Somehow bottom issues are just so embarrassing 😦

[user1471521456]

Would you feel able to say something along the lines of "a bowel problem" and that you don't want to go into details for obvious reasons. This avoids lying and looks less like an excuse for a hangover.

[bubblemcgubble]

I always think stomach upset sounds like a blag.

Bowel problem does sound better - good idea. Going to get a GP appointment now. Lovely. Just hoping they don't need to take a peek at my backside. FFS why can't I just have tonsillitis???

[Sugarpiehoneyeye]

Bubble, I would go with The originals advice, you have a personal health issue, maybe, relating to child birth.
A stomach upset, doesn't quite cut it, after the Bank holiday.
Hope you are feeling much better soon, bastard piles.

[GoldPlatedBacon]

May say you have piles. Your manager will be embarrassed and won't ask any more questions