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Ok which way around would you do this...

(6 Posts)
Newtothisstuff Tue 14-Aug-12 13:56:05

It's good you have a choice my dh wasn't around for the first year and a half of my dd's life

goodygumdrops Sun 12-Aug-12 20:22:27

Both are crap but i think it will be so much better for him to be around after the birth. it will be horrible for him to go straight after. I know that doesn't immediately help YOU.but for him i think it must be the better option x

AlfieBear87 Sun 12-Aug-12 19:59:58

All our family live miles away although mil doesn't work so I'm sure she'd be happy to come and stay for a while.

I know really that it'd be better to have him around after, but I am such a massive lightweight when it comes to being pregnant I can't imagine having to go through it without him here. It's times like this I hate being a military wife!!!

JustFabulous Sun 12-Aug-12 19:55:33

Definitely have him around when the baby is here.

Take it as easy as you can with your toddler. Accept all offers of help.

It is a lot for him to miss the first months of the new baby's life and you will want him around for the labour, etc.

PedroPonyLikesCrisps Sun 12-Aug-12 19:52:51

Wow, quite a dilemma, but I reckon he's gonna be more useful after the birth. I only have one DC, but knowing how much more DW needed me after DS was born and how much I bonded with him in the early months, I would definitely get it out the way now if he has to go at all. Do you have family or friends near who can help if you need them during the pregnancy?

AlfieBear87 Sun 12-Aug-12 19:42:11

I'm currently pregnant with dc2. Baby is due in march/April 2013. Hubby is due to go away in late Oct for 4 months. So basically I'll be 8 months pregnant by the time he gets back. Technically he's not supposed to be sent away for the 3 months before baby is due but will be unless he kicks up a stuff about it.

I struggle a lot in pregnancy, last time I couldn't walk by 35 weeks due to crap hips. So we could ask for his deployment to be put off until baby arrives, or just get it out of the way now so he'll have a good 18 months at home with both dc before he goes away again.

So what do you think is worse - no husband during crappy pregnancy whilst having to chase around after dc1 or no husband after birth with newborn and 16 mo to look after?!

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