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Why do people harp on and on and on about instilling the sort of eating habits in their kids that they would never dream of maintaining themselves???

(63 Posts)
moondog Tue 22-Sep-09 15:40:20

You know, being genuinely amazed that a 2 year old won't ingest his own bodyweight in cucumber and carrot batons?

To say nothing of the teachers who blindly endorse 'healthy eating' then waddle to the stafffroom and get in a fight with a packet of Hobnobs.

Oh and so bloody what if your kid only eats about 5 or 6 different things. Don't we all??? Anyway, whatever you eat, it's a variation on theme of protein, fat and carbohydrate.

So, start banging on about it/forcing them to eat/making smiley pizzas/buying ridiculous cookbooks and just leave them be

fiercebadrabbit Tue 22-Sep-09 15:50:59

Totally agree, Moondog

I hate bananas, can't stand even to be in the room as someone eating them (the smell makes me gag). Given I run from the room, blenching, when one is produced I'm on pretty thin ice naggind dd1 to eat broccoli.

And even though I am quite skinny (just genes) I can't get through the day without a fistful of chocolate. So how can I ban all sweeties, like many of my acquaintance?

If they see you eating and enjoying a mixed and varied diet, they will get there in the end - but it will be from discovering the pleasure people get from all sorts of different foods, rather than from nagging and hiding pureed sweet potato in their bolognese sauce

TheFoosa Tue 22-Sep-09 15:54:07

my dd can spot a hidden vegetable at 10 paces

I've given up trying or feeling guilty about it

bamboobutton Tue 22-Sep-09 15:57:16

ive given up feeling bad about it too.

tonight ds is having scampi, oven chips and babycorn because i'm too tired to think let alone cook organic stuff from scratch.

amtooyoungforthis Tue 22-Sep-09 15:58:19

Absolutely agree!

No matter what you feed them as a infant/toddler/child, once they get to secondary school, sweetshop/chipshop is their biggest friend. Then they reach 18 and and booze with a kebab chaser is the only way to eat

I've always gone with everything in moderation, if you don't like what is served..don't let me serve it but don't expect anything else you can't get yourself. We always have baked beans and on that!

Always had a sweet box and a biscuit tin but always had fruit on hand, they take what they fancy at the time

I have 4 skinny teens with perfect teeth, who will eat anything and everything

Food should never be an issue

TheMightyToosh Tue 22-Sep-09 16:03:18

Personally, I don't think that trying to instill healthy habits in your DCs is worthy of quite such a slating!!

Everyone knows that a varied diet is important, so where's the harm in trying to encourage that in your children?

Can't help thinking that this is a direct attack on another thread innocently asking for advice on how to get a fussy eater to broaden their diet a bit. Nothing to do with cooking organic from scratch or eating their own body weight in carrots at all. Just caring parents wanting to give their kids the best start in life that they can. What the hell is wrong with that??

booyhoo Tue 22-Sep-09 16:05:09

wish my OH felt the same.

as i child who was sometimes forced to eat certain things to the point of tears i hate anyone insisting a child clears their plate.

OH would gladly eat a scabby horse and doesnt understand how i dont like certain things.

dinner time can be a bit stressful in our house at times.

alwayslookingforanswers Tue 22-Sep-09 16:06:33

absolutely agree

I refuse to feel at all guilty that my DS's haven't had "healthy" meals over the last week.. They've eaten, they've felt full, I don't care that 2 days it was microwave meals, another night it was takeaway pizza (although that was a birthday treat), and generally quite bizarre meals made up of whatever I could cope with cooking.

They've also eaten loads more biscuits and dry pasta (DS3) that usual and an assortment of other crap.

But hell they're being fed - I'm not even mananging to eat much myself yet so how can I force myself to stand there and make them lentil burgers when they're seeing me living on toast and nutrition drinks.

thedollshouse Tue 22-Sep-09 16:10:08

I agree with the comment about teachers and that goes for health professionals too.

I work in a nursery and some of the teachers are critical of the lunches that the children bring and yet the staffroom is jam packed with cakes and chocolates etc. The other thing that gets me is children are not allowed chocolate or cakes in their packed lunches because the school has healthy eating status and yet the menu for children having school lunches includes chocolate pudding and jam roly poly. hmm

moondog Tue 22-Sep-09 16:10:31

Hang on, I'm not endorsing eating crap.Far from it!!
If you eat crap and your kids do too, that's between you and your conscience. I am merely pointing out that trying to establish a regime of some sort that is different to yours is doomed to failure.

What thread are you talking about Toosh?

There are millions of threads onMN like this.

moondog Tue 22-Sep-09 16:11:16

Yes Doll, I note that too.
I'd prefer my kid didn't have pudding at school. She doesn't at home.

sheeplikessleep Tue 22-Sep-09 16:16:51

Agree totally with Mightytoosh.
I think this is quite a mean thread if it is in response to the another thread.
There is a balance between not getting hung up about food against trying to get a range of food groups in our dc (i'm not disputing we don't eat crap, but I wouldn't be happy if my dc ate crap all day every day).
It can also be incredibly stressful if your child is refusing whole food groups and for a period of time.
I don't see why you're offended by someone (if you are, maybe the timing of this thread is completely coincidental) seeking some form of advice or help to manage that in a constructive way?

