Thinking of fostering

[mamaofboys71]

I am thinking of starting the process to become ( initially ) a respite foster carer for the LA. I am a single mum to 2 boys aged 11 & 14 so I would only take children under the age of 6. My boys are happy with the idea, but obviously it's hard for them to conceptualise it. I have thought about it for a few years and now that they are both in secondary school it feels as though they need me less. My biggest issue is that I have no family living locally so would not have any obvious support. I would welcome any advice and to hear whether anyone has used standard paid babysitters for their foster children or whether they need to be assessed too? ( I guess this is for if I moved onto permanent fostering as I wouldn't need this if I was just doing respite).

[kmetsch]

Hi
We’ve been foster Carers for our LA for ten years.
Get in touch with your LA and there’ll be able to advise you.

We started fostering when our birth kids were 6 and 8.

It’s difficult but extremely worthwhile.

I don’t suppose you’re in the North West are you?

[mamaofboys71]

Thanks @kmetsch I've got someone from the LA calling me on Monday for a chat. I went to an info meeting a couple of years ago and decided it wasn't the right time so they didn't think I would need to go to another. I'm in Cornwall. What age of children do you foster? Do you try to keep the age different from your own?

[kmetsch]

We have always tried to make the foster kid the youngest - ideally by about two years.
We have gone ‚permanent‘ - our little man is nearly 13, and came to us when he was 6
It’s the most significant thing we’ve ever done

[chicken853]

I would love to foster.. my DH and I are moving. We have no DC at the moment. What's the process like? Sorry to jump on your post, OP x

[Verily1]

The process is slightly different in every local authority

Usually an open information event then an initial house visit

You need a spare room, police checks, family support preferably

It’s invasive but more foster carers are desperately needed

[mamaofboys71]

I had a really long ( 2 hour!) phone call with the fostering team on Monday. The biggest pain in the application for me is that I lived and travelled abroad for 5 years and I need to get a police certificate from each country. This could be pricey and take some time! Also every address I have lived at since I was 16! that's going to taken some time to work out as I have moved a lot. The woman I spoke to seemed to be trying quite hard to put me off whilst telling me they were desperately short of foster carers at the same time. I was trying to get from her whether she thought it was worth me applying, given I am a single parent and would be reliant on tax credits in order to be at home with foster kids. So, in theory I am hearing that it is ok to be a single parent and in theory ok to be in rented accommodation, but they would rather you had another income which would rule me out as a single carer. I finished the call quite confused to be honest!

[kmetsch]

Hi
Did you phone the Council or an Agency?

[mamaofboys71]

The council. I did look into agencies some years ago, but as I want to foster younger children was advised the council would be better. Do you foster with an agency?

[mamaofboys71]

Amazing that you've had a little boy with you for so long @kmetsch. It is obviously working out well for you!

[Verily1]

The difficulty with being a sole FC is that what will you do for income when you dont have a child with you.

[GinisLife]

I'm a foster carer through an agency and I work from home full time. I started out as a respite carer but having had 2 children one weekend a month for 4 months I ended up with the first one permanently in the 5th month and he's been here 3.5 years now. You might be better speaking to an agency and having one of their SW out to see you although you're more likely to get respite placements from the LA I'd have thought. I'd recommend having a fc as the youngest as well. They can come with a lot of trauma and bad behaviours which need to be dealt with kindly. It's not naughty, it's fear. Buy the A-Z book by Sarah Naish and read up on why they do things and join the Therapeutic Parenting FB group. Attachment trauma is a big issue for these kids. But do it. Fostering is life changing - for them as well as you and I have no regrets.

[Sonia111]

Younger children are generally placed with LA carers, but thats really changing. We are seeing independent providers being used increasingly for younger children, so I'd definitely suggest contacting an agency. Whilst they would still require you to go through the same hoops to qualify, they generally tend to be better at supporting with that sort of thing. A positive factor is that Cornwall is a great LA to work with when it comes to children in care. They work really well with agencies and focus on matching children to the right carers regardless of who they foster for.

[RSM79]

I work for a fostering agency. My wife and I have been full time foster carers for almost 6 years now. We saw a big change in this period, where at first we were never offered younger children. However, now we would only have to wait a few weeks between placements if we wanted to take younger siblings. Agency outings and events such as the Christmas party are now full of younger children. At the moment we have a 10 year old and 12 year old brother and sister in placement, plus we have three of our own children aged 6, 6 and 9.
I am the main carer (carer 1). I transport them to school, communicate with the social workers, attend meetings and manage their homework etc, whereas my wife focuses on our birth children, so things don't get confused.
Private agencies pay well enough for us to manage on the savings we make between placements, although we don't have a mortgage. Local authorities don't pay anything. What they provide would not even cover the costs of having a child in placement. It is worth mentioning that Foster carers are self-employed and you will receive working tax credits. Your income is mainly considered as being not counted towards tax, as most is considered an allowance for the child and about a third is taxable. Therefore as a foster carer you are very very unlikely to pay an tax at all. Unless you work for an agency and have 5 kids placed you will have to declare your income as zero every year. You will also qualify for free NHS treatment and prescriptions as your taxable income is low/zero.

[StudentF0sterer]

Afternoon everyone. I am a Family and Child MSc student at the University of Chester, currently recruiting foster carers to take part in my online survey exploring personal characteristics and motivations to foster. I would really appreciate it if some of you could help me out. Here is the link to the online survey if anyone is interested:

chester.onlinesurveys.ac.uk/foster-carers-motivation-and-cessation

Thank you in advance!