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NP birthday

(14 Posts)
MissVerinder Thu 28-Jul-11 14:41:28

Small question- it's lo's np's birthday soon, is a box of chocs and some smellies with a special card ok for a pressie? Have got a framed pic of lo as well, and a card from me, dp and dd.

p99gmb Thu 28-Jul-11 15:42:24

that sounds similar to what we did.... smile so i blinkin' hope so!!

psiloveyou Fri 29-Jul-11 12:43:18

That's pretty much what we do I think it's fine. I struggle with it because they never get the dc even a card for their birthdays. I will be the bigger person though grin and the LOs love to take a present.

NanaNina Fri 29-Jul-11 14:14:25

Oh what lovely foster carers you are - to be honest I haven't known many foster carers who would send anything to a NP - in fact one foster carer sort of told me off because I gave the NM a christmas cake!

mumsiepie Fri 29-Jul-11 18:11:19

I usually give photo frames or a cake or something like that. Present fc has so many full and half siblings, parents, grandparents and a close circle of aunties and uncles!!

psiloveyou Sat 30-Jul-11 17:58:15

It can cost. I buy for 4 adults and 3 siblings Christmas and birthdays. I do it for relatives of my own dc so not to do it for the fc would be really unfair.

MissVerinder Sat 30-Jul-11 22:09:34

Phew. I didn't want to go over the top, because I've had to buy FC loads of new clothes/shoes as she came with nothing wearable, so I didn't ant her to think I was being "funny" because I reckon the clothes thing upset her. She was pleased with it though smile

NanaNina Sat 30-Jul-11 22:40:48

Did you not receive a clothing allowance Miss Verinder - if not you certainly should have received an initial clothing allowance when the child was placed. Strikes me that there are some LAs who are treating carers very badly.

psiloveyou - I am amazed at your generosity of spirit and money!!

psiloveyou Sun 31-Jul-11 12:43:15

Thats nice NanaNina but I don't think I am financially generous. I really think the allowance we get more than covers the cost of a few family presents. Christmas, birthdays and holidays we spend way over the money SS give us. Over a year though I think it probably evens out in our favour if I'm honest. I certainly don't think it costs £150 a week to keep an eight year old.
We went on holiday once with a friend who is also a FC. She gave the dc a £10 allowance at the start of the week. Out of that they had to buy all their own drinks, ice-creams and anything else she didn't think was an absolute essential. She kept track of their spending in a book. When the money was gone they got nothing else. We were on a really cheap weeks camping for which She had received nearly £600 holiday allowance, I was really shock and sad for them. Even more upsetting was the fact she didn't take one photo so they had no memories of the holiday.

scarlet5tyger Mon 01-Aug-11 20:04:33

£600 holiday allowance???!!! I had to fight to get £35.00!!

My current placement came with nothing except a couple of grubby old vests and t-shirts but my LA won't pay out clothing allowances unless they come with nothing at all.

I always give big photos in nice frames as presents but agree that I sometimes give them through gritted teeth - especially when I receive a list of complaints from parents just before I hand them over! wink

p99gmb Mon 01-Aug-11 21:07:23

If/When we take our 2 LO's (2 & 3) abroad, we'll get minimum £450 towards the cost and our SSW said that if we send her our total bill (prob £2k) she'll fight for us to get more!!!

It amazes me constantly how unfair/different each LA is... confused

Its our annual review this month, (our first - a year !! how time fly's) and as we've done some of our 'essential training' we get a £500 bonus!! Pity we never have time to spend it.. probably go towards the hol...

Think we really dropped on a brill LA smile

bonnieslilsister Mon 01-Aug-11 21:34:04

Where are you p99gmb? Can you say? In our la we get £250 as holiday allowance, I am having 2 children for respite for just over 3 weeks and wish I had the nerve to ask for half the allowance because we will be spending a lot on doing things as they will be away from their friends and at a loose end.

p99gmb Mon 01-Aug-11 21:45:50

In the North West of UK if that helps.. can be more specific if you pm me...

Just re-read my post and wanted to make it clear that it is £450 for the '2' LO's...

Our SSW said that in the office, they are constantly amazed at people making claims for holiday expenses taking LO's to the carribean and other 'exoctic' places and them being approved for more she wants to put a good case forward for us taking them to the Canaries during half term!!! I would rather they spent the xtra money on other things to be honest, but if I can really treat the kids and not count pennies then I'll accept it gladly...

MissVerinder Wed 03-Aug-11 16:15:36

Nananina, we're with an IFA so we don't get a clothing allowance which is fair enough. It was pitiful, the stuff she came with sad

We got to take her on holiday though, and took loads of pictures, some of which are now up around the house. She is truly a little angel. I love her to bits x

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