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please help, went to gp for advice on relaxation/counselling and had a v brutal response

(10 Posts)
mindfulmama Tue 23-Sep-08 13:11:02

I have 3 dc two of whom have special needs, but I do manage to work part time in a job i love. However, the past week I have not been coping, probably because dc2has been ill and I am so worried about his transition to secondary school. So I have been tearful. I just went to the gP to ask for advice/support for maybe counselling/relaxation to manage better and all I got was that I am scared to admit I am depressed and should have medication. !!!!
I am not scared, but I am also not depressed. i am v tired and want some ideas to relax/ rethink as my life is v busy and difficult and at times overwhelming. I am shocked that prozac is the answer to real life stress. I am also now worried that as I refused I am a bad patient who won't be listened to in future. in the end I think I am going to get referred for counselling but it was such a horrible experience I felt worse afterwards.
Any other working carers out there with tips for the down times?
THank you.

mindfulmama Tue 23-Sep-08 16:21:44


justaflyingvisit Tue 23-Sep-08 16:41:33

didnt want this to go unanswered, your GP was out of order. I don't have any experience with SN but i have been on citalopram for over a year and really had to push for counselling, its the money you see. I was/am suffering from depression though. You sound like you have alot on your plate and you also sound like you are actually coping really well. If i were you, go back and ask to see a different doctor, explain that you don't feel that ADs will work for you - they are not hte answer to everything, but they do get patients out of the doctor's office quickly.

As for relaxation, maybe you can treat yourself to some lovely smelly stuff - that works for me and look into trying to fit in some exercise (i should listen to my own advice). Are there any support groups for parents with SN children around where you live, maybe the school can point you in the right direction there.

Keep on pushing for the counselling, its available but you have to stamp your feet.

Good luck.

blinks Tue 23-Sep-08 16:51:36

try different GPs, don't waste your time feeling pissed off- most GPs are chronically shit (disclaimer- in my experience) and you usually have to push and push until you get anything more than a prescription.

take a friend/family member with you nxt time and they'll be less likely to fob you off.

justaflyingvisit Tue 23-Sep-08 20:36:59

actually that is a good point blinks, it wasn't until my DP came with me and basically told the GP, help her or she might not survive that i was given a mental health referral.

ladystardust Wed 24-Sep-08 09:31:20

I agree. Ask to see a different gp.
There's one at my surgery I refuse to see because of his appalling attitude but see another who is appropriately sympathetic. smile
Good luck.

nervousal Wed 24-Sep-08 09:41:48

from GPs point of view - often they don't have access to counselling services etca nd medication is seen as their only option. Perhaps you should consider approaching some of your local voluntary organisations for support e.g. do you have an Associaltion of Mental Health?

fymandbean Wed 24-Sep-08 09:49:54

I was put on citlopram when the 'obvious' answer was counselling. At the time i took the docs advice and went on it but it was not really suitable for my problem (all related to problems at work - I needed to be told to sort out the problems NOT try to blot them out IYSWIM!)

I had private medical insurance and got the councelling via a friends suggestion (doctor didn't mention it) - was off the citlopram speedily etc etc...

justaflyingvisit Wed 24-Sep-08 14:01:07

Nervousal is right, in our area GPs can only refer to a six session counselling block. I thought that was it, and was told i couldnt have further counselling, couldnt have CBT bla bla bla. Things came to a head and my partner came with me and more or less begged the doctor for a mental health referral. I sat there shock when i asked her what would happen, she said i would be assessed and offered an appropriate therapy such as CBT more counselling etc - i felt like screaming, why the fuck did you lot not do this for me a YEAR ago! So whilst the doctor might not be able to refer you on, get them to refer you to your mental health team. I know it might seem drastic but for me it has worked out that i now have access to counselling for as long as i need it with a view to coming off the medication at some stage. So whilst you might feel your problems don't warrant "mental health" professionals, its a means to an end. I just saw a pscyh nurse once and now signed up with a counsellor who i think will work well with me. You just have to make yourself heard.

mindfulmama Wed 24-Sep-08 14:30:23

THank you lovely people. I am so sorry to hear so many of you have had a bad time.... it is pretty shocking! I find it extraordinary that people with good reason to feel down at times get no help until they are in pieces, surely that costs more? I was trying to be sensible amd get some support ahead of a crisis! I am going to wait and see if I get a referral thru. I just want to talk to someone sensible to help me get things into perspective a bit and have strategies! Think I have a bit of SAD so just got a natural light bulb, see if that helps! Thank you all.

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