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Looking for advice re nephew's mum, mental health issues.

(2 Posts)
greencolorpack Fri 27-May-11 10:07:52

How do you go about getting a book or information about this subject... "Your mum is not responsive to you and she doesn't look after you and she's not good at asking how your day went because she's on anti-psychotic medication and it makes her very unresponsive but also stops her from extremes of rage/anger, which in the past used to lead to her being physically abusive."

My nephew lives with my family and he used to live with his Nana. He always saw a lot of him mum, she is a calm and happy presence in his life, but she is so unresponsive. If she comes to see him she wants to leave after 20 minutes cos she's bored.

Nana did her best to raise my nephew, but she used him as a pint-sized sounding board, talked to him about adult decisions and made him precocious and gave him things to deal with he couldn't cope with because of his age, he's 10. She also ran down his mum to him the whole time, putting her down in front of him, and accusing her on a regular basis "Why can't you be normal???" Which was probably borne of frustration and unhappiness, but was not helpful from my nephew's point of view. I don't think Nana ever sat dn down and said to him "This is why your Mum is the way she is." All he has heard is either Nana being staunchly and guiltily defensive about his mum, or slagging her off for not being more normal. When dn came to live with us we agreed on a list of "taboo subjects" which included "We will never run down your parents to you/each other/nana". We've kept to it most of the time. I had parents who slagged each other off quite bitterly to me the whole time and I was sick of it. So we are trying not to do that.

I've done my best with library books, trying to find information, the closest is books about "Some children live with granny... some children live with aunts and uncles" and nothing more tailored to the son of someone with mental health issues.

maypole1 Fri 27-May-11 17:05:59

Try all kinds of families

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