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2 and half year old son will not use cutlery or eat finger foods.

(4 Posts)
amy90 Fri 04-Apr-14 21:20:10

Wasn't sure where to post this so I've posted it to a few to see what happens.

My son is 2 and a half with suspected autism. (I'm currently trying to have him screened, but nobody seems to be listening to my concerns. Me and my whole family know that he is different and are trying to get help.)

I've tried sitting and eating with him, I've guided his hands, I've tried putting things in his hands, I've tried cutting stuff up, not cutting stuff up, putting tiny bits in his mouth, singing, dancing, ignoring him and eating mine to see if he copies. I've tried leaving him on his own for half an hour to see if he does anything, tv on, tv off, I don't know what else to do. The only finger foods he will eat are: toast, apple cut into very specific shapes, and malted milk biscuits. He won't touch anything else. He won't even pick up any of the cutlery. I've also tried just putting food infront of him with no cutlery to see if he will eventually have a go with his hands, still nothing.

I know it sounds pathetic, but this is really starting to upset me now. I've tried everything. I feel bad for taking his dinner away because I know he's hungry, but I really don't want to spoon feed him anymore when I know that he is MORE than capable of feeding himself. & if I cave in and spoon feed him, I feel like he'll never learn to do it himself.
I don't know what to do. Any advice would be great...rude/stupid comments will be ignored and reported.

ceeveebee Fri 04-Apr-14 21:30:24

I'm sure you have already tried this but as its not specifically mentioned - have you tried putting some food on a fork and leaving it for him to pick up? Maybe try with some of the food he will already pick up eg toast. It's what worked for my DS who didn't start feeding himself until almost 2.

Also my DS loves his 'aeroplane' cutlery

Sorry if I'm suggesting things you've already tried.

PhoebeMcPeePee Fri 04-Apr-14 21:33:40

Is this about textures & possibly the feel of the cutlery/food in his hands?
Would a shopping trip to choose new ones help? I'm not clear from your first post how varied his diet is when spoon fed but it might be worth exploring.

Tbh I'm not surprised you're feeling down this alone sounds really tough without any wider issues being ignored by professionals hmm. I'm sure you have already but is it worth revisiting your gp/HV & getting a referral for a feeding clinic (preferably child specific) and try to get some help as I'm sure this is very common & they would be able to give you coping strategies & practical help.

upupupandaway Fri 04-Apr-14 21:45:51

Don't be to quick to diagnose him. My friends child was a fussy eater/ very odd kid. He's just got his PHD. and no he isn't even on the spectrum. A big gorgeous hunk of a lad and no shortage of lady friends.
Brother was he same,would only eat jam sandwiches, he's a great cook now. sometimes I think it's a lad thing. Does he eat at all? Just don't spoon feed him. He'll eat in his own way when he is hungry. If he doesn't, then is the time to ask for professional advice.

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