supersize vs superskinny encourages anorexia

[anorexicdaughter]

hello. my daugher aged 14 has recently become anorexic and obviously we are very distressed as a family. i watched this programme for the first time this week when i realised my daughter is hooked on it, and i was appalled by the irresponsibility of it. my daughter admitted to me that she doesn't relate to the anorexics at all because they are way worse than she is, and the skinny girl in the house this week was taller than her and weighed less but wasn't labelled anorexic as such. my daughter said the images she sees as gross are the ones of the obese people and she lives in fear of becoming like them. my daughter's school has described anorexia as an epidemic right now and they don't know why. i think i just hit on one of the reasons why with this damn programme which should be banned. does anyone have any thoughts as to how to get the message across effectively to channel 4?? much appreciated.

[willsurvivethis]

Well good luck - I complained to Ch4 over a very awful 'joke' made about child sexual abuse and so far (and we are talking weeks) no one has answered.

I'm ashamed to say I lack the brain space and energy to follow it up.

If you specifically want to know about getting through to Ch4 posting it in chat may get you more responses.

[Peaceflower]

My dd (12) was addicted to this too. She watched for tips to see how the skinny one lost weight, and repeated them as a mantra.

I agree there's an epidemic of anorexia, most of the girls are super skinny and on diets. I rarely come across any girl slightly overweight, most appear to be super skinny or very overweight.

I agree it's totally irresponsible, good luck to you. I would support any campaign.

[FiveGoMadInDorset]

But it is not just this programme is it? If you got this banned then she will have access to magazines, websites, peer pressure. It does have good advice on how to treat anorexia.

I am sorry about your daughter.

[MitchyInge]

Sorry to hear about your daughter, mine has been very unwell with it throughout her teens (17 now and in hospital again, though more for the depression which goes hand in hand with it). It does make you incredibly sensitive to these things, every time I see the thread title 'nothing tastes as good as being slim feels' (one of my daughter's earlier mantras) I 'see' her being lifted from bed to wheelchair and wheeled 3 paces to the loo, then back again as she was too frail to stand or take a single step. I can't bear the anti-obesity campaigns in schools that make my whippet-like 10yo anxious about being fat. I wish at least half as much effort went into promoting good emotional and mental health as is spent demonising certain foods and deifying others - people often say so easily 'oh it won't make an overweight child anorexic' but actually it is a risk factor, being overweight in childhood. Or they think it affects such a tiny minority it doesn't matter in the overall scheme of promoting 'healthy' eating, but around 1% of all schoolgirls and older women have anorexia at any one time (clinical knowledge summaries service). Obviously there's no single cause but when you live with this disease it can be hard to take a balanced view of factors known to contribute to yours or your loved one's illness.

But people who struggle with abusing food towards the other end of the spectrum deserve help and support too, I don't really know about this tv programme, whether it is helpful to the people taking part and to viewers who have difficult relationships with food or whether it is some sort of awful freak show. It does sound grotesque.

Sorry to have rambled on but if you want just one piece of advice it would be to look away from the food/body size and shape triggers and issues and work towards verbalising feelings instead.

[MerlinsBeard]

No it doesn'
t encourage Anorexia but if a person has body issues of any type they tend to be drawn to programmes where they can "compare".

Yes there are tips but if you are actively seeking to find them, then simply watching this programme will not prevent those tips being found.

Anorexia is not purely about weight and weight loss. It is about many many things and those things that control it will probably change from day to day.

It is more than an illness, it is a lifestyle that is very very hard to escape from ime.

[MerlinsBeard]

If she is getting her "tips" from this programme, at least she will still be eating rather than some of the pro ana sites i have been on. Some of which suggest that if the "ana voice" becomes too stong, that it would be better to end everything than to eat.

[foureleven]

I am really sorry to hear about your daughter but i dont think its this program that is to blame.
An anorexic will look for advise on getting thinner and evidence of other people that do the same thing anywhere they can. I bet she also scours magazines and cuts out pics of skinny girls, goes on weight loss websites and maybe even pro-ana websites. Then there are the girls at school and often (although I couldnt possibly comment as I dont know you) pressures from family or a mother who is obsesed with dieting - Often actually not even obsessed with dieting but maybe who has made daughter aware of weight issues and passed on an unhealthy relationship with food.

My advise would be ato always watch it with your daughter just so she doesnt think it is something to hide from you.

