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Exeter fucking 'hospital' fucking up again

(13 Posts)
Jux Fri 01-Jul-11 10:12:24

Sorry for the swearing in the title.

DH in hosp; due to have procedure this morning. In his morphine induced haze yesterday he thought he heard Dr saying nil by mouth from midnight. This morning, breakfast brought round and he is offered it. He says he thinks he's meant to be nil by mouth, does this apply to water too? Breakfast person says she'll check. Comes back, it's not in the notes, what's in the notes is Normal Diet. He has breakfast.

So they can't do the fucking procedure until this afternoon. He'll have to stay in yet another fucking night. DD and I will visit him using train and then bus which will take over an hour. Then we'll come home, which will be over an hour and probably longer at that time of night.

In the two days he's been there, he's been writhing in agony on the bed groaning with pain and it has taken an hour and a half to get him painkillers. Every time. (No, it's not that they're not due yet, it's that it takes an hour and a half from when he reminds them they're due to fucking get them).

This is the same fucking hospital where my mum, about 10 days before she died, was NOT FED for TWO WHOLE FUCKING DAYS because no one took the fucking Nil by Mouth sign down, and when it finally went the physios took her away to "teach her how to go upstairs using a stick" while breakfast was being served and NO ONE THOUGHT "OH SHE HASN'T HAD ANYTHING TO EAT BECAUSE SHE WAS OFF THE FUCKING WARD WHILE FOOD WAS GOING ROUND" and then everyone was terribly fucking surprised when she fainted and they kept her in for another fucking day while they 'found out why she'd fainted'. YOU FUCKING STARVED HER AND THEN GAVE HER FUCKING EXERCISE AND SHE WAS 84 AND HADN'T BEEN ABLE TO EAT PROPERLY FOR WEEKS; THAT'S WHY SHE WAS IN THERE IN THE FUCKING FIRST PLACE YOU FUCKING FUCK WITS.

Thank you.

whomovedmychocolate Fri 01-Jul-11 19:11:56

sad Sounds shit to me Jux

Good luck to you all for tomorrow.

Chipotle Fri 01-Jul-11 19:17:52

Not Exeter but my Mum was nil by mouth for 6 weeks she was fed white stuff in a tube through her upper arm. Above her bed was a big sign saying NIL BY MOUTH... However every single day she was offered breakfast and a cup of tea from a well meaning member of the catering team.

Chipotle Fri 01-Jul-11 19:18:07

Good luck for tomorrow!

gingeroots Fri 01-Jul-11 20:35:34

oh how dreadful - feel for you !
Is it worth keeping a record and complaining later when you have time ?
Sending all my sympathies - be ruthless ,complain ,make a fuss now if you can.

Jux Fri 01-Jul-11 21:52:21

He won't be home tomorrow. He was supposed to be in theatre about 3 but went down at 8 this evening.

This is my fault. If I hadn't been so irrepressibly optimistic from the day he went in, the whole thing would have gone delightfully smoothly and he'd be fine now. From the moment I discovered he'd driven himself there in the small hours of the morning, I've been saying "they'll give iv anti-biotics and he'll be home tomorrow morning wanting toast".

I reckon if I don't expect him home for several months, he'll have a better chance.grin

Anyway, he's been wanting to lose weight for ages, he can't smoke or drink so somehow he'll come out healthier.

drsharryn Fri 01-Jul-11 23:53:51

People think if they complain they'll get worse treatment. You don't.
Ask to speak to matron or consultant or bed manager. Be calm though - vent now as aggression and swearing does put folk's backs up.
Ask to make verbal complaint - its treated just like a written complaint.
Oh and talk to PALS (patient advice & liaison service)

www.drsharryn.wordpress.com

gingeroots Sat 02-Jul-11 08:04:27

drsharryn - good advice .
You really will find that it's worth complaining ,usually the good staff are sick to death with the ones that let them down and are quite happy to act on complaints .
My only problem has been that it's hard to be calm and together enough to take on complaining while coping with a sick rel;ative .
In which case do it retrospectively .

ScaredyDog Sat 02-Jul-11 11:47:39

That's awful about your mum, really shocking.

It's crap that they hadn't updated your husband's notes too. But to be honest, I would expect an adult who is having a general anaesthetic to know that they can't eat before it - particularly if the procedure was in the morning and he was offered breakfast by mistake. Sorry.

