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What do you do if you feel you can't move on from your past, even if you've had counselling and had felt you had dealt with it before?

(10 Posts)
ZiggyStardust Sat 30-Aug-08 21:51:21

Because this is where I am now and I'm finding it very frustrating. It's affecting everything. Work, home life and I'm finding it increasingly annoying.

I'm not sure what has triggered it off because if you'd asked me a few years ago, I would have said I'd dealt with everything fine.

My only clue to why this is happening now is that my eldest child is at the age where I can remember 'things' happening to me and I wonder whether that has sparked things off in my head. My confidence is not very high at the moment either, which is unusual for me but I can't seem to dig my way back up.

Have done counselling. Only thing I haven't tried are ADs but I don't think I am properly depressed just sort of stuck iyswim. Any tips?

Bewilderbeast Sat 30-Aug-08 21:54:11

do you have depression or rather a history of depression. For me these things go in cycles of about 2 to 4 years. I et treatment and counselling, it all gets dealt with and goes away 2-4 years later it comes back again. It might be worth talking to your doctor about getting a few more counselling sessions or see if your employer provides them confidentially if you have an employee assistance programme.

Marina Sat 30-Aug-08 21:55:37

Some psychotherapists would say that you are never done with counselling...what helped you through an earlier period of distress may not be enough indefinitely
I think you are absolutely right to have made the link between your eldest child's age and your own childhood memories. IME this is very often a trigger point for experiencing flashbacks.
Is it possible for you to ask for a new referral, or go back to your GP?
Good luck.

ZiggyStardust Sat 30-Aug-08 22:00:49

Thank you both.

No, no history of depression at all. But I suppose, being brutally honest with myself, I would say I have had anxiety issues in the past and a tendency to have anxiety before certain events but I've never had that treated (mainly because I didn't feel it was necessary and didn't want it to be).

I have never spoken to the GP about it. Sought out counselling myself as I understand from friends how long the waiting lists are around here.

I understand what you are saying about further counselling and you are most likely right but I feel so impatient about this now... I just wish it would go away and I almost feel despair at the thought of having to go and talk through things again (and at the cost of it, though I know it is important!).

Maybe that is just normal!

princessglitter Sat 30-Aug-08 22:01:57

Hypnotherapy can be effective for this kind of thing.

ZiggyStardust Sat 30-Aug-08 22:04:14

also, re the cycles, my last counsellor indicated that he thought I had been depressed throughout my childhood (a definite possibility, I was thoroughly miserable the whole time) and that when I left home, I had an almost euphoric period for about 10 years where I was 'making up' for those years and actively running away from them but then everything caught up with me and at the same time, I met dh, had children, got a new job, moved house and now, for the first time in almost 4 decades, we're settled in a house, all the children are at school, both of us are working and now, just when things should be great, NOW, it choose to revisit me!

ZiggyStardust Sat 30-Aug-08 22:05:02

sorry chooses

how does hypnotherapy work?

Bewilderbeast Sat 30-Aug-08 22:11:03

Ziggy, it may be coming back now because you have the time to think about it if you see what I mean. If things are settling down and stable and you aren't frantically running around then your brain has some spare time to start dragging up memories and questions and screwing you up. Exercise helps sometimes as it triggers the production of endorphins or you could try writing everything down as a way of getting it out of your head - that never worked for me but I know it does for a friend of mine

ZiggyStardust Sat 30-Aug-08 22:18:31

Thanks, yes I think I will definitely try the exercise. I started writing things down but it felt very strange. Maybe I will do that again.

Just realised what I said below sounds a bit contradictory! As an adult, I've never been depressed. The counsellor thought it was possible I was depressed as a child but he also admitted it would have been perfectly normal to be utterly miserable given what I was going through at the time!

Isn't life a pita sometimes. What I would do for a bit of peace and quiet and an easy ride!

princessglitter Sat 30-Aug-08 22:22:38

Hypnotherapy can help you to release feelings and negative thoughts. It works on your subconscious mind rather than your conscious. It removes blocks to recovery and can heal emotional wounds.

I have had six lots of hypnotherapy and have been able to release things I would have found difficult to even talk about through conventional counselling.

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