Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have any medical concerns we suggest you consult your GP.

This is going to be cancer isn't it?!

(91 Posts)
Olderkidsaremine Mon 26-Nov-12 13:07:29

My Dad has had a rough time of it over the last few years - servere mental health issues and approx 10 years ago a big operation to remove lymph nodes in his neck due to skin cancer and weeks of radiothearpy afterwards.

Last Tuesday he had a chest xray after complaining about a pain in his chest - long story about doctors dismissing his concerns because his heart sounded fine and he didn't seem to have a problem with breathing, mum insisted on xray! Anyway on Thursday he had a call arranging for a consultants appointment on the 5th December and then over the weekend a letter came through booking him in for a 'scan' on Saturday 1st at 1.30pm.

We are all trying to stay positive - better knowing sooner rather than later etc etc. But this isn't going to end well is it? Any ideas what it could be? Should mention that he has been a smoker for over 50 years.

Olderkidsaremine Wed 09-Jan-13 10:34:57

So today is the day! Dads operation will be sometime this afternoon - he is last on the list. He was admitted yesterday and had another chest xray and ecg - the doctor thought she could hear a heart murmur! So still not plain sailing for him, mum said he seemed so lost and anxious when she had to leave.

So at some point this afternoon we will know if he got though the operation, that is what we are concentrating on now.

50shadesofknackered Wed 09-Jan-13 10:49:50

I've just read this thread, so sorry about your dad's diagnosis. I really hope today goes well.

Olderkidsaremine Wed 09-Jan-13 16:31:06

They took him down, opened him up and saw how much it was in the centre of his chest and then closed him up again sad

Mum is devasted and he will be when they bring him round.

digerd Wed 09-Jan-13 17:13:15

I am so sorry to hear that. I cannot understand in this day and age that it was left so late. My DMs sister had that happen to her in 1965, but they did not have any of the advanced scans , then.
Also don't understand if it is so advanced why they found no secondaries on the CT and Pet scans.
I am so shocked, and upset for all of you.

WipsGlitter Wed 09-Jan-13 18:01:41

I'm really sorry to hear this. I lost my dad to lung cancer about 10 years ago; he was a heavy smoker and once they found it, it was too late. He got great care though. ((Hug))

WipsGlitter Wed 09-Jan-13 18:02:58

We were told that as the main symptom is a heavy cough and as most smokers have a cough anyway the majority of cases are found too late.

digerd Wed 09-Jan-13 18:55:33

My DH did not smoke or have a heavy cough and had regular chest X-rays at work. It was not found because the heart throws a shadow and anything behind it cannot be seen.
That is where it was and was diagnosed by a bronchial endoscopy and was on the left side - with secondaries in the brain. His cancer was estimated as beginning 20 years earlier.

NorthernLurker Wed 09-Jan-13 19:01:28

I'm sorry OP. No getting round it - these are going to be tough days to get through. Just keep talking as a family. Hug one another and pool your strength whilst you look at what comes next.

MrsApplepants Wed 09-Jan-13 20:11:06

So sorry OP, sending love and strength to you and your family xx

timidviper Wed 09-Jan-13 20:15:32

So sorry OP, thinking of you.

Meganlillymai Wed 09-Jan-13 20:47:35

Thinking of u and ur family. Big hugs from cumbria xx

NorthernLurker Wed 09-Jan-13 21:19:21

Small thread hijack - Megan did you get to speak to dd's consultant?

Meganlillymai Wed 09-Jan-13 21:52:28

Yes I did, they couldn't make out her scan as our hospital it shit! So there sendin them to another department in Newcastle but they have got worse sad. Thanks for asking.

Incapinka Wed 09-Jan-13 22:04:44

OP am so sorry to hear what happened today. I had been keeping my fingers crossed for you and your family and will continue to do so. Bastard disease. I can imagine your devastation at the days events and just hope you can all remain as strong as you possibly can and we are all here to hand hold whenever you need us. Since my DMs diagnosis in November we have learnt what an emotional roller coaster cancer is. It devastates you then gives you some hope and then snatches it away again. Really hope you are given some hope again very soon and that you all try to remain positive if you can even though its hard. He is still here so try and make the most of each day... Do you know what they plan to do next? my DM has a very rare form of cancer and a secondary they think but arent sure where. Her only hope on medical grounds is chemo and is already nearing the third cycle and the first scan to see if it is helping. Don't know how we will cope with those results if they aren't showing improvement. As I said earlier bastard disease. Hugs to you and please keep posting if it helps x

50shadesofknackered Wed 09-Jan-13 23:57:30

I'm so sorry for your dad and your family ((hug))

MumOfStan Thu 10-Jan-13 05:17:34

So sorry to read this and like Inca above I too know exactly what this b*****d disease does to a family. I am also so sorry you were given hope and then had it taken away. I can't imagine what that feels like. Let's hope he gets swift follow up with an oncologist and that there is some kind of chemo regime which might offer help. Big hugs to you and your family.

