How do you cope when your DP is away?(6 Posts)
My dh left Tuesday. The first weeks are the hardest. Ds was upset the first night too and usually is like it when he is tired.
Keep busy! Plan some nice activities for both of you. do you have skype?
I watch loads of trash tv and mumsnet.
Knuckle down and crack on - that's what I do. He has been working away for the past eighteen months (comes home every two or three weeks for a weekend) and in Nov or Dec will be heading off to dusty climes for a few months.
So, I cope by looking after the children, keeping the house clean and carrying on exactly as I would do if he were here.
My ds copes by talking about him constantly, but my dd copes by not talking about him as then she remembers how much she misses him. I cope by keeping busy, sticking to a routine for sanity, and the thought of sleeping starfish in the big double bed! Try it, it's the best sleeping position lol
And then you have the looking forward to him coming home, the ultimate best bit, I can honestly say, and it makes you realise why you fell in love with them in the first place!
If I'm honest, the first few weeks I'm in pieces too!
You miss all the 'normal' things, you feel you're constantly forgetting something (them!) and your mood sucks... then all of a sudden you just seem to slip into your own little pattern and things just seem normal.
Its really hard but for me I just do one day at a time, plan things to fill your time, one thing each day to do, just a simple task that you've been meaning to get round to doing. Soon fills your time up and gets you into the habit of doing everything yourself!
Each night I'd sit down and think 'Great, another day done!'
During the week it wasn't too bad as there were plenty of things to do but weekends were the hardest cos everyone else seems to have a life planned and we were just floating around!
Plan to see friends or family on the weekends rather than during the week if you can.
As for DC missing them... be consistent.
I don't know how old your DD is but with DS we told him as much as he could understand.
'Daddy's had to go away, he's going to be back in x amout of time so we have to look after everything til he's home.'
Every time he asked for Daddy I'd tell him the same thing 'He's working away and can't get home just yet, once he's finished his work he'll get on an plane and come straight home.'
Every night at bedtime DS would open my bedroom window and shout 'Night night Daddy, I love you!' to the moon, because Daddy can see the same moon and he can hear him shouting. Then when DH managed to call home he would always mention hearing DS shouting 'night night'. Makes them feel a bit closer!
Some nights, if he was having a really hard time he'd take one of DHs hoodies to bed and snuggle into it all night! Whatever gets them through.
I can totally sympathise, that first night is awful, it does get easier though.
How far away is he working?
Have you got regular contact?
I second MN, crap tv and starfish sleeping! All three got me through the nights!
Hope that makes sense? I'm tired and not entirely sure if I'm making much sense!? lol
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