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Does anyone else find the last 4weeks the hardest of the tour...

(10 Posts)
twoplusone Mon 28-Jul-08 20:08:35

I have 3weeks and 1 day then the 6.5month tour is over..
But I feel worse about his part of the tour than I have rest. I have had enough of the children, constantly at my feet, and mam mam mam mam mam, canI do this , mam can I have this, mam were s, mam ...
My eldest is at her fathers so i just have the two boys but the 4 year old is with me constantly, I know he is feeling insecure, how do I do it. i am not getting 5 mins break, at the mo.. he wont go to bed until I do.. constantley up and down until I am in bed then as soon as I get up he is there. I know he is missing his dad andit isnt his fault, but I HAVE HAD ENOGH.. I really am at my wits end, once in the house I just sit and cry as i really cant face it anymore... Everything is a battle with him.. Then when the baby who has just turned one is awake, I cant leave him in a room as he cries for me, and if he is playing i still cant leave the room to do anything as ds1 will push hi, hit him jump on him...

As i tyoe both boys who I have been trying to get to sleep for 2 hrs are in the background, and I am ih tears.....

Am I the only one who feels like a crap mum and useless, and a none coper...My temper is on a 3second fuse at the momnet...

Sorry I just need to off load.. and the fact that I havent heard from hubby in a week is making me more upset too... Oh and the thought of the move in 4weeks... and the house..etc.etc.etc.

twoplusone Mon 28-Jul-08 20:10:41

Now my four year old has just gone pstairs crying his eyes out because i have shouted at him and all because I HAVE HAD ENOUGH, it isnt his fault, but i really cant do it .... I need ME TIME and SPACE.. am I really the bad mum that I think I am.

twoplusone Mon 28-Jul-08 22:25:23

Only me then that has turned into a phsyco, and quivering wreck.. i do feel alot calmer now both boys have eventually gone down.. but no housework or packing has been done as too tired.. will have to try for tommorrow night !!!!

Sorry to have a rant....... but as I said earlier i just needed to let it all out.xx

twoplusone Tue 29-Jul-08 06:43:23

OMG.. just read postagain, I am feeling better this morning.. I do Love my children honestley.... I just think we are dready for daddy to come home, Esp ds1.. he is a mans amn, and the health visitor is convinced he is punishim me for daddy being away..

The post was ment to be more along the lines of, being tired, thwe time really dragging now we are on count down, and how much I am missing adult conversation etc.

I am so sorrry about that rant, I need to pull myself together for the last 3weeks.. I am flying hom on sunday for 4 days as I ( and againm after that post I defo) need a break from the patch, and a little time for myself.. even if i just get a few hrs each day for teh 4days, and some decent sleep.

SammyC Tue 29-Jul-08 08:41:13

I get the same, I also seem worse with pmt which makes things so hard, esp coping when on your own x

Enjoy your break at home and get as much space as you can, I find even an hour dpoing something for me makes all the difference x

Chin up you are doing a grand job xx

twoplusone Tue 29-Jul-08 13:13:30

Thank you sammyc..

I am going to enjoy myself.. and I think I am going to leave ds1 there for 11days then he can come back with his pops..(see my other thread) I do ffeel guilty but I think I need it as does he.

Oh and my period started last night, which i also think didnt help my mood or temper... my poor kids.. lthey are living with a madwoman at the mo... bless them .lol

SammyC Wed 30-Jul-08 21:43:48

I am a PMT monster..........fully understand! I think I may need medical help with it in all seriousness!

Enjoy the break and both of you will be refreshed (well as much as you can after a move!!!)on his return, it will do you the world of good x

Good Luck with things xx

mamarach Wed 30-Jul-08 22:44:30

hang in there
tours are so so hard on those back home, relentless childcare is tough, as is the worry, AND the fall-out after they're back.
You'll get through, and you've done an amazing job already...you're a strong woman!
keep smiling and be as patient as poss when he gets back. There'll be some tricky moments but you'll get there!
good luck

twoplusone Thu 31-Jul-08 07:57:05

Thank you both so much.. xx

kerryk Tue 19-Aug-08 10:18:49

just seen this, is he back yet?

i find the first two weeks the worst because you have such a long time till they are home there is no point even thinking about it. then the last two weeks just drag by, you are constantly trying to get things ready and the kids are going around behind you undoing all your hard work grin

also unlike most single parents we are miles/countries away from our old friends and family so support can be hard if you are new to a area and have not met new people yet.

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