Hope he's ok now and home with you.

Jux Sat 02-Jul-11 22:35:24

I know ScaredyDog, but the consultant/surgeon (?) who made the decision, didn't actually tell him, but was muttering to whoever it was accompanying him. DH was actually a bit out of it on morphine, paracetomol and codeine, and exhausted from lack of sleep and pain. No one actually said to him that he would definitely going to theatre the following day. He sort of "gathered" it from what he overheard in his drug-induced haze.

When he questioned it in the morning, which he did, quite strongly, everyone said absolutely definitely that he should eat normally. He actually went to the nursing station at the entrance to the ward and checked with the senior nurse there. At this point, if you are bloody hungry, and you are told that you can eat, you kind of assume that you were dreaming the night before, or that things have changed overnight and as no one was telling him what was going on anyway, he just thought that as usual, he was The Unit and Didn't Need to Know. He's not thinking that clearly even now. He's still in pain and then gets spaced out on the medication, so you can't really expect him to be normal right now, and he was much worse yesterday morning. Another night with no sleep due to pain etc. It all adds up, and your mind doesn't function properly.

When we saw him today, he was much better and his face is being drained. He has talked about complaining, but drsharryn, he is worried that he will suffer for complaining so will wait until he's discharged. He is going to write several letters to specific people and also to Management etc naming names.

I wanted to talk to someone today, but he really didn't want me to. As I approached the nursing station one nurse slammed down the phone and started ranting. Everyone else there was totally absorbed by her. I didn't think it was a good time to have a proper conversation with them. My presence even noticed.

Anyway, gingerroots is right; I would cry. I don't think I'd get angry, but I know I would just dissolve. I know I would cry so hard I wouldn't be able to speak. I can barely hold things together. I know it's pathetic. I'm crying now.

He's a difficult man I know, but there are two people in particular whose attitude is truly dreadful. Like the patient is irrelevant and is not actually a person.

He was initially examined (after triage) in a public room with people just sitting around watching him scream and writhe around, cry and beg for pain killers. There was an empty cubicle right next to them. Eventually he asked if the doctor could do the examination in private and she TUTTED! They did go into the cubicle though. When she'd finished and told him to wait there, he asked if he could lie on the bed and she said no because they'd have to put a sheet on it. He'd been there for over 6 hours with no pain medication and was desperate. He lay down anyway.

A couple of years ago the hospital had its' knuckles rapped not long after my mum died, for the same reasons. They don't seem to have pulled their socks up much.

On the other hand, there are a couple of nurses on his ward who are wonderful. He is going to write about them too and send flowers. (Are flowers good, or would chocs or biscuits be better? Home made cake?)

Thursday was strike day, so not the greatest day to go in, but he couldn't help that. It doesn't seem to have made much difference, as the - almost callousness - has continued all week.

Beaaware Sat 02-Jul-11 23:19:16

Well done for exposing the appalling practices in our hospitals, I am busy trying to expose the risks of human BSE in the health system, another area of our 'wonderful' health system that is kept under wraps from the unsuspecting public Good luck to your hubby.

duchesse Sat 02-Jul-11 23:31:06

I have been in the RD&E twice in the last 2 years and must have been really really lucky. I did note a few dicey things while on the orthopaedic ward, not ones that happened to me but just while I was there, and it seemed to me that there was only 1 (super-extremely) competent nurse on duty in the 24 hours I was there- the others seemed all just a bit thick and lacking in empathy.

Hope your DH is sorted asap. I think the only solution is for the patient and relatives to keep a VERY close eye on what's going on tbh, and to ask questions/ challenge things whenever there seems to be a problem. Staff are so rushed off their feet that many can't think straight.

Jux Sun 03-Jul-11 21:17:38

I've asked MN Towers if they'll edit the thread title but they'd rather let it stand. Not important, though.

DH is home, thank goodness. He has a massive hole in his neck, needs the dressing changed everyday at the surgery, but that's local. Has slept for 6 hours -his longest stretch since Tuesday night has been 2. Can't have solids, is on two anti-biotics, one 3 times a day and the other 4. He keeps crying, poor sod. Exhaustion, pain, trauma.

Thank god he's home where he'll be looked after.

They gave him pain killers to bring home. Paracetomol 500. Arf grin so he's taking his trusty Solpadeine Max.

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