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You have made me cry.

(61 Posts)
Lonelymum Tue 22-Feb-05 10:32:20

I am sorry I posted at all on the other thread about popular mumsnetters. I said something to cheer up the people who felt down and nearly all I got was abuse back.

Someone said I knew nothing about other people's circumstances and that is true. But it is also true that none of you know about mine either. I talk on Mumsnet deliberately because of it anonymity. I don't want you to know me because I know you won't like me if you do.

I didn't mean to offend anyone and I am sorry if you took offence. Can you now say that you are sorry for reducing a very unhappy individual to floods of uncontrollable tears?

collision Tue 22-Feb-05 10:37:06

OH no! I am so sorry you are so upset.....I did think people were rather harsh.

Please keep posting.

colditzmum Tue 22-Feb-05 10:37:17

Oh no lonelymum, don't cry! People say things on MN with much less provocation than they would need in real life, I think it's the anonimity that does it. Who says we wouldn't like you? I think if tou are feeling down it is easy to think that just because you don't like yourself, noone will like you, but that just isn't true!

I know you didn't mean to offend anyone, I am sure most of us do, but there are lots of people logging on to this site, so no matter what you say, or how you say it, you ar4e sure to offend someone!

Don't get upset hun, it's really not worth it!

lockets Tue 22-Feb-05 10:37:55

Message withdrawn

collision Tue 22-Feb-05 10:40:12

Re read the other one has really taken offense.

jangly Tue 22-Feb-05 10:47:57

Lonelymum - always remember - click on the turn off button and the whole bloody lot goes away!!!

Lonelymum Tue 22-Feb-05 10:48:43

Well they are just very rude then. It makes me wonder when people say "but look at all the support you have had on Mumsnet" and then the next moment they are knocking me down. Either support or knock me down, but don't do both please!

Sorry, I am having a terrible day and no-one knows it but me.

Enid Tue 22-Feb-05 10:49:13

always a good idea not to post anything that is in the slightest bit inflammatory if you are feeling delicate - take it from me

HunkerMunker Tue 22-Feb-05 10:49:59

Hugs LM. Am with you on the awful day too hun (just about to post about it, but wanted to {{{{{hug}}}}} you first)

jessicasmummy Tue 22-Feb-05 10:51:06

lonelymum - not sure what thread we are talking about, but i still liek you.... i know how you feel and have lots and lots of BIG {{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}} from me xxx

Toothache Tue 22-Feb-05 10:53:40

Lonelymum - It wasn't that bad was it????

Its very easy to misinterpret postings. And that's what happened with yours. Wouldn't worry about it, I don't think it was a serious falling out. Just a kind of.... ooooh where did that comment come from?

But I'm sure now everyone will realise it was a misunderstanding.

dejags Tue 22-Feb-05 10:57:53

Dont worry about it LM - happens from time to time that posts get misunderstood. I had a right go at piffle the other night because of a misunderstanding and felt really bad afterwards.

These things happen love, we still like you

Lonelymum Tue 22-Feb-05 11:00:01

I just know from RL that these little comments I make never get forgotten and sour relationships in the long term. I am very emotional today, but seeing people who have been so kind and supportive towards me lately suddenly saying harsh things makes me feel I have lost those supporters just as I do in RL.

Why are people so touchy? I don't mean to be offensive. I was trying to cheer up the people who are obviously upset not to be remembered by other Mmsnetters because I know how they feel.

WideWebWitch Tue 22-Feb-05 11:00:52

Oh no! I said that, I'm really sorry, I didn't want to make you cry or upset you, I just thought your comment was harsh and said so. I'm going back to look at the other thread to see if I was over the top. Sorry if you thought so though.

WideWebWitch Tue 22-Feb-05 11:03:28

I've just looked, you suggested that people who post here a lot don't have a RL, or that's what I took from your post "Just to be a sour puss, some Mners are memorable quite simply because they always seem to be online and have the time to build up a wide network of poeple they chat to. perhaps those people who are miffed not to have been mentioned are actually the lucky ones: they have a RL to lead occasionally!" So it's not surprising you got some stick for it, is it?I don't think anyone was attacking you personally, they were just disagreeing with you politely. Got to go, baby wants me!

Enid Tue 22-Feb-05 11:05:12

your comment WAS a bit harsh. But it doesn't mean people will stop liking you! We all forgive and forget round here, thank god otherwise I would be completely shunned on a regular basis . Honestly, don't worry about it.

Toothache Tue 22-Feb-05 11:08:14

Agree with WWW - Lonelymum, just as some people got a little offended by your comment.... you have gotten majorly offended about the responses, to the point where you're crying!

It's just a misunderstanding.... lets all have a group hug and forget alllllll about it.

Toothache Tue 22-Feb-05 11:08:53

Good GOD Enid - me too!!

Twiglett Tue 22-Feb-05 11:10:37

oh gawd I was the first to sat that your comment was a bit harsh .. maybe because it touched a nerve with me and if I'm honest I do feel I spend too much time on here and worry about what friends in RL would think of me for doing so .. it is very easy for people to be scathing about your leisure choices and spoil it for you

I have never suffered from depression and I understand that it is a horrific illness where things can get blown out of proportion in your own mind

I stand by what I said Lonelymum .. I read your post and felt a little taken aback and felt it was 'a little harsh' .. but I want you to know that there are no hard feelings and I am sorry you are feeling so bad about it .. I can't treat you any differently than I would treat any other poster on here .. but I do like you and your postings (whether you like me or not )

snafu Tue 22-Feb-05 11:11:30

LM, you did say you were being a 'sour puss' - from what I can see the worst that happened is that some of us agreed with you!

Am genuinely sorry if you were upset by the responses you got, but I hardly think you're going to be shunned or disliked for it. I prefer the people that speak their minds, anyway, and you did. So don't worry about it.

NameChangingMancMidlander Tue 22-Feb-05 11:13:00

Hear hear twiglett

NameChangingMancMidlander Tue 22-Feb-05 11:19:44

Just re-read the thread and I have to say that noone stuck me as being particularly scathing in response to your comment, Lonelymum.

I have a great deal of sympathy for your situation, (what you have revealed of it on here, anyway) but I think it's a little unfair to develop this thread demanding an apology for hurting your feelings, and I won't hide behind a psuedonim(sp?) to say that.

handlemecarefully Tue 22-Feb-05 11:21:25


Trust me - you have blown this out of proportion. I am still really sorry that you are so upset though

Hugs to you

Snugs Tue 22-Feb-05 11:21:27

Preview, edit and preview again - thats my motto! Stuff comes across all wrong without the benefit of tone of voice Lonelymum and unfortunately your post sounded like a harsh dig on prolific posters, so people responded in kind

I have had postings jumped on because I wrote them too quickly without realising how they would be percieved - and then spent ages digging myself out of a hole. Most of the time I just change my mind and don't post at all because I don't feel as if I have the right to join in.

Gumdrop Tue 22-Feb-05 11:22:17

Oh Lonelymum, please don't be upset. FWIW I was depressed yesterday that my name wasn't mentioned, and angry with myself that I kept checking back to the thread.

I felt as if the times that I'd posted trying to help someone had been ignored. Which then led me to wondering whether everyone read my posts and then just thought "stupid sentimental cow" and moved on.

Actually it really brought back the feelings I had at school 25 odd years ago, about not being part of the popular crowd. But I'm not 13 anymore. I shouldn't need the approval or recognition of a group of people I don't know anything about, so personally, I'm going to try very hard and ignore the "I'm part of the in crowd" type threads from now on.

I am thinking about changing my posting name to "Still lurking" or "The Outsider" though .

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