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Please help me camouflage this monstrous shed

(24 Posts)
smashedinductionhob Sun 26-Mar-17 11:15:35

we tried for some years to just "blot out" this builder's shed when it appeared on the border with our small garden. That hasn't worked, not least because builder neighbour hates ivy and climbers generally. So I have pulled down previous attempts.

I am posting photos straight on and also from what used to be my secluded non-overlooked spot nearby.

I think a small tree is best. Something that branches out neatly at the height of the top of the wall. What do you think? It needs to be neat because he likes neat stuff and doesn't hack at it.

The shed really is this orange, by the way sad

Please could you recommend a small tree?

smashedinductionhob Sun 26-Mar-17 11:18:26

I wondered in all seriousness if I should get something with orange flowers. I thought pink cherry blossom would clash.

Please help.

smashedinductionhob Sun 26-Mar-17 11:19:12

Not a tree, but a neighbour has Japanese quince which looks good and stands erect.

MirabelleTree Sun 26-Mar-17 11:24:51

That's a pain sad They are expensive but if budget allows what about one of those pleached trees on a frame so you still get the space in the garden but screening at the height you need it ? If you go down the flowers route maybesomethimg with a white blossom.

smashedinductionhob Sun 26-Mar-17 11:26:33

Thank you for replying.

I had not heard the term preached. Off to google.

MirabelleTree Sun 26-Mar-17 11:28:50

It's pleached I think. The stem is clear, will see if I can find a picture

smashedinductionhob Sun 26-Mar-17 11:30:49

Sorry, pleached.

Auto correct!

MirabelleTree Sun 26-Mar-17 11:31:21

I'm having problems linking but 'pleached hornbeam tree' should do it. I think they do some evergreens that way too.

MirabelleTree Sun 26-Mar-17 11:31:51

Thought it might have autocorrected grin

smashedinductionhob Sun 26-Mar-17 11:32:34

He has also pulled the coping stones off centre over to his side so I need the branching to be at the coping stone level.

I should go measure heights shouldn't I? Heights of wall and disgusting trump-like shed.

MirabelleTree Sun 26-Mar-17 11:33:37

He sounds a bit of a nightmare sad

smashedinductionhob Sun 26-Mar-17 11:33:58

Thanks for replying. There was a beautiful tree there before the monster shed..... but it can be nice again....

smashedinductionhob Sun 26-Mar-17 11:35:19

He is. I've on mumsnet 10 years and I've never posted on it. I just find it too upsetting.

Thanks for the support. We shall overcome!

MirabelleTree Sun 26-Mar-17 11:39:47

I have one of those too. Came out one day and he had cut down over 20 foot of my hedge to nothing. I did post and complain loudly on one of the gardening threads. I have had my revenge though as after he did that I discovered that some of the very tall conifers turn out to be mine after all so mentioned to him I'm thinking of removing them. He went a bit pale and every now and then I parade tall pruners along where he can see them then await the anxious scurrying noise it brings in from his side of the fence. Childish but it amuses me as he was an utter arse.

OreoDream Sun 26-Mar-17 11:44:14

Op, how tall roughly is the shed? If it's taller than an a normal shed he may need Planning for it. Did he get planning permission?

smashedinductionhob Sun 26-Mar-17 12:29:01

<solidarity with Miabelle>

smashedinductionhob Sun 26-Mar-17 12:30:50

Oreo thanks but that ship has sailed IYSWIM

So, I need the tree/standard to split off at 1.5m and be 3m high.....


PollyBanana Sun 26-Mar-17 12:35:16

You imply that he didn't get planning permission.
Should he have? Or was it granted retrospectively?

Clankboing Sun 26-Mar-17 12:41:25

If you go to a decent nursery / garden centre there are loads. I would google "tree" then position first eg sunny west facing (workout which compass side it faces). Do you want it to be evergreen? Have fruit / berries/ blossom? A eucalyptus is silvery grey grows quickly, may cover quickly. Pay a bit more and get a focal point eg a tall columnular blossom tree. You could even forget a tree, have a corner pergola and grow evergreen honeysuckle over it. Think about where the sun is - if you put a shady tree in the only piece of sun you'll be fed up with it therefore try trellis and climber.

Clankboing Sun 26-Mar-17 12:44:08

Sorry reread - not a climber. A rowan tree may be nice, or Amelanchier? Columnar blossom tree? Magnolia? All pretty focal points. You could even have a small weeping willow. Or a large evergreen flowering shrub.

smashedinductionhob Sun 26-Mar-17 18:32:38

Thank you!

We have been to the garden centre and come back with a prunus and a malus -will have fun deciding which one(s) goes there!

Wish us luck.

shovetheholly Sun 26-Mar-17 19:39:17

Lovely choices! I think once you have something you love in front, that shed will recede into the background and you'll no longer have it inflicted upon you!

Palomb Sun 26-Mar-17 20:42:09

A line of pleached trees would be lovely there I think.

smashedinductionhob Sun 26-Mar-17 21:06:18

Thanks so much for understanding, it means a lot.

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