NorthernLurker Thu 10-Jan-13 08:13:23

Thinking of you and your dad OP

Megan - hope you get some more news soon.

yani Thu 10-Jan-13 13:27:21

OP- Sorry to hear your news. Strength to you and your family.

Olderkidsaremine Mon 14-Jan-13 16:28:47

Dad wasn't told the evening of his operation they left it until Thursday Morning to tell him - he seemed to take it well but was drugged up on morphine and had an epidural in and also some other stuff which all in all left him very sleepy and in considerable pain so how much he took in we didn't know! But he needed to be told again on Saturday by mum and myself at different times.

On Saturday evening he was transferred to Critical Care - I thought it was one down from Intensive Care but its the same thing in this hospital! Because his lung had collapsed - his bad lung not his good one - and was on a cpap (sp) machine overnight. That is a phone call I never want to receive again!

We spent all day there yesterday and the surgeon came in and had to tell him again that he couldn't take out his lung - he had asked me on Saturday why he was in so much pain if they hadn't taken it out and I had to explain that they didn't know the extent of the cancer until they had opened him up.

My poor Dad, he's in pain, he's now confused and we haven't been told what the next plan is whether chemo or radiotherapy and when its going to take place.

I hate this, I think I'm coping with stuff and then look in the mirror and think 'oh no you're not' I'm constantly on the verge of tears, not eating properly as have no appetite - even chocolate isn't doing the trick - and was awake early this morning watching the snow fall!!

digerd Mon 14-Jan-13 17:34:13

My DH had the other type of lung cancer, so I don't know anything about his squamous cell type. But am still shocked that they couldn't tell how bad it was with all the CT and PET scans he had. And so sorry that he is now in terrible pain and the op wasn't possible.
Keep us posted. Our thoughts , sympathy and well wishes are with you

longingforsomesleep Mon 14-Jan-13 22:56:22

olderkidsaremine - my heart goes out to you. It's little more than a year since I lost my dad to lung cancer. Did the surgeon not give you any indication of whether or not there was any further treatment they could offer? Once the hospital finally diagnosed my dad (having diagnosed him 2 weeks earlier with "a chest infection") they were very good about making sure we had all the facts and what the outlook was. They also arranged for someone to come and talk us through the options of him going into a hospice or us nursing him at home and the consultant who told us what his outlook was said we could ring his office any time if we had any further questions.

Could you ask the ward doctors to arrange for someone to come and talk you through what happens next? And can't they give your dad more pain relief? It's a truly horrible thing for you all to be going through and you have all my sympathy.

Meganlillymai Sun 17-Feb-13 20:44:40

Anymore news x

Olderkidsaremine Mon 18-Feb-13 00:36:16

Thanks for the interest Megan. It seems so long ago since my last post and its a shock to realise that its only a little over a month ago! Well Dad made a remarkable recovery in the end and was home on the Wednesday after his weekend in Critical Care - very sore, still confused as to why he had to go through the operation if they couldn't take out the lung but was able to eat well and seemed more his normal self.

Since then we have had a trip back to see the oncologist who said that chemo and radiotherapy was the way to go and also told Dad it was unlikely that it would be a cure, which confirmed what the rest of us was thinking but made him happy that he had a chance.

Chemo started on the 7th Feb and apart from hiccups - which is a side effect of the chemo drug - he seemed OK, very sleepy but we all expected that, he then took to falling! Apparently caused by low blood pressure. Also on the 7th he went and got marked out for the radiotherapy. Mum then had a call last Wednesday saying the radiotherapy couldn't go ahead as it was to close to the area where he had it 10 years ago! Mum was and is devastated what little chance she thought he had has diminished little by little as more things can't be done for him. Not sure if the rest of us have really taken it in that if he can't tolerate the side effects of the chemo - which involve sickness nausea and a very sore mouth - then his chances of him living for very long are getting shorter and shorter! Today he has also complained about a pain in his chest - he never complains so it must be pretty bad

I seem to be OK at the moment getting on with work and life in general, keeping kids updated about what is happening etc. I've found that if I occupy my hands then my brain gets a rest from thinking so have knitted a scarf, played computer games and have started to redecorate!!

Meganlillymai Mon 18-Feb-13 21:57:16

Ur doing well and so is ur father. My mum had some news as her breast screening came back irregular and she's to go for more scans. Asoon as she told me this I rememberd what you wer going through and thought of ur father. It's a scary time. Praying for our parents.

Olderkidsaremine Mon 18-Feb-13 23:16:30

He was taken into hospital today with an infection! Not sure where but had a chest x ray to check if it was in the bad lung.

I was OK but not now.

Hopes its good news about your mum Megan and that they are being super efficient.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now