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can PND kick in after 9m?

(13 Posts)
thumbwitch Fri 12-Sep-08 20:18:54

am feeling really tearful and crap today and DS is just being difficult and for the first time I really feel like I feared I would - frustrated, irritable and wanting to just shout and scream at Ds to PLEASE just bloody BEHAVE - which is ridiculous because he is too young - and he keeps pulling my bloody hair and trying to grab my eyeballs which is just so painful...

sorry, rambling a bit but just feel like i'm not going to be able to cope with this if he gets worse... and he's not really that bad so how crap does that make me?

is this normal, is it pnd or am i going mad?

StillGotNoDyson Fri 12-Sep-08 20:21:54

Awww, dont beat yourself up about feeling frustrated.

To be honest, that's probably how your DS is feeling - hence how he's being.

If it's just today you've felt like this, then I'd not be worried about PND.

That said, mine wasnt diagnosed until DS was 7.5 months.

ConnorTraceptive Fri 12-Sep-08 20:22:38

you sound like how i feel at the moment. Sometimes i think it's definately pnd, other times i just think it's bit of tiredness and stress.

different times of day are better and worse too

VaginaShmergina Fri 12-Sep-08 20:25:40

thumbwitch I would say this is completely normal. I'm sure it's just your hormones settling back down. It's normal to feel like you want to shout at them, if you are getting pulled about from first thing in the morning til last thing at night, you end up feeling like a punch bag hmm

Just a few things that spring to mind :

Did you breast feed and recently finish ?
Have your periods settled back down ?
Could you be expecting ?
Are you eating healthily ?
Do you get any help with DS ?
Do you get out of the house much ?
Gone back to work ?
Are you getting a good nights sleep ?

Could be anyone of a number of things, try looking at the external factors first. Try going to a Health Food shop and asking for some supplements to give you a pick up.

Apologies if any of these questions are insensitive, just throwing balls up in the air !

VaginaShmergina Fri 12-Sep-08 20:27:04

BTW my PND was not diagnosed til my DD was 18 months old. We had moved about alot and I'd not had very good after care.

PeaMcLean Fri 12-Sep-08 20:31:48

Hello, I opened your thread cos I misread the title and thought you asked if PND can kick in after 9 AM.

However, more seriously, I doubt very much you're going mad, small chilren can just drive you to extremes and you can just really have bad days. Actually I found after 9am, when DH had left for work and I was faced with the day, was when I most felt like I had pnd...

Unlikely to be pnd after just one day of it though - how have you been until today? You mention you feared you'd feel this way? Have you been looking out for it? Could be PMT? Could just a bad day? I hope tomorrow is better for you. Really feeling for you.

thumbwitch Fri 12-Sep-08 21:18:48

thanks for your kind messages - I am probably over-reacting, yes.

VS - still bfing; only had 1 day of period about 1 week ago, nothing else; not pg; always eat healthily apart from xs chocolate (G&B); no help except from DH (and precious little of that today); out of the house most days; work at home (2 jobs); not enough sleep; take vits and oils daily.

Pea - mostly been ok - I think today has been harder cos DS just WOULDN'T eat his tea (second day in a row) and spat the spoonfuls everywhere, then whinged on and off for 2 hours, despite having a bf, being allowed to stand as much as he wanted - just couldn't work out what he really wanted to stop him!

I have never been tolerant of continual noise and get easily frustrated so have been pleasantly surprised up until the last couple of weeks that I was doing so well - but the frustration is growing daily as he sets his will against mine, beats me up, won't eat, won't sit, won't go in his bath - all the sort of things I would expect of him as a toddler and he's still only 9mo, so how much worse is he going to get? Bit scared now because he really isn't that bad yet and I am already verging on tearful breakdown shock

PeaMcLean Fri 12-Sep-08 22:23:02

Poor you. I have nothing wise to say sadly, (a good sleep routine was my answer to absolutely everything when DS was that age - I was a bit obsessed with it!), but do please post something on the behaviour / development boards here about his behaviour - not cos I think there's anything unusual about him but because there should be someone who can offer some wisdom on how to handle it. There must be a few things you could do to ease the situation. I really hope it gets better for you.

thumbwitch Fri 12-Sep-08 22:53:35

thanks Pea, will give it a go, maybe tomorrow when more people are awake..

divedaisy Fri 12-Sep-08 23:04:31

Honey you're under a great deal of pressure. And your DS may be feeling it too. So what if he doesn't eat - he'll not starve... try to let it go and go easy on yourself. He'll eat next time.. or later.

I had PND very badly and I'm very protective of those with it. It can manafest itself in many ways. I think you'd need to see your GP or speak to your MW as soon as you can.

Could he be teething? Have you checked his temperature? Maybe give him some paracetamol and get him checked over with your GP.

I assume this is your No 1 - I too have one (now 5)and I know I wanted everything to be perfect for him as a baby. I paniced over doing everything right, and had very short temper - everything annoyed me..

Have a big hug. PND is treatable, but it does take time. Speak to your GP.xx

thumbwitch Fri 12-Sep-08 23:12:43

thanks divedaisy, he has admittedly only started playing up since his teeth started coming through but it is so disheartening that he was doing so well with solid foods initially and now he is rejecting almost everything I give him, even stuff he was eating before. Except his rice milk and biscuit (no sugar, sweetened with banana powder, apparently) - but even that he wouldn't take at first tonight! He did eventually, thank goodness - because if he hadn't he would be awake every 3 hours or so tonight for a feed. <sigh>

ButtonMeUp Fri 12-Sep-08 23:22:13

thumbwithc - PND wasnt diagnosed with me till ds1 was 8 months old. ALthough to be honest there was alot more going on and irritabilty was just a small part.

Thant aside, it sounds like you are finding it tricky. Ds2 is coming up 8 and half months and is incredible mobile, strong willed and into everything. It is very tiring at times especially with little sleep. Do you have any friends with babies of similar age or any groups you go to (sorry if you already said this). It just sometimes helps to share those tricky times iykwim.

Re the whinging and refusing food, persoanlly i wold let him have extra breast feeds and not worry too much about the solid foods (dont make it a battle ground). No child has ever willfully startved themselves and his ietry requirements can be satisfied by your breast milk. I also have to feed ds2 in a quiet darker room away from others as he finds it hard to settle with so many distractions.

He is also exploring your body (although not particularly gently) and doesnt understand why you dont seem pleased. Perhaps then becoming whiney because he senses your feelings.

Another thing my ds2 is doing is crying when put down or if i am out of sight. He doesnt understand i will be back and is genuinly upset. I have read your baby and child by Peneolpe Leach and it is brilliant and helps put all this into perspective.

Sounds like you are doing a great job but need some rest and reassurance xx

thumbwitch Fri 12-Sep-08 23:34:25

thanks Button - yes he is doing that crying whenever I am out of sight thing, and he can't bear to be left, even on the bed by my side while I am working on my computer, for more than a few minutes.

Didn't join any groups as was supposed to be emigrating in October this year, but we're not going now til next Spring so I ought to go find one, only it interferes with my working hours! Still, ought to try... thanks for help.

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