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christmas 2015(8 Posts)
Merry Christmas foster carers, i hope you and your lac had a great day.
Ours went very much to plan, kids loved their pressies and we had a huge christmas dinner and most important NO dramas, probably the first time ever!
How did your lac cope?
That's great :-)
We're recently approved, and although we'd been told we probably wouldn't have a child over Christmas, I thought we'd best just make preparations just in case!
Nobody turned up, which is good, as we'd have been their last resort as new carers, I'm sure, so at least someone wasn't having a horrible Christmas. However, we do now have a selection of presents for various age groups. I'm considering opening one of the Playdoh sets....
lol, hang onto them, tuesday as the first working day could bring children into care, we have had a placement made several times between christmas and new year, its a stressful time for families
This was our second Christmas with our 2 foster children. Lovely day and the kids loved their presents. I had foreseen that they would end up with absolutely loads of stuff so I didn't go overboard on gifts from us and Santa, but they had masses of stuff from my family as well as quite a few from their mum and dad. I seriously think we might need to move house to fit it all in!
The only slightly negative thing happened a few days before Christmas, after seeing their dad. They came home beaming, bringing lots of unopened presents with them and a few hours later my eldest started asking to live with his dad. He knows he's with us long term but said his dad was going to ask if he could live with him again, and had promised him all sorts of stuff, and got quite upset when I told him that he wouldn't be allowed and is staying here. I know it's normal for LAC to want their parents, but he started calling me mum about 3 months ago, and is so settled with us I couldn't help feeling a bit upset (though I didn't show him I was upset).
My little one sometimes says they are going home, I don't tell them they can't I tell them that they can when they are older and able to look after themselves.
When they are older they will fully understand the reasons they are with us.
They talk about when they are older and when I am looking after their children when that are at work so they do understand that they are with us forever.
I think it's just a fleeting idea that comes into their head now and then as they are very settled.
There is a strong bond between parent and child. You must make sure that dad isn't giving him mixed messages though.
Yes I get the "when am I going home?" question after contact. Mum has been told often - to the point of supervisors threatening to stop contact - that she isn't to even raise the subject with LO, but can't seem to stop herself.
I was discussing Christmas with FC with another carer on Boxing Day and wondered if we were the only people in the country spending the day washing through brand new clothes (parents are heavy smokers) and discreetly removing duplicate presents for returning to the shops - nevermind buying presents they knew WE had bought for the kids, this year mum, Aunty and Grandma all bought the same doll! They have contact together, surely they spoke beforehand???
Our kids were OK - the little one found it all very unsettling and became very aggressive and hostile.
The older one really surprised us, and has started to thaw! AFter 7 months of feeling we have a guest in the house, she finally decided we were her family. Today she played with her 3d printer pen, and the first thing she made was a heart shape for me... (leaking eyes here).
I've also had 2 cuddles and she came and sat on my lap on Christmas evening. She also asked if we could do something "as a family" Bless her!
We exchanged gifts with some siblings, but received nothing at all from extended family.
Well my last Christmas as a foster carer as have decided to resign. My last lad leaves next week. So Christmas was lovely and very chilled sharing food and gifts. And then lad went out .... And after getting assaulted, going missing and getting arrested was finally brought home here at 2am. Not a great ending but these things seem to happen to him on a regular basis so not a huge surprise. Love him dearly though and will miss him greatly
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