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Fostering and background checks.

(5 Posts)
2468A Thu 18-Jun-15 12:16:34

We are in an ideal position to foster. DC are right age to understand, financially secure, and pretty much raring and ready to go.

My biggest worry/concern and the one thing that keeps stopping me from making that first move is my family background.

I have limited contact with my mother due to her unpredictable behaviour, our children at the request of my husband and them themselves have no contact with her. My sister & brother have been no contact for 15 yrs as has my mother and brother, its actually 20 for them. blush I have absolutely no idea where my Father is and my brother has a big drink problem and has endless run in's with the police due to this and no steady employment as lurches from one job to another. He has children but all living apart from him.

This sounds so bad just reading it back never mind having to explain it to someone i want to convince i can be a great foster mum.

My husband and i have a steady marriage, we have two children who are doing brilliantly at school and the oldest is in full time employment. I have absolutely no worries about my little family but my extended family is shattered.

I don't suppose every foster family is perfect but will my family background go against us?

Husbands family are modern day Waltons.

Bubble12345 Sat 20-Jun-15 08:36:42

We have started the fostering assessment and I'm pretty much in the same position as you regarding my extended family. No contact with my mother (or any other member of my extended family come to that) for a number of years!
I'm led to believe that it's only a problem if people who would have contact with fc have a problematic background (drugs, violence etc).
I was told that coming from a broken family could mean that I have more empathy with the teenagers we are hoping to foster.
You have nothing to lose from making that initial enquiry.

wonderpants Sat 20-Jun-15 10:26:19

In all honesty, I think the modern day Waltons might worry them more! grin

wonderpants Sat 20-Jun-15 10:28:15

Sorry, should explain that!

Being able to talk about your family, it's difficulties, how you overcome them gives you understanding, empathy and strength.

If you have no understanding of the difficulties many families have, that is a weakness as you will have no experience of dealing with them.

Gymbob Sat 20-Jun-15 15:34:52

you should hear my family history, and mine is direct family, in the same house as me, not extended. it would make your hair curl then drop outgrin

seriously, my history is so bad that nobody knows except social services. they were so understanding and grown up about it, and said that our life experience as a family is greater than most families accumulate over a life time. they thought it could only benefit our foster children.

I think the same will apply to you, best of luck thanks

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