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pot plant or tree to to remember lost baby *miscarriage mentioned*

(13 Posts)
inamaymaybewrong Sun 14-Jun-15 12:45:23

I hope it's ok to post here? I miscarried very recently and rather than bury the remains in our garden (as we may move in a year or so), I would like to plant them in a small container within the pot of a tree or plant that could move with us. Can someone recommend something outdoor, hardy (I'm no gardener!) and attractive please? My baby was conceived in April, was lost in June and was due in January.

agoodbook Sun 14-Jun-15 14:39:45

so sorry for you, its a lovely idea.
How about one of these?
Pieris Japonica 'Katsura'
Camellia 'Jurys Yellow'

shovetheholly Sun 14-Jun-15 15:01:23

I am so sorry for your loss flowers. It is a lovely idea.

Three different approaches, depending on your style:

1. Clipped (topiary) yew, perhaps in a standard 'lollipop' shape. The traditional plant to represent the idea of life and eternity. It keeps a shape very well.

2. This is a very tried-and-trusted recommendation, but amelanchier is always recommended on here are the four-season tree. However, it is fast growing so you will need a big pot.

3. A white standard rose, symbolising innocence. This could be underplanted with other plants that have symbolic meaning: bellflowers (campanula) for loss, snowdrops, for consolation or hope.

Alternatively, for something much more contemporary, you could try a cloud-pruned tree. These can be very, very beautiful and are mostly evergreen, which is an age-old symbol for renewal in the toughest of winters.

flowers flowers flowers for you.

SugarPlumTree Sun 14-Jun-15 15:09:07

So sorry you are posting under these circumstances flowers

As Shovetheholly said, depends what style you prefer. On the roses front I have a lovely David Austin white rose called Tranquillity in memory of someone and I'm about to wrap a rose called Jean Mermoz that a few of us are giving to a friend tomorrow in memory of her Mum.

inamaymaybewrong Sun 14-Jun-15 19:31:45

Thanks so much for these helpful and thoughtful suggestions, and for your sympathies. I'm really touched. Knowing the meaning behind the flowers suggested is wonderful. I'll discuss with my husband later and we'll head to a garden centre tomorrow. I guess they could advise on the right size pot and aftercare etc?

wonkylegs Sun 14-Jun-15 19:45:42

This is a lovely idea - we did this last November but as we are staying here for the next 20yrs + we just went for something planted in the garden. We chose the tree for what it meant to us (there was a connection with the name of the tree and what we had been calling the baby). It is lovely to see it grow.
We have 2 trees that have grown in pots and moved with us over the years: an Acer - deep purple variety exact species escapes me and a Photina Red Robin Standard tree , both have grown and travelled well. The Acer is particularly beautiful , both are over 10years old.

shovetheholly Tue 16-Jun-15 08:04:09

flowers for you also, wonky.

inamaymaybewrong Wed 17-Jun-15 09:54:45

We buried our tiny baby yesterday, in a tiny trinket box, in the base of a lovely terracotta pot in which we planted a pieris 'forest flame'. We loved the white roses and the camellias we saw but both DH and I really liked the idea of something evergreen with year round colour. The forest flame is so striking. Thanks again for the thoughtful suggestions.

inamaymaybewrong Wed 17-Jun-15 09:55:21

Sorry for your loss(es) too Wonky. x

Trooperslane Wed 17-Jun-15 10:04:05

Thanks for this thread, op.

I've been wondering the same thing too.

shovetheholly Wed 17-Jun-15 10:18:53

flowers flowers flowers for all of you going through these losses.

inamaymaybewrong your pot sounds lovely and very beautiful and fitting.

agoodbook Wed 17-Jun-15 11:06:19

I am so glad you have found something you both love - its a beautiful plant

funnyperson Wed 17-Jun-15 12:53:30

Sorry for your loss flowers
Is it too late to suggest?
I would suggest something which flowers in June- roses are lovely, and a scented rose is nice,
If in a pot, choose a free flowering shrub rose such as Gertrude Jekyll which is pink. Was your baby a boy or girl? Falstaff is a lovely red rose, A Shropshire Lad is a nice yellow rose.
Rosa mundi is an ancient bicolour rose
Although the names of roses are evocative, I think it is nice to go for a rose which looks and smells nice.
Blue flowering trees are ceanothus which flower in April/May.

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