Making friends in a new area(7 Posts)
We are considering moving to the other side of the country. DD is 1 and I have made lovely mum friends from NCT/clinics etc in my local area. In fact losing these new friends is the main reason I have misgivings about moving. I will be a SAHM when we move. How easy is it to make friends with other mums even if your child is older ie you dont have the NCT/new baby support thing as a way of hooking up?
Are you thinking of moving to a city or a small town/village?
I moved from Scotland to England when my dd was 2.5. I can't pretend it was easy, but a couple of people spoke to me at playgroup but it was hard, as a live in a village and most had already established friendships from baby groups/mother & toddlers etc. I still have one friend from then (dd is now 9) and tbh she was the friendliest person of the bunch. I think that is the key to tried to seek out the person who looks the chattiest.
I certainly found it easier when I had ds (now 3.7) and have more mum friends with children his age then I do with dd's age group.
It is hard - where are you moving too? Perhaps you should try to hook up with mn'rs in the area.
I think it very much depends on the area you go to and how outgoing you feel. I know some mums who feel very isolated, but due to their own personal issues with socialising.
If you are prepared to go out and find people, I really think it is not too difficult, if you go to parent and todder groups, although they can be a bit cliquey to start with, perserverence can be positive. I did not do too much new baby stuff as my mum was very ill so i spent a lot of time travelling, which meant I started a bit later with the socialising.
I go to baby group once per week (or DP does), take DD to water babies once a week, and she goes to nursery once a week where I meet other parents, and she gets invited to parties so I get to meet parents then too. And of course, there is MN so if its to an area where there are other mn'ers, then your sorted!
I'm wondering about this too, as I'm due to move north in a few months and will have to leave all my friends/NCT group here in the south.
One thing that has been really useful for me getting to know others in this area is the local NCT coffee morning drop in session. I figured that if there wasn't one of these where I move to, I would set one up, and probably advertise in the local doctors surgery for someone to co-run this with me. Would this be any good to you?
Thanks for the posts.
Yes thats a good idea to be proactive in setting up own group.
Initially were thinking of a village, but have taken fright that that may be abit isolated so thinking of the edges of a city (Bath). Lots of good reasons for moving (nearer my lovely parents/sister, less stressful long hours for DH, nearer the countryside, more house for your money) but worried about being new kid on block having carefully set up mum friendships here.
If and when we move again, I am going to volunteer/get involved at the school dds will be going to next, even if they aren't quite there yet. This is a great way to meet people and get your finger on the pulse locally, so to speak. Before you know it your toddler will be in nursery.
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