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Going to court with my abuser

(3 Posts)
FrameyMcFrame Tue 05-Nov-13 21:40:30

I will be getting my day in court soon, (on video evidence) with the person who abused me while i was at boarding school 20 years ago. It's taken a long time

FrameyMcFrame Tue 05-Nov-13 21:46:40

oops pressed post too soon.

The thing is I have also remembered abuse from family members at a family party when I was 14.
I was attacked by a female, the wife of my cousin who accused me of seducing her husband (I was 14) in the bathroom. She held me down and pulled my arm back, scratched my face and pulled my hair all the while shouting abuse at me. It was very frightening.
At the same party another cousin forced me into a sexual act, I still see these people but had blocked it out of my mind until the last year or so when the school abuse case came up.
I wonder why it all seemed to happen at the same time, what I'm thinking is was it something I was doing to invite this?

TheBigJessie Thu 05-Dec-13 16:28:05

You weren't doing anything to invite it. You were a young teenager.

How abusers pick their victims is complicated, but I tend to thinknthat abusers prowl, both literally and metaphorically, for people who have already been abused, because they pick up on the fact that you've become accustomed to abusers not respecting you.

THAT DOESN'T MAKE IT YOUR FAULT. It demonstrates how manipulative abusers are, and how they carefully and intentionally scheme beforehand.

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