My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on fostering.

Fostering

Would any SW move a child on Christmas Eve?

5 replies

Fosterangel · 19/12/2012 17:07

We have waited a year for a teenager in placement with us to be moved. This child has been unable to settle in foster care with us (although the sibling is very happy and settled). We have constantly been told that there were no single places among the LA carers (we were told that this child needed to be placed as an only child in any home she moves to) and we would just have to be patient until an LA fostering family stepped forwards.

We were told yesterday that this teen is to be moved on Christmas Eve!
Her sibling is confused now that things are sinking in as they have never been apart at Christmas.

I cannot believe that our LA would do the two things they said they would not do: 1. move this child over Christmas and 2. move her where she will not be an only child (this family have another younger child in placement).

Still reeling from the shock but keeping my "happy face" on so the child does not pick up on my upset.

I never thought fostering would be so painful.

OP posts:
Report
LoopsInHoops · 19/12/2012 17:10

Not a foster carer, but an ex foster child.

To be honest, yes they would. But can you request them to rethink? It would be easier for them and the new carers, not to mention the kids, for them to delay by a week or two.

May I ask, to what extent are they not settling? Is it bad enough to warrant this, or would a few week's reprieve be welcome?

Report
Fosterangel · 19/12/2012 17:35

Hi Loops.

To be fair the child was given a choice to go to the new family either on Christmas Eve or the day after Boxing Day and it was the child that chose Christmas Eve. I guess when you have been let down by adults your whole life it is easier and less painful to run away rather than join in with family life. Or it may be that our family is just not what the child needs right now.


So sad. Social Services will not re-think as the child was given a choice and chose Christmas Eve. I just cannot believe that they would feel this appropriate as she has been with us nearly 3years.

OP posts:
Report
CajaDeLaMemoria · 19/12/2012 17:41

I was moved on Christmas Eve twice.

To be honest, Christmas isn't really that special if you feel like you are a spare part thats been tacked on to someone's family. It still isn't that special to me now. I had no problems being moved on 24th December for that reason - it wasn't a special date for me.

Report
Fosterangel · 19/12/2012 20:15

Caja & Loops: Thanks for your comments. It helps.

Have planned a lovely meal out for the foster child on Saturday night at a family restaurant that the foster teen likes so we will all have a decent goodbye for her.

Things are looking a bit better now.

OP posts:
Report
Gymbob · 23/12/2012 22:40

Just been thru a similar situation in our house. So sad that Xmas is when foster children are moved to new placements. It's no fault of his own at all, and he has regressed and become withdrawn. I am still cross that he has been moved 8 days before Xmas.

Bad practice in anyone's book. As long as there is a head on a bed they don't seem to care.

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.