TheMightyToosh Tue 22-Sep-09 16:19:02

moondog - ok, I must have missed the finer points there. I see what you are saying about being hypocritical and trying to enforce rules that you don't follow yourself.

But maybe those parents put more effort into their child's diet than into their own, because they are short on time and are happy to make an effort for their children's meals, but by the time it comes to their own, they are so exhausted they just throw a frozen pizza in the oven. Some people just have higher standards for their kids than they do for themselves. Similar to spending more on their kids' clothes than on their own. The children are the priority. I don't think it means they are sadistically trying to force cabbage down them and then exchanging evil grins while the share a galaxy bar after the children are in bed!!

Your comments on hiding veg and making pizzas were very similar to another thread that started today "I have completely failed to give DD1 good eating habits - please advise" (sorry, haven't figured out how to link yet). Just seemed quite a coincidence, that's all

sheeplikessleep Tue 22-Sep-09 16:20:25

this thread?

TheMightyToosh Tue 22-Sep-09 16:21:07

Yes thanks Sheep - so not just me who spotted the similarities then (phew!)

sheeplikessleep Tue 22-Sep-09 16:22:28

Was this a coincidence moondog?

stillstanding Tue 22-Sep-09 16:24:47

I think people do this because they recognise that their own habits are crap and want better for their DCs. This is A Good Thing. But not if they make turkey twizzlers and chips for themselves and carrot batons for their DCs. Only really works if you are a good role model.

I also think that the thinking goes that as a parent you are responsible for ensuring that your DCs eat as best as they can especially while their young bodies are growing but that once they are adults they can make all the same crap choices that you make.

castille Tue 22-Sep-09 16:36:28

I get your point that parents who eat badly can't expect their children to grow up with a healthy attitude to food.

But although setting a good example (most easily achieved by eating the same food, together) is the best starting point, it isn't enough, because nothing is in the battle to get a fussy child to eat well.

There will always be fussy kids whatever parents do.

PrincessToadstool Tue 22-Sep-09 16:40:25

Why not post something supportive to the other OP instead of this snidey bolloocks?

IWantAChickAndADuck Tue 22-Sep-09 16:42:39

"I am merely pointing out that trying to establish a regime of some sort that is different to yours is doomed to failure."

Not the case for me... I don't eat half the stuff that my DS1 does, probably becuase as a child I was fed on pizza and smiley faces and he has been feed on a much more healthy, varied diet. He was eating Greek salad (with olives!) at 18 months... he enjoys alot more fruit/veg because I give him alot more variety and choice, something that I, as a child, didn't get. He eats brown bread because he likes it, I eat white bread because I like it.

I think giving babies and toddlers a varied and helthy diet is so important as it helps them to develop their own individual tastes. My 7 month old's favourite dinner at the moment is tuna avocado and banana... not something I'm fond of but he loves it!

The thing that I think people forget when defending poor choices in diet is that the first few years of a childs life are the most crucial in terms of development and growth, and diet is a massive factor in this.

When their older if they choice to live on take out every night, fine, their choice... but until then I want to know I'm giving them the best possible start. And hopefully

And yes... I do feed them organic wherever possible, because I prefer to eat organic. grin

PortAndLemon Tue 22-Sep-09 16:44:03

Possibly because they are aware how their own eating habits were screwed up by their own parents?

E.g. I was forced to clear my plate at every meal. Partly as a result I find it very difficult to tune into my own feelings of being "satisfied". However, I encourage my DCs to do it. But then my eating issues are around quantity rather than quality.

moondog Tue 22-Sep-09 16:45:54

P&L, that's sort of my point.
We need to leave kids to decide for themselves how much they want of something. Maybe then we would have fewere adults with eating issues.

I've noticed with my ds for example that on some days he barely eats a thing and on others never stops.

alwayslookingforanswers Tue 22-Sep-09 16:47:13

I don't understand why people cook different stuff for their kids. As someone else has said - if they're fussy, they're fussy.

I don't like liver, I'm not going to cook it for my DS's just so that they can "expand" their tastes - there were plenty of foods I discovered after leaving home (though at home we always had fresh, homemade, often homegrown stuff) and there's many foods I haven't yet tried. Don't need to give them everything under the sun while they're still at home, if they want to try it when they're older they will.

Cooking 2 different meals - one for adults, one for children........not in this house.

stillstanding Tue 22-Sep-09 16:50:16

I do agree with that, moondog. I was always made to clear my plate, no leaving the table until etc which I think has led to food ishoos with me (that or my own innate greed!) and am very careful not to do that with my DCs. If they've had enough they've had enough ... although they are obviously not allowed to then fill up with pudding.

moondog Tue 22-Sep-09 16:52:21

I like that.
'If they're fussy, they're fussy'


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