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DLA to fill in the whole form describing your worst day?

(16 Posts)
ItsTooBadYouHaveToLie Mon 19-Sep-11 15:11:22

HAVE NAME CHANGED blush

DP has spondulitus (sorry not sure how to spell it) work has finished him as he was a window fitter so due to health and safety he could no longer work there.

he has applied for other jobs but no replies so we've been struggling with money, even job centre is gonna change from JSA to a different benefit (cant remember what)

was advised to fill in a form to claim for DLA but i have never seen such a hard form! even the job centre said fill the entire form in as if it is your worst day ever! and say you can only walk a few steps etc..

AIBU to think that its too bad you have to exagerate the truth for a bit of extra help? i have had to give up full time work to go part-time as DP can't manage DD all day (picking her up etc) and walking up the school to get DS (he's in full time school)

has anyone had to fill in the DLA application? my next door neighbor has cancer and been given 2years to live and they refused her first claim shock

NettoSuperstar Mon 19-Sep-11 15:31:04

I did it quite recently with the help of the welfare support officer at my local council.
I'd also just had an esa medical so they used information from there too.
It was granted in less than two weeks.

troisgarcons Mon 19-Sep-11 15:34:56

It's nigh on impossible for an adult to get a first claim through - unless you have "specialist" help ie someone who knows the ins-and-outs of the system like the back of their hand.

Yanbu, that's what you're supposed to do

Groovee Mon 19-Sep-11 15:47:12

It's horrible to read back the day when you need support to get out of bed or needing to wait on a relative coming in to cook a meal for your children because you are unable to. But then if you don't do your worse day you'll get refused anyway.

I filled mine in last year and honestly didn't expect to get it, that I didn't open the letter when it arrived as I thought I'd cry. I was shocked to find money in my account and then opened the letter and I'd been awarded a pittance but it helps pay for childcare on my bad days.

itisnearlysummer Mon 19-Sep-11 16:58:23

You have to fill it in as thought it's your worst day ever because those are the days you need the extra support.

As long as you aren't lying about what you detail as your worst day ever, then it's what you have to do.

Do you have someone who can help you fill it in?

itisnearlysummer Mon 19-Sep-11 16:59:36

Spondilitis is nasty. My mum's uncle has it and, like with most disabilities, he has good days and bad ones. But even his good days aren't like the good days he would have if he didn't have it.

It's all relative.

oldraver Mon 19-Sep-11 17:23:33

Someone at the C.A.B helped my Mum with my Dads form I think it did help having someone who knew how to word things, and they were awarded at first attempt even though they had been warned it was difficult.

madhairday Mon 19-Sep-11 17:34:14

Even my gp and consultant advised me to fill it in as if on my worst days.

It was a bloody depressing form to fill in. I cried for days after. It makes you realise how bad things are and how different from the 'norm' you are.

CAB advise it too. YANBU to think it's sad we can't be completely specific about how things are all the time but YABU to not fill it in as if on his worst days. Good luck.

(Hijack to say Netto, I've started a thread in chat asking about ESA, would be interested in your viewpoint if you have a min, cheers)

Grumpla Mon 19-Sep-11 17:42:48

YANBU.

The bad days are when you need the extra help. So you might be able to drive or walk on good days, but on a bad day you'd need two or three taxi rides (drop kids at school, pick kids up, get to docs etc) and some of the things that might cost you extra money (maybe a mobility aid or a handrail or a ramp) are something that would need to be in your house every day even of you only had to actually use them two or three times a week.

DLA is there to help you with those costs, there is nothing wrong with thinking about the bad days when you fill out that form. It's not scrounging! It's just being practical.

whatdoiknowanyway Mon 19-Sep-11 17:49:44

Filled in similar with attendance allowance for my dad who had dementia. Felt wrong as often we coped but on the days we didn't he could have been badly hurt so it was important to describe things at their very worst.
If you can get specialist help in completing the form go for it.

Meanwhile read though your original post again and imagine it was someone else. You've had to reduce your hours to help support your family. What other impacts has his health had on your DC? Living it yourself you tend to normalise it but what would you think if it was your sister or good friend? You'd tell them to stress the worst case I'm sure.

My DH has a debilitating condition that was laughed at by our doctor until I went in and read a list of everything we couldn't do as a family because of his condition. Fortunately for us he has a desk job so can still work but I fully empathise with the restrictions which a partners health can have on the whole family. Don't be afraid to tell it how it is.

OliviaMumsnet (MNHQ) Mon 19-Sep-11 18:26:17

Hi there
We're going to move this to adult health
Thanks
MN Towers

5inthebed Mon 19-Sep-11 18:26:50

The DLA form are horrible to fill out, very depressing to do them. even more so when you are doing it for a child. But yes, you need to do them for the worst day ever, as this will show what help you need.

If you are finding it hard, there are charities and CAB who can help you do it.

Good luck.

SanctiMoanyArse Mon 19-Sep-11 19:04:08

Can I offer some advice OP?

When you fill in the bad bits, hold a piece of apper separate and then list a nice thing for everyone. DO NOT send in to DLA of course, but pin it on the fridge to read when you are down.

So DH was lucky his condition could be treated with lifelong meds so did not need to claim DLA but as an example bad thing: cannot sleep for more than twqo hours at a time and needs to nap regularly in day

(Good thing- always does his share of the housework without being asked yet never nags if I don't)

I follow that with my asd boys mas well.

And do it in segments with a glass of win, and if possible a CAB advisor on hand.

And do NOT take a refusal personally- it's pretty much automatic, it's just another screening level, just follow the procedures they list for reconsideration.

TheHumanCatapult Mon 19-Sep-11 19:21:41

it is horriable to fill in and the lady that phoned up to ask more uestions was dam annoying having to explain no it wont fix and no i cant walk means i really cant walk no not even a little

But i cried filling it in was hard putting it all down in black and white.Am fortunate that i had plenty of medical back up so was awarded it eventually

PieceOfTheMoon Mon 19-Sep-11 20:02:24

OP - this is a really horrible form to fill in and I think there is a knack to knowing how to word things.

I have found the CAB extremely helpful with all benefit claims, so it would be worth getting an appointment to get some advice.

One thing I have found useful is to write a list of all the things you want to include and make sure you get them all in somewhere. Don't worry if you feel like you are repeating yourself - in fact check through afterwards to make sure your answers are consistent as there are some very similar questions.

Agree with all the other posters who say that you should complete it based on your worst day. Also agree that you will probably have your first claim declined.

Take a photocopy of your completed form - this will make it easier to fill in next time. Even once you get your claim approved you will probably have to reapply periodically if it is a long term illness (sorry, I don't know what spondulitus is).

Finally - good luck!

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