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What do you do when you feel you can't go on?

(11 Posts)
Britney Sun 17-Apr-05 19:20:35

I feel like I'm running on auto-pilot, putting a brave face on things, when all I want to do is cry / scream / be alone / not have the responsibility of 2 young children. I feel like I'm living in a bad dream

lavenderrr Sun 17-Apr-05 19:30:20

didn't want to ignore your post britney, but don't have much advice to give here, responsibility is harder for some people than others, some people have breaks and get refreshed some people have it all the time and they feel so caged that they want out sometime...I don't know what to say, but suffice to say sometimes I find responsibility incredibly hard to cope with that occassionally I blub and escape upstairs and want some me time, do you ever get that much btw and how old are your children btw? sorry a bit rambly btw.

Mum2girls Sun 17-Apr-05 19:31:30

I sympathise Britney it's often soooo tough with 2 young children. Do you have a DP or a DH around or any family support to give you a break?

littlelamb Sun 17-Apr-05 19:31:31

i think we feel the same recently I just can't handle having responsibility for someone so helpless and I admit there are times when I resent it. To me, this is the part of motherhood that noone tells you about. Hopefully this is just a passing thing x Is there any particular reason you feel so down?

feelingdown Sun 17-Apr-05 19:31:51

huni sorry your feeling like this, as you can tell by my name im feeling bit low myself, went to doctors and he has pescribled me a low dose of anti deppressants and honestly i feel the big black cloud is starting to lift! hope you feel better soon and i'm here if you wanna chat!

feelingdown Sun 17-Apr-05 19:32:00

huni sorry your feeling like this, as you can tell by my name im feeling bit low myself, went to doctors and he has pescribled me a low dose of anti deppressants and honestly i feel the big black cloud is starting to lift! hope you feel better soon and i'm here if you wanna chat!

essbee Sun 17-Apr-05 19:32:08

Message withdrawn

Britney Sun 17-Apr-05 19:46:48

Went to see nurse practioner at my surgery in January - decided that was time that I sorted things out rather than struggling on. She spent a lot of time with me - god knows how many pissed off patients there were that day! Got health visitor involved - have not had contact with her since initial phone call as she is off sick (only found out by ringing to see why she hadn't called!) Also organised some counselling through DH's work. Have been to 2 sessions & am now waiting for referral to new counsellor as first one made me feel like the worst mother in the world & didn't remember me from one session to the next!

DH has been very supportive since I started feeling really depressed after ds was born 18 months ago. But back in February he had loads of time off work to try & help me sort things out and I feel I can't ask again. I do get some time to myself - dd is 4 & at nursery full-time & ds goes to nursery 2 mornings a week. I always use that time for catching up on housework, sitting aimlessly in front of tv etc... I just feel drained & in desperate need of time alone to get my head together & to start making sense of the mess my life has become.

Rinkydink Wed 20-Apr-05 16:25:15

Hi Britney, This is my first post, and i can really relate to how you're feeling. My daughter is 4 too, goes to nursery every afternoon, and my son is 2, he doesn't go anywhere yet, as he's very clingy. I also feel i have no time,no energy....or any idea what i'd do if i had either of those things!
Saw my health visitor today, she's suggested i socialise more, go to toddler groups, join a free course with a creche etc. But even getting the motivation is a task in itself. Do you go out at all? With friends? With the children? Fresh air is a great mood lifter for me, but walking back into a house waiting to be tidied, vacuumed etc, is such a downer!
Hope you feel brighter soon,
Luv Rinkydink x

motherofboys Wed 20-Apr-05 17:33:02

Hi there - this is my first post and I really feel for you. i have been through a lot of what you talk about and was on a/ds for over a year followed by 18months of counselling - I do feel a lot better now but still have days when everything just becomes too much. It is a case of getting things in perspective which I know sounds glib but that is what took me all that time in counselling to achieve. Take each day as it comes and set yourself really small goals to achieve each day - even if it is just sitting down with a cuppa and the paper, or ringing a friend for a chat. Mail me if you want to chat...

HondaDream Wed 20-Apr-05 21:59:23

Sorry to hear you are feeling sad. I think alot of us mums often feel so alone. Tonight at tea time I thought I was about to kill my kids so I picked up the phone called my mate and asked her how it was at her end. Pretty much like all households with young kids at teatime bedtime, stressed mum, tired kids quite a cocktail for shouting and screaming. I was very depressed after birth of dd2 (3rd child)she's 5 now, she cried non stop for a year and would not go to anyone except me. I had a bad back as she didn't walk until 16 months and I lost the plot big time. I would often sit in the kitchen with my 3 darlings and think about turning on the gas oven or when driving I would just imagine driving us all into a lake. It was all too much but yet I was supposed to be happy, nice supportive DH, supportive mother and friends. There is no anwser but talk to someone get help and it will get better with time. Ad's do help and remember you are not alone it happens to a massive percentage of us mums but we just have to keep going as you say on auto pilot as we are needed. Becoming a mum is an enourmous change and sometimes it takes afew years to adjust. Just take it step by step.

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