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I feel weirdly calm but still like I need to chat as don't want to tell anyone in RL.

(30 Posts)
JustFabulous Tue 02-Oct-12 12:08:50

Saw GP a while ago and mentioned irregular bleeding. Had something similar to a smear at the surgery then abdominal and vaginal scan. Then referred further and say gynae doctor yesterday. Have to go back and be knocked out for more tests plus a biopsy. Mentioned that I could have endometriel cancer. Just waiting for appointment now.

Last Friday saw GP and he has referred me to the breast clinic as I have some symptoms that could mean cancer but no lump.

I really don't think I have breast cancer, just think it is something else. No idea about the other one but sure all fine.

I feel fine emotionally. Just waiting to see really but wonder if I am being weird as I am not doing my usual panic and stressing.

Don't want to tell anyone as I don't want them worrying. DH knows though.

Hopeforever Tue 02-Oct-12 12:13:35

Virtual hand holding.

It's wonderful you are so calm. I know you don't want to worry people, but might they be a bit hurt they don't know? Thinking best friend, sibling or your parent(s)

JustFabulous Tue 02-Oct-12 12:22:44

I have 3 close friends. One is just going through a break up, one has had cancer and one is busy with kids, a job and is a single parent so don't want to burden any of them. I don't have siblings or parents. I told DH on the phone and his blood went cold and I don't want to make someone else feel like that. I am seeing a friend this week I have known for a couple of years and I could tell her but she hadn't realised even the first problem could mean something serious so not sure.

Hopeforever Tue 02-Oct-12 15:16:37

You really are thinking about others before yourself! I still think they would rather know, sometimes the busiest people are the best to tell as they can keep as sense of perspective and balance

You can phone to ask about appointments, sometimes they fit you into last minute cancellations. Or would you rather not rush the consultant visits?

Elibean Tue 02-Oct-12 15:39:26

I don't think you are being weird - I think, on the whole, reality is far easier to deal with than imagined catastrophe and not nearly as awful smile

Just wanted to wish you luck with the test results. I saw your other thread, and can guess why the GP referred you but that sort of cancer is very rare - so am optimistic on your behalf, and glad you are too!

JustFabulous Tue 02-Oct-12 19:28:56

Hope - I really can't text one friend as she sometimes doesn't reply for days and tbh if I told her and got no response I would feel pretty crap.

I know I would be minimising things if I told anyone as part of me is worried, of course I am, but I am thinking I would know if things were really bad and I don't so they aren't.

Elibean, my blood has gone cold. Tell me please.

Elibean Tue 02-Oct-12 19:32:39

Oh gosh, no, didn't mean to scare you! sad Quite the opposite! Just that there are very very rare breast cancers that don't grow in lumps - so that would be why he referred you, to cover all bases and make sure you didn't have one of those.


Elibean Tue 02-Oct-12 19:33:54

Plus, fwiw, the breast symptoms you had I've had several times too - and been thoroughly checked out. Nothing sinister at all.

JustFabulous Tue 02-Oct-12 19:36:56

Okay <huge sigh>.

My grandmother had breast cancer, breast off, had a few years, cancer back every where, dead within 3 months.

I have been through a lot of shit in my life and I am not going to have anything bad. I am just not.

Elibean Tue 02-Oct-12 19:37:39

Good smile

I think you should trust your instinct on this one!

JustFabulous Wed 03-Oct-12 19:46:29

Now I am not calm.

Hospital just rang. Having "surgery" in 12 days time.


ParsingFancy Wed 03-Oct-12 19:48:17

Oh Fab. <holds hand>

JustFabulous Wed 03-Oct-12 20:07:11

My heart is going so fast.

ParsingFancy Wed 03-Oct-12 20:09:44

Is this for a biopsy?

l4k Wed 03-Oct-12 20:10:01

Is this for surgery on the breast? Is it an biopsy of some sort ? How very worrying for you. I can point you in the direction of some lovely ladies with good advice about any cancer worries but mainly breast cancer. They are in the tamoxifen thread and I know they'll have the knowledge to help.
Hope everything is sorted out for you quickly with the best possible outcome. Take care.

JustFabulous Wed 03-Oct-12 21:00:54

It is for a hysteroctomy (not sure if that is right) and a biopsy. Still waiting for breast clinic appointment. I am less worried about that as the pain has eased loads since I got new bras and the other symptoms have gone. I just feel sick as it feels real now.

ParsingFancy Wed 03-Oct-12 21:10:22

Very good luck for the op.

JustFabulous Wed 03-Oct-12 21:16:01

Thank you.

Gigondas Wed 03-Oct-12 21:19:57

Just fabulous if you want an anonymous place to vent and worry about cancer- head over to tamoxifen thread in general
Health. Lots of us undergoing treatment and after but are happy to hand hold and listen when waiting on tests too.

With bc most lumps aren't cancer and even if they are the treatment is very successful these days.

JustFabulous Wed 03-Oct-12 21:24:36

Thank you. I would feel a fraud though as I don't think I have bc. Not sure if I have ec though, feel numb really.

Gigondas Wed 03-Oct-12 21:26:34

That's normal- this is hardest bit waiting on op with added tension of finding out you might have the dreaded cancer. I couldn't take it in either so was numb or convinced op would kill me.

Gigondas Wed 03-Oct-12 21:27:51

You aren't a fraud- have hand held plenty of people on thread who had a scare and those that did have cancer. And you know what most of us who have been diagnosed (even with bad prognosis) are dojng ok so I just want to offer you that thought.

DameEnidsOrange Wed 03-Oct-12 21:28:57

JustFab I have no wise words to offer, just a hand to hold in gentle support

alto1 Wed 03-Oct-12 21:54:40

That'll be hysteroscopy - where they have a look at the lining of the womb and take a biopsy. I had one - it was very straightforward and they found a benign cause for my irregular bleeding, which they treated straight away.

Hope it turns out well for you and you get the answers you need

JustFabulous Thu 04-Oct-12 07:26:15

I have told a friend this morning by text. Feel crap that she will worry now. Feel sick to my stomach whenever I think about the surgery.

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