If she is hungry she will eat dd 3 goes through that too, i just say fine leave the table and when she comes back and says she is hungry ... she gets the same plate, she knows she will get nothing else.
i really used to stress about dd1 not eating, but now with dd2 i am more relaxed. i think you stress more with the 1st. but now dd1 will eat loads of stuff, i amazed at how much they can put away if they feel like eating.
I'm with the "they'll eat when they're hungry" thing, and also with the "don't offer anything else".
That being said, DS1 is thin, and I like him eating a varied diet. There are two tricks we find work in our house.
The first is bribery - he can have yogurt (sweetened and plain mixed together), if he eats X amount of his main course. I'm not totally happy with this, as it implies the main course is yucky, and dessert is good. But it does make him eat - and sometimes he doesn't even have room for the dessert, or he doesn't end up liking it.
And the second method is shouting. Not shouting at him to eat, shouting at him not to eat. "Don't you dare eat that! If you eat that, you'll be able to run very fast and I won't be able to catch you!" And then when he eats, I summon up ludicrous amounts of cartoon rage. I shake my fists, I howl, I shout. (Sometimes I stop to giggle. He knows, all the way through, that I'm joking.) This method has got him eating lots of things he wouldn't eat before, like ratatouille, or cabbage.