What can I put in school sandwiches that won't kill the children?

[morningpaper]

Ham = bowel cancer
Tuna = mercury poisoning also fish isshoos
Cheese = Too much dairy, breast cancer
Jam = banned

I'm running out of ideas

[gigglewitch]

rat poison?

[gigglewitch]

I got it.
Gravy
Custard
Apple
Banana.

Or all four. Sorted.

[MarthaFarquhar]

you mean you don't make your own lentil and beetroot hummous?

slattern.

[expatinscotland]

hummus.

it won't kill them, but they'll have no friends for farting like trumpets the rest of the afternoon.

[southeastastra]

lettuce or a carrot

[gigglewitch]

oh btw, I got conned by ds2 into doing sausages (err, yes, hot ones, grilled that morning and stored in flask ) last winter.
He desperately wants hot food but has to have packed lunches because of his food intolerances.
I, on the other hand, amd developing a child intolerance

[morningpaper]

hmmm warm hummous isn't exactly a proper sandwich is it?

[morningpaper]

giiglewitch we've been told that hot food in flasks isn't allowed (health and safety)

[gigglewitch]

ffs

You'd better get the school to write a list of what they can have then. Btw, I wouldn't actually recommend that anyone sends sausages in flask a la ds2. Your house stinks of - well - sausage. All day. Bleurgh.

[gigglewitch]

Grass.

[Chevre]

sushi from ethically source fish.

i mean how hard it is to pull together some darling little seaweed and fish swiss rolls in a cath kidston lunch box. you have to think outside the lunch box [tinkly laugh]

[IwishIhadtimetoreadnewspapers]

I know!! We've spent ages getting ds1 to eat ham sandwiches to go in his lunches for school - now what?!

[KembleTwins]

Home grown organic tomatoes?

Mars bars?

[shootfromthehip]

Crisps.

Golden Wonder, cheese and onion crisps. Can't beat it.

[gigglewitch]

don't forget you need to stock up on fruit shoots

[CheeryCherry]

Fresh air! (so long as you live 100km from nearest B road and not on a flight path)

[blametheparents]

Peanut butter

[Paolosgirl]

I resorted to digging sticky Vegemite out of a jar that's been in the fridge for aeons for their sandwiches tonight. Do the same for yours - they'll love you for it!

[TheCrackFox]

Greggs sausage roll inbetween 2 slices of wholemeal bread.

[Shellseeker]

Peanut butter's banned in case someone has an allergy (fair enough), crisps too unhealthy, ditto chocolate biscuits...
beansprouts, anyone?

[GrimmaTheNome]

You mean you're not roasting a joint of beef for their sarnies?

[Shellseeker]

Why is jam banned, btw? Too colourful?

[TheCrackFox]

Beef = too much saturated fat.

How about an organic lettuce sandwich? Don't all children love that kind of food?

[Shellseeker]

But what if the organic lettuce had an organic little slug in it? Are children allowed to eat slugs? Surely the slime content is too high?

[Rachmumoftwo]

By a lettuce sandwich, I do hope you are suggesting using lettuce leaves instead of bread! It is bad for you, you know.