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Crippling fear of failure and how to overcome it

(59 Posts)
LargeLatte Wed 20-Mar-13 10:05:54

It's really bad. If I even do volunteer work I spend about the next 48 hours replaying stuff in my mind analysing if I did something wrong.

I earn a good part time income running my own websites. The money comes from advertising / commission so there is very little interaction with other people or evaluation of my work.

I have been asked on a number of occassions if I would take on some online marketing freelance work. And every time I have chickened out, even though it would pay well and help smooth out the seasonality of my current income.

I feel to scared to even set up my own site explaining what freelance work I can do in case someone I know finds it and laughs about it / confronts me that I am not good enough to do that work.

I really want to get over this because it is holding me back from being my true self, damaging my earning potential and is a pretty terrible example to be setting my children.

But how?

StyleManual Thu 28-Mar-13 11:17:15

Ooh Latte that sounds very fancy! I would have no idea where to start!

AlwaysOneMissing Thu 28-Mar-13 11:38:39

Latte I have no idea what that means grin But good luck with getting it sorted today!

Style that is actually very reassuring, and I bet you are glad you persisted. How did you keep up your motivation during that time? I sometimes think I am never going to get any interest or work, so I am wasting time doing this when there is so much else that needs doing too! (wrt house and DC etc)

My tasks for today are to do some basic website admin eg try to find out why my site does not appear on Google, and how on earth to remove my old site from their searches!! (I have been trying to do this for days though, so I don't hold out much hope of getting it done today!)

LargeLatte Thu 28-Mar-13 12:02:50

Always - it can take weeks for things to get updated with search engines. Google 'how to submit site' and 'how to delist / remove site' and you'll find lots of instructions. It will only take you a few minutes but takes a while to come into affect.

If your old site is Wordpress based, somewhere in the settings should be the option to hide it from search engines. Or you could leave it visible and set up an automatic redirect so anyone typing that URL, or clicking on that link is sent to your new site.

DolomitesDonkey Thu 28-Mar-13 12:24:15

LargeLatte I love feedly and

StyleManual Thu 28-Mar-13 13:04:16

Always - I had a shitty job in a pub, that's how! I had a proper job in my field, then was made redundant overnight. I took the job in the pub with the boss from hell. That kept me pretty motivated. I had a list of agencies and started sending out my CV in the January just after I lost my job. I got my first assignment in the August!

AlwaysOneMissing Thu 28-Mar-13 13:37:13

I admire your tenacity Style and it obviously paid off!

StyleManual Thu 04-Apr-13 13:17:17

Hi all, Our little threads gone a bit quiet hasn't it. Hopefully that's because you're all so busy with work! Well, here's my update anyway...

Today I am updating my CV and also doing a bit of invoicing. I starting reading a book at the weekend about practical advice for people in my profession. It was really helpful and I got some super tips from it.

My sister had a little meltdown at the weekend. She didn't get an interview for a job she really wanted. I tried to give her a little pep talk. What struck me was that after talking to her and my mum it turns out we all feel like failures at interviews/career stuff. And I thought, what are the chances of us all actually being bad at our jobs? It's just the attitude that we share. It's so frustrating when it's someone you love that is saying negative stuff about themselves. She really is so clever and good at her job, but she just talks herself down so badly. I just have to remember that when I start doing it!I don't know how to fix my sister. I guess it's not my job.

Anyway. They're my thoughts for the day.

AlwaysOneMissing Mon 15-Apr-13 09:26:14

It's good to hear you are discovering more about yourself through this process StyleManual and you might be easier on yourself now you can recognise the lack of self belief is a family trait, and not a true reflection on your capabilities.

Unfortunately, I have been quiet as I have not had much going on!
After taking some sound advice from a fellow MNetter, I have made some website changes, and I am planning to introduce a new 'free taster' service which might entice people to making a booking.
I have ordered a new business mobile phone SIM so that I can have a separate number to my personal phone, and once I have that, I can get business cards and flyers etc printed (they are already designed, just awaiting my new phone number to put on them).

I am still really struggling with getting Facebook followers, but Twitter is going much better, and I am slowly building a group of followers who may be able to provide opportunities in the future.

But, as of yet, still no paid work whatsoever blush

I must admit, I am still terrified of failure though. I almost don't want it to take off at all, in case I actually have to see a client and they tell everyone that I am rubbish!! Although it is catch 22, as until I actually start seeing clients, I'm never going to gain any confidence!

How is everyone else doing?

AlwaysOneMissing Wed 08-May-13 09:25:43

How is everyone getting on?

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