3 years ago my dad was fit and healthy, only in his early 60s. One weekend he was ten very ill, very suddenly which resulted in an emergency hospital admission and he nearly died. He was in hospital for six months and it was 4 months before they said they thought they knew what was wrong with him.
He's been diagnosed with systemic vasculitis which is very hard to treat successfully. He is on as much treatment as is known about, but I get the impression the condition isn't very well understood. Local hospital have been very good and admitted he is beyond their help and referred him to the national specialism hospital for it. I've no complaints about his treatment, there just isn't a cure.
He has had several relapses over the last 2.5 years that have resulted in hospital admissions. His general trend is downwards.
He's lost most of his hearing. His blood pressure runs at about 200/120 and they can't get it down even with loads of medication. He has terrible constant crushing pain in his head which painkillers don't help with. He has tinnitus which drives him nuts. His legs hurt like a bad muscle ache all the time. His balance isn't very good, he has hardly any energy.
He finds walking difficult, he says its like he hits an invisable forcefield and that he's having to push through soup to walk anywhere. He has a walker and also a electric scooter thing.
He lives on his own though he does have a girlfriend close by and he goes to stay with her when he's feeling worse than normal. After his first hospital admission he could still walk to the local shops and back in about 15 minutes with his walker. Now he says it takes about 90 mins as he has to lean up a wall and rest every few paces. He has to rest 2 or 3 times when going up the stairs.
I'm scared he's going to have a stroke or a heart attack with his BP being so high.
I just spoke to him today and he sounded so depressed. He said his whole life is quite shit. That he doesn't have the energy to do anything even more. He says that the last couple of weeks his appetite has gone and he can't eat. He can't even force himself to eat as he finds it an actual struggle. He says he struggles to even have a cup pf coffee now.
He's only 64 now. He has the lifestyle of a 90 year old so I can understand why he feels so down. I think at first he tried to keep himself busy doing sedentary things such as watching TV, family tree stuff but he's finding that too much now. Its just so fucking unfair.
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General health
I am really worried about my dad's physical and mental health. Scared he may die soon.
VivaLeBeaver · 15/10/2011 18:54
No advice really, just lots of sympathy. I watched my mum go through a similar decline and it is really hard, especially when they were very active and social before. Try to make sure he's still getting visited by friends if he can't get out. He must be feeling down already without getting isolated.
Have a ((hug)). Not much use but it's all I've got. Try to get someone IRL to give you a shoulder too. It's harder to stay upbeat in their company if you have no other outlet for your grief. And it is grief of a sort because they're not the person they were. He will be grieving too, for his old life 
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