I think your first reaction was correct. When he cooks for everyone he can choose the dishes he likes. When you're cooking for everyone you do the same. He isn't fussy btw.. he has disordered eating issues, could be malnourished, and should really see a doctor.
at fruitarian he wont eat fruit either. Its all his bloody mothers fault she admitted that if he didnt want it as a kid she would make him toast or if they were having something he didn't like would make another meal. I refuse to do this for the DC nevermind a grownman. He will eat soup, sandwiches, roast meat oh and roast potatoes amongst other stuffBut I do like your ideas of telling him to do his own. He is blummin worse than a child!
I agree, it's time you stopped pandering, nevermind finding new recipes for him. Make a nice dinner, and tell him he either eats what you've cooked or makes his own. This habit of serving him another dinner in front of the children is setting an awful example.
I wouldn't be able to cope with that at all. Needs to grow up. We had an AP like that once...she didn't last long. she refused fruit and veg - looked v unhealthy and kept having awful colds. Didn't work for us. Your DH's diet sounds dire - apart from being supremely irritating. Good luck OP.