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I don't want to be here again.

(19 Posts)
OrmIrian Thu 04-Sep-08 13:53:19

Can't cope with anything. Not even the easy things. Started off with just feeling very tired, dog tired. Couldn't get out of bed in the mornings. no energy to do anything. On the way to our holiday DCs were shouting and bickering, DH getting angry with them. I burst into tears and started to shake. DH thought I was mad. Scared the DCs sad. Went for a big shop first day - DH insisted we all went ( great!) and I couldn't deal with the noise and the confusion. Went to pieces again. Have been like that ever since more or less. Last night was the worst yet. My DCs are worried about me ...which really is shite. Racing heart, can't sleep, shaking. Why? Why now?

Tell me what to do first please? Been on anti-Ds when I had PND, and while they helped in their way they weren't great and I'd like to avoid them if possible. WHat else can the GP do?

FioFio Thu 04-Sep-08 13:57:52

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masalachameleon Thu 04-Sep-08 13:58:22

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

dizzydixies Thu 04-Sep-08 13:58:56

what about something more for anxiety rather than depression?

do you have a good relationship with your GP that you can discuss ALL options?

am sorry you're feeling like this

OrmIrian Thu 04-Sep-08 14:00:19

Thanks. I've had beta blockers fio, when I couldn't pass my driving test for sheer terror! They helped with that but not sure I'd want to take them for longer periods. I don't want to go but DH got mad with me last night and basically told me I had to.

Might try Kalms too.

dizzydixies Thu 04-Sep-08 14:01:48

they gave me citalopram for anxiety which was fine and can be given in different doses - have you hd that one before?

OrmIrian Thu 04-Sep-08 14:03:47

I used to meditate chamaleon. I must try again. Running is my best therapy but I've hurt my foot so can't do that atm.

I don't have a GP dixies. I go to a massive practice and you never see the same one twice. So no relationship at all as such. Very hard broaching the subject with a stranger. GP:'Now what can I do for you today?' Me:'Ermm well I'm feeling a bit anxious'. Not great. But got to be done I suppose.

OrmIrian Thu 04-Sep-08 14:04:44

No not had that one dixies. I'm sure you are right btw, that it's anxiety rather than depression as such.

dizzydixies Thu 04-Sep-08 14:05:50

oh thats shite - ours is going that way too and I don't think it improves the service at all

what about when you DO go for an appt mention that continuity of care would be appreciated and can they prebook appts so you can be assured of seeing the same person again?

can you go swimming instead of running or is your foot too bad

I always find going for a swim very calming and cleansing for the mind

dizzydixies Thu 04-Sep-08 14:07:42

I was prescribed if for PND as I was presenting more with anxiety than anything else - I wouldn't go to shops through fear of setting off alarms, couldn't decide which sleeping dc to lift in out of car first incase something happened to the one left in the car in the 2 minutes it would take me to carry the other one in hmm

its a funny thing but feels SO genuine at the time, the good thing is you've realised its happening again smile

Notquitegrownup Thu 04-Sep-08 14:13:01

Echoing all of the sensible advice here. I too have been where you are now.

When you go to the doctors, do take a copy of your post here. It explains very clearly what you are going through and any sensible GP will understand and respond to you sympathetically. (Or you could just do what I did, wonder what to say, then burst into tears! It worked too!)

I think that counselling would help you enormously, particularly as your dh seems rather unsympathetic to how you are feeling - though that may be down to a lack of understanding on his part. Until you have suffered from anxiety, it is very hard to understand.

Swimming and asking for the same GP are both great ideas.

Keep on posting too. You will feel better, but in the meantime, there are others here - more than you think - who have felt as you do.

OrmIrian Thu 04-Sep-08 14:15:10

Thanks nqgu.

I will be back to running again asap. I need the space and the solitude as much as the exercise. DH is a bit unsympathetic. He has depression when he father died so he tends to think there has to be some big event like that that causes it.

FioFio Thu 04-Sep-08 14:24:43

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FioFio Thu 04-Sep-08 14:25:08

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bundle Thu 04-Sep-08 14:41:57

OrmIrian, I had terrible symptoms of anxiety a year or so back, following a series of events in my life.

I too have quite a large GP practice but saw the same one each week for ages (last appt so we could "overrun"!) and I did take ADs for a while. Had counselling too. Really helped.

OrmIrian Fri 05-Sep-08 08:21:28

Thank you for your advice and support everyone.

At the moment there is a rather large problem - in the shape of a plaster cast on right foot and some crutches - which I think will be forcing me to slow down a little! I am trying to look at it from a positive viewpoint - ie I can't get in to work, I have to stop doing things all the time so maybe I'll relax. But TBH I feel so miserable. Can't even make a cuppa or have a bath.

Notquitegrownup Fri 05-Sep-08 09:48:45

Oh nooo. Is that a new cast, or have you been hobbling around for a while?

Sending you a virtual cup of tea! Hope you have a few chocs to hand. Chocolate always helps me.

OrmIrian Fri 05-Sep-08 09:51:00

New cast. But I've been hobbling since Monday when A&E told me it wasn't broken!

Notquitegrownup Fri 05-Sep-08 13:17:30

Loadsa sympathy. Can't be making things any easier for you. Now, get your dh to make you a flask of tea tomorrow, and get some chocs in too!

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