I agree its a shame that she has been exposed to this program if it has fuelled anorexic tendancies but it will only be one thing in a whole list.

[annoyingdevil]

What really annoys me about the program is the way they allow Anna whatever her name is to obsess so vocally about her size when she clearly has no weight problem

Great message to send out to young women C4

[MitchyInge]

Yes instead of thinking of such things as being to blame, look at what is helpful and what isn't. Even if it was possible it isn't desirable to control every unhelpful influence. You have to put your energy into supporting her emotionally instead, help her develop healthier ways of dealing with whatever thoughts, anxieties and feelings are currently being expressed through food.

[anorexicdaughter]

thanks to all for your thoughts. i realise this programme isn't the cause of her anorexia by a long way, but this current election campaign just proved that tv is a far greater influence on the nation than the press. i still really am convinced the programme has something to do with the anorexia epidemic because of the triggers it can cause in vulnerable people, eg our children. the local camhs clinic where she is being treated used the word 'epidemic' to describe the current situation and they are clearly oversubscribed with cases and therefore i worry she's not getting the full help she really needs. she's not at inpatient stage yet, thank god, because waiting lists for those beds are longer than ever. so i am trying to look at all angles to support her and maybe, yes, i should watch it with her and discuss it with her rather than have her watch in in secret with her dark thoughts. much as it pains me to watch it ever again because i did find it a gross freak show which clearly brings in lots of £££s for channel 4 in ad revenue, so they will defend it to the hilt! thanks also for the comment about the fact the programme does encourage eating, rather than not - that was a shred of comfort for me which i need right now!
i still feel i would like to put in a serious complaint to channel 4, so if anyone knows the route to get something taken seriously please let us know.
good luck and great strength to everyone dealing with this horror with their children.

[MitchyInge]

It was so so hard to get help, inpatient care on NHS just doesn't exist in some parts of UK for young people. There are 10 beds (in Cambridge) for whole of Norfolk, Suffolk, Cambridgeshire, Hertfordshire, Essex, Bedfordshire and Northamptonshire. We are lucky to have them at all. The majority of people who get admitted have, quite literally, come very close to death as a result of their disordered eating. I think there is one outpatient place at that unit. There are serious pitfalls to inpatient treatment though so it should rightly be a last resort.

Hopefully your daughter will make good progress with CAMHS/GP support and it won't come to that. Have you been to any BEAT meetings? We found those useful, should be listed on this page of links. Best of luck.

[anorexicdaughter]

thanks mitchyinge for suggesting the beat meetings. i spoke to their helpline a couple of times when we first realised that my daughter was headed into anorexia but not since. we're only 6 weeks into realising this nightmare so the more help i can get at this early stage the better. i sincerely hope things improve for your daughter soon.

[LouMacca]

Totally agree with your point annoying. Although I like Anna Richardson I think her section of the show is mis-guided and totally inappropriate.

[frankie3]

I agree that this programme is irresponsible. Although the women on this programme are so skinny that they are anorexic, they do not really look that much thinner than models and celebrities in magazines. Many teenage girls will think they look good, not too thin! Also, some of the thin girls are shown eating a diet of junk eg crisps all day, but that is obviously all they eat, they eat no meals. So this could make impressionable girls want to copy this.

[anorexicdaughter]

thanks again to everyone here for their thoughts. i did in fact post the topic on telly addicts and in general health. interesting that the telly addicts folks pretty much told me to keep my thoughts on this wonderful programme to myself and not to darken their forum again. in general health i got a mixed bag of responses but some good pointers on what the real issues are with my daughter. in mental health there is a lot more direct support of my viewpoint and some very helpful comments from people in the same boat. it really indicates that the majority of people without any eating disorder issues in the family will never see my point here, thus the programme will survive and continue to grow in popularity. meanwhile camhs have now pledged my daughter and our family 2 sessions per week with them. so help is at hand and i am grateful. incidentally the psychiatrist brought up the subject of media yesterday in our family session and i told him my views on this programme and he described the programme rather guardedly as 'unhelpful in cases like ours'.
i rest my case.

[MitchyInge]

Hope the work with CAMHS makes a positive difference, it's good to identify what is and isn't helpful. Keep us posted

[twoisplenty]

I am very sorry to hear about your daughter's anorexia. It's such a horrible, frightening illness.

I wondered if my experience may help a little? You mentioned that she has depression too, and it is a viscious circle with both depression and anorexia.

I had anorexia as a teen, and managed to get counselling for it after three years (not much support until then unfortunately).

However I did revisit anorexia again recently (now aged 39yrs) because I started counselling for other things, and that triggered the anorexia as a coping mechanism. It was an enormous shock from being able to eat and enjoy food enough, to being frightened of even looking at it, cooking it was horrible etc etc.

BUT someone suggested that I get help alongside the counselling. So I went to visit a highly recommended lady who is a spiritual healer. I did go with an open mind, and she is a lovely lady, very grounded actually!

Within the one hour session, I felt serene and calm. Over the next few session she somehow managed to break the cycle of depression and eating disorder. And more importantly to break the association between food and emotion.

She encouraged me to get outside, to stop hiding from the world and to show my emotions (hard!)

But really the main thing was her healing technique. It was non invasive, relaxing AND IT WORKED. I feel so much better.

This was only eight weeks ago btw. And I am still having counselling, but feeling much more in conrol of things.

I don't know if this is useful at all, but it may be worth thinking about this kind of approach? I highly recommend it, of course.

Oh, and when I was feeling really poorly, I would actively look for tv programmes with anorexia so that I could compare the illness and body shape, and also to feel that I was not alone with it. But now I am better, I have no interest in looking, it just doesn't figure. So from my point of view, watching such programmes didn't make my anorexia worse, because I couldn't possibly feel any worse than I did. The programmes actually were quite comforting, because I was not facing the illness alone iykwim. I needed to feel that I wasn't going crazy, because the thoughts running through my head seemed very crazy. That of course is a personal point of view, it may be very different for an impressionable teenager.

And I agree wholeheartedly with the part of the C4 programme with Anna, who is a good shape and in good health. She really does not help anyone struggling with ed, she makes me feel quite angry with her views of her body and how she feels she "needs" to change every bit of it - she should be teaching the viewers that body shape/size is irrelevant and to be proud of what you look like.

I hope that all made some sense, apologies for rambling.

I hope your daughter gets the help she really needs from her gp etc.

[Oblomov]

OP YABU.
I am saddened at the fact thta this is an epedemic.
I watched a supernanny programme last month where they showed 6 yr old 5 opictures of themselves. on real. 2 thinner and 2 fatter. they all wanted to be the skinniest. they all thought that the 'real one' was the fattest pictrure. made me horrified. and I have boys.
But blaming this programme is not right. Another programme asked girls how their mums ate. they hated their size. complained aboutr being fat. skipped meals. knew the calorific content of every edible thing.
all not balanced.

and as dorset says, what about general views, magazines etc etc.
this is a big problem. not just this programme.

[Oblomov]

disagree with frankie3. where does the cross over between being educational and being irresponsible start and finish then.
if you have a prograame about a woman who only eats ... = nothing, or a man who eats ... ,loads. or a woman who self harms. or a discussion on why people are peadophiles etc etc.
These programmes educate my dh and I. We haev no expereince or understanding of what people do. or why they do it. But we don't then think, oh i'm going to do that myself.

Do you feel that the Dr Chris(off embarrassing illness programme), the blond haired chap who basically criicises or condemns both patients for not eating enough and the other for eating too much. both of zero nutrituional value. do you think he is being irresponsible aswell ?

[justallovertheplace]

anorexic daughter, it really doesn't matter which topic you put this in. I was one of the people who thought you were being unreasonable I still do. You say there's not much difference between the skinny people on this programme and anorexics. Do you actually understand anorexia? Anorexia isn't a disease of the body as such. It is a disease of the mind. These people look that way because they don't eat enough, or eat the wrong things. Anorexics look that way because they have all sorts of mental issues which have made it difficult if not impossible to eat. There is a world of difference there even if it doesn't look like it to the outside world.
You say you are 6 weeks in, what made you realise your daughter has issues?
And your point about the programme being unhelpful. Let me tell you, when you're anorexic, you are fascinated by other peoples bodies. I would compare myself all the time, obsessed with who was skinnier than I was. The format of the programme will be attractive to her for that very reason. Again, that's her issue, not the programme makers. ANYONE who looks at the people on there, at both ends of the weight scale, and sees something to aspire to, has issues of their own, as you have found out.

[Lolo1987]

Absolutely agreed, she at one point says "I'll have to deal with these fat